Having a conversation that is not awkward with your idol is certainly doable and fun. It's so fun, the conversations that are made allow you to go for a walk or go on a date with him. Learn how to talk to your crush the way you would your best friend, make fun comments, and ask simple and unexpected questions that fuel an exciting relationship. Even if he suddenly feels awkward, having a pleasant chat can make him want to talk to you more or more often.
Step
Part 1 of 3: Preparing Before Starting a Conversation
Step 1. Wait for the right time and place to start a conversation
Awkwardness can be avoided if you can find the right time to talk to your idol. The right time to start a conversation, among other things, is before class, lunch break, after school or after certain events. Take this time to start a conversation with him. Some good places to start a conversation with him include the bus stop, a bus stop or other public transportation, the school cafeteria, a party or dance event, or a gathering.
- Make sure you have enough time to chat (minimum of a few minutes). There are some times that are considered too short to chat. One example of an inappropriate time to chat with someone is before class starts. This may not be a good time to try to start a conversation because your speech will be cut off and you'll feel silly for starting the conversation at that point.
- Try not to start a conversation when waiting in line or passing each other.
- Think of ways that your schedule can match his. Plan to strike up a conversation when the two of you have some free time.
- Are there events to be held? Find out if there's a dance, party, or school event coming up so you can visit and start a conversation with your crush at the event.
Step 2. Talk to him as if you already knew him
Conversation will feel awkward if someone is very stiff towards the other person, as if he treats the other person like a stranger. Instead, treat him as if you knew him well. Even if you don't know him that well, you need to talk to him in a friendly and warm tone. You can also start the conversation with an introduction while using a warm, friendly tone of voice by saying (for example), “Hi! I don't know if we've actually met. My name is Tara. How are you?"
- When chatting with friends, try to pay attention to your tone of voice, hand gestures, and facial expressions used. When talking to your crush, try to be as comfortable and natural as possible, like when you talk to your friends.
- Don't act like you know him, as if you already know him or know things about him. For example, don't say, “Hey! How did it happen?”
Step 3. Find out what he might want to talk about
If you know what he's interested in, his life, his friends, his favorite things, etc., use your knowledge to your advantage. You don't have to focus specifically on these things when talking to him, but you can talk about things that have something to do with what he's interested in. For example, if you know that he likes the beach, you can chat about surfing activities you used to do. You also don't need to mention that you know he likes the beach. Just talk about the beach as you would when you chat with your beach-loving friends.
Conversations can feel awkward when you pretend you know more about them than you really do. Awkwardness can also arise when you act like you don't know anything about them (even though you do know some things about them)
Step 4. Freshen your breath before speaking
This can be an easy way to feel confident and prevent awkwardness. Buy a pack of sugar-free gum with xylitol to take with you to school or wherever you'll meet her. Chewing gum without sugar will encourage the mouth to produce saliva so that your breath becomes fresher. You will also find it easier to talk. Chew gum for five minutes after eating and a few minutes before you talk to him.
- If you're going to a dance or some other event that allows you to be very close, you can use a mouthwash after brushing your teeth to freshen your breath.
- Avoid eating foods that can make your breath stink, such as onions and garlic.
- Drink water. In this way, food debris and bacteria that cause bad breath can be lifted from the mouth.
Part 2 of 3: Starting and Having a Conversation
Step 1. Make funny or fun comments about where you are right now or what you're doing
Use comments as an ice breaker to start a conversation. Look and pay attention to what is around you. Did you notice anything funny or interesting? For example, if it's lunch time and the school canteen isn't open yet, you could say, "Are they going to give us water to drink while we wait for the cafeteria to open, or are they going to starve us to death?" If you want to say something simple, try to make it sound funny. Even when you don't feel like a funny person, you can still be a fun person. Such characters are seen as very attractive, both for men and women. Plus, such fun characters will make conversation fun and keep the mood up.
Do not worry. The first comments you make to your crush won't immediately make the conversation feel smooth (but don't spoil it either). The important thing to do is start a conversation. Therefore, don't worry if the conversation doesn't feel smooth, and try to focus on continuing the conversation with him
Step 2. Find out what he's been up to lately, especially if you and he like the same things
After you've said your conversation starter, move on to things you can talk about further. You can ask him if you've known him before, or if you took the same class as him. It's a good idea to get to know each other by talking about things you both have an interest in. This way, the conversation won't feel awkward. In addition, you can also understand it better through things that you both like/live. For example, if you took the same class with him (or in the same class as him), you could say, "How are you preparing for the midterms?"
You don't need to say you took the same class as him, unless you're not sure he knows (or is aware of it). If you want to remind him, do it without saying it out loud. You could say (for example), "For English courses, how are you preparing for the midterms?" It's not unusual to find out that you're taking the same class as him. If he doesn't know (or realizes) that you're in the same class as him, he'll be surprised when you say “English course” and may apologize for not knowing/realizing that you're in the same class
Step 3. Ask his opinion on things that are easy to talk about
The topic of conversation can end easily so it's a good idea to prepare simple and open questions for your idol. You can tell him about things you do or know, then ask his opinion about it. The questions asked can also relate to where you are right now or what you are doing. For example, if you're eating apples at lunch, you might say, “I think Granny Smith apples are the most delicious apples in the world. How about you? What kind of apple is the best?” Again, being fun is a great way to make conversations less awkward and fun, especially when you're chatting about simple things and just starting a conversation.
Don't ask questions that are too controversial. Stay away from hot topics like politics or religion
Step 4. Ask questions that are unexpected, but still easy to answer
Try to make a unique connection between the topic of conversation and the person you are talking to. You can ask questions that are unusual, but still interesting. For example, you could ask, “Are there any celebrities that other people or you feel are similar to you?” Questions like this