These days you and your favorite guy friend spend a lot of time together. Suddenly, you blush every time he talks, and you realize you want more than just friends. It feels like you want to say something, but are afraid to take a step because you don't know if he feels the same way. Did he put you in the friend zone, or did he like you back? Continue reading to find out!
Step
Part 1 of 5: Watch What He Says
Step 1. Pay attention to the way he talks to you
His body language can tell you how he feels. Here are the things to note:
- Listen to his tone. His tone of voice can show how much effort he puts into his words. If he sounded cautious and indecisive, maybe he was seriously thinking about what to say.
- Pay attention to his eye contact. Does he look you in the eye when he talks, or does he just look the other way? If he maintains direct eye contact, it shows you are his main focus and he is interested in your conversation. However, keep in mind that he may avoid eye contact out of embarrassment.
- Notice if he gets distracted easily. If someone else is talking to him while you're chatting, does he just ignore your conversation right away? If this happens more than once, he may not see what you're saying is important.
Step 2. Keep an eye on the selected topics
What you guys talk about can be an indication of his views on you. Some signs to watch for are:
- Tempt. Playful flirting can be a sign that he wants you to tease him back. If you're brave enough, try a light tease to warm things up.
- Personal information. When he talks about his problems, it means he trusts you. Deeper conversations, such as trauma or family issues, may mean he wants a deeper relationship with you.
- Praise. He comments on your intelligence, appearance, etc., perhaps a sign that he admires who you are. If he compliments you more than often, he may be interested in you.
- His behavior. Maybe he softens his usually rude behavior around you. For example, when he is with his friends his behavior is messy, but he tries to be gentler when he is with you. This is a sign that he is paying attention to you and what you are saying.
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Discussion about past relationships. Your conversation with him may go back to your past relationship. This indicates he's subtly checking whether you're single or interested in another guy.
If he keeps trying to set you up with other men, you may indeed be in the friend zone
Step 3. Listen to her comments about other girls
You can tell if he just wants some dating advice from you, or if you're the girl he's after. Constantly asking your advice indicates that he may really only be interested in your opinion as a woman. However, he could also be gathering information about the man of your dreams.
Find out about his past relationships. If he has many ex-girlfriends but short relationships, that's an indication he's a real player or is trying to make you jealous
Step 4. Watch his behavior when you are away
Some shy guys are obvious about their feelings online or on the phone. Identify the way he communicates with you, using the following methods:
- Phone. Her voice will show her feelings. A nervous, hesitant, and stuttering tone of voice may be an indication he has feelings for you. Long conversations also increase the chances that he is interested in you. But if he doesn't return your calls or tries to end the conversation as quickly as possible, he may not want to pursue a serious relationship with you.
- E-mail. Funny emails with good grammar show his efforts to show his intelligence and cleverness. Meaning he spends time crafting the message for you.
- SMS. Maintaining a relationship with you outside of school or work means that he wants to make you a part of his life. Instead of using texting for formal business, he uses it to send jokes or start a conversation with you. If he puts extra effort into texting you, he may want to put extra effort into your relationship.
- Facebook. Does he “like” a lot of your photos and post frequently on your wall? This may be a sign that he's always watching you.
- Do not make all the tips above as the only grip. Some guys aren't interested in phone, email, or Facebook. He might prefer to meet you in person, and there's nothing wrong with that!
Part 2 of 5: Watch What He Does
Step 1. Pay attention to his body language
Body language is a great way to tell if he's trying to hug you or just having fun together. Catch these signs:
- An unintentional touch. If he's trying to get past the touch line, it means he wants to be in more touch with you. A light touch or touching hands can enhance your friendship.
- Stare. His admiration for you is evident in his gaze. If you catch his eye and he smiles before turning away, he understands he's been caught seeing you.
- Body leaning. See if his body is involved when you talk to him. If his whole body is on you, he is open to listening to you. He may also lean closer to you. However, be aware that this method is not the same for everyone. Some may be used to sitting with a certain posture.
Step 2. Watch what he does for you
Is he trying hard to be a good friend? This may be his attempt to grab your attention and win your heart. Watch for these signs to find out when the action has crossed the friendship line:
- He always does good for you. These good deeds can include giving you a ride, treating you to a meal, helping with chores, etc. She performs the role of a lover.
- He's caring. If he gives you your favorite cake from the pastry shop or buys you a book you've been wanting to read for a long time, he's paying attention to your needs.
- He comforts you. Not many men want to comfort a girl who is sad. But if he cares, he'll be there listening to all your complaints and giving you his shoulder to cry on.
Step 3. Look at how he treats other girls
His treatment of other girls can be used as a clue about his feelings for you. Here are some ways to give you a better idea of how he really feels:
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He treats you differently than other girls. Even though he may be nice to others, you are the only one he wants when he is with a group of people. It's also possible that you're the only woman he flirts with or hugs. If you are treated differently from other women, this is a sign that his eyes are on you.
But, if you see him flirting and touching every woman, maybe he's just a flirt
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He flaunts his relationship in front of you. If he lets you hang out with him with his new crush, maybe he just sees you as a friend.
However, if you're there to let him know what you're thinking, this could be a sign that he knows you're for him. If he's hesitant to take other girls out, he may already see you as his girlfriend and feel disloyal when asking other girls
Step 4. See if he makes an effort to be with you
It's a very clear sign that he wants to take the relationship to the next level. Here are some ways to find out how he really feels:
- He keeps asking you out. This is a clear indication that he wants to be with you more often. It also gives him the opportunity to ask you out or try to get closer.
- He approaches you when in a group. If he wants to be your partner in class or at games, chances are, he really enjoys being with you.
- He kept trying to be “around you” and asked if he could come along. If he's arguing that he wants to chat, he may be embarrassed about his feelings for you.
Part 3 of 5: Watch How and How Often You Spend Time Together
Step 1. Pay attention to the types of activities you do together
Are you involved in activities that are like dating, or are good friends? Paying close attention to how you spend your time can help you understand his true intentions and goals. Here are things to watch out for:
- Do you do things that smell like a couple even though you're not dating yet? Are you shopping together, cooking together, or shopping at the supermarket with one basket together? This may be a sign that he considers you to be his partner.
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When you are together, are you alone or with a group of other people? This could be an indication he wants you to be more than just a friend.
- If he takes ten of his friends or all of his roommates along, he probably doesn't see you as more than a friend. But pay attention – if he's just asking another pair of guys to join him, he may want to partner with you.
- But if he brings his siblings, best friends, or if (hooray!) somehow you finally meet his parents, this is a sure sign that he wants you to be an important part of his life.
Step 2. Pay attention to how often you go out together
You can tell a lot about what's really on his mind by considering the fact how often and how long you've been together.
- If you rarely go a day without seeing him, he may want to spend the day and night with you. However, if you only see him once a month and he doesn't live far from where you are, then he probably doesn't want to see you that much.
- Pay attention to how much time you spend together. Did your coffee date develop into a three-hour philosophical discussion, or did he get so caught up in time that you needed to remind him? If he can't stop talking, it's a sign he wants something more.
Part 4 of 5: Pay Attention to When and Where You Spend Your Time
Step 1. Pay attention to where you meet
One easy way to tell if he wants more than friendship is to assess the places he takes you on a date. Here are some ways to see if he's trying to take your relationship further:
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When you go out to eat, pay attention to the type of restaurant. If you're at a bar that's fun, noisy, serving quirky food, he may see you as more than a friend. If you go to a quiet restaurant, by candlelight, with a bottle of wine, he may want to say something. But, if he sits next to you in the school cafeteria, it probably means he's not interested in a romantic relationship.
- Look at the other people in the restaurant. Are they a loving couple, or a bunch of excited friends chatting and laughing? This can explain what he thinks of you.
- Dont think to much. Maybe he really likes you, but he also likes grilled meats. Location can be used as an indicator, but can not be a benchmark for everything.
- If he asked you to watch a movie, what kind of movie would it be? Do you watch romantic comedies or sad films, bloody war films or documentaries? His movie of choice can tell you whether he wants to put his arm around you or just wants to be with friends.
- When you go to a show, is it jazz or opera, or even a death metal concert that leaves your ears half-deaf? Is the place a kind of field where you stand and dance, or sit back and enjoy the show romantically?
Step 2. The time you go is as important as the place
This could be a clue as to whether he sees you as a casual friend or if he's trying to take you to the next level. Pay attention to these two things:
- Did you meet during the day, or at night? There's a big difference between a lunch date and a dinner date, or morning coffee and evening drinks. If you guys tend to see each other during the day, you're in the friend zone, but that doesn't necessarily mean he doesn't want more.
- Are you traveling on weekdays or weekends? If you meet on Monday instead of Friday, again, you're in the friend zone.
Part 5 of 5: Find Out If He Really Likes You
Step 1. Ask people around
An easy way to find out how he feels is to ask someone else. Of course, you have to do this carefully because you don't want him to know how you feel about him. Here are some ways:
- Ask his friends, casually. Ask her friends if she's in love with someone. Choose a friend that you really trust, even though it's really hard to find a man who wants to violate a man's ethics and doesn't report it to him.
- Ask your female friends. Your friends have seen the two of you together and they can tell you an honest observation.
- Ask your friend to ask him. Again, do this step with care. If you don't want to be too direct, have a girl friend ask her if she has someone special. For example, your girlfriend may pretend that she wants to set her up with another woman.
Step 2. Don't stalk or stalk
There's no faster way to get rid of a man's interest than to be an obsessive woman who tries to figure out every detail of his life. The following should be avoided as much as possible:
- Peek at his cell phone. If he leaves his phone, "don't" check if he's texting another girl. If caught, you will be in great danger.
- Take a peek at the contents of his email or Facebook message. If he leaves his computer for a while, resist the temptation to do so.
- Follow him everywhere to see who's with him. This will make him feel free, instead of falling in love.
Step 3. Be brave and tell him how you feel
Ultimately, there will be no progress if you don't take the initiative. If you're pretty sure he likes you or you're just feeling bold and have nothing to lose, then go ahead and tell him how you feel.
- Cheer up and get excited. Don't take it seriously. There's no need to set a place and time for everything to meet and say, "I have something important to tell you." Just find the right moment to say you like him and want to know if he feels the same way. Don't make it seem like a big problem, don't let him feel guilty if his heart says otherwise.
- Find fun ways to express your feelings. You can send him a note, a valentine's gift, or ask him to solve a puzzle. Don't overdo it, but if you think outside the box, he might be impressed.
Step 4. Don't be too upset if he doesn't reciprocate your feelings
In the end, he may not be your soul mate. If you want to continue the friendship, keep the following in mind:
- Don't be too upset if he doesn't reciprocate your feelings. This will only make everyone sad in the end. You better let it go.
- Remind yourself that he is a great friend and how lucky you are to have him. You may not have a chance to develop a romance with him, but you can still make him a great friend.
- Know when to take your distance. If your feelings of love have blossomed like roses, maybe it's time to take a break from the relationship because it might hurt a lot. If you stop liking him, you can go out together again. However, there is nothing more painful than the excruciating feeling of being with someone who can't reciprocate your feelings.
Tips
- Be yourself! If he doesn't like you for who you are then he doesn't deserve you.
- Some guys will lose interest in you if you don't show interest in them. Showing your interest just a little can help, especially when dealing with shy guys.
- If you want to get his attention, don't be too direct. He will think you are crazy and start avoiding you.
- Ask him if he likes anyone in your class. Maybe his face is flushed or looking down. If so, that means he's trying to cover it up.
- Don't act macho like a guy around him, because he'll start to think you're one of his guy friends.
- Find out what he likes and learn about it. He will be happy if you have a lot in common.
- If you know your male friend is a mod, your chances will be different. Maybe he's just trying to flirt with you for fun.
- Don't laugh too much when you're with your friends as he walks by, guys are sometimes paranoid about what you're talking about, and that's not good!
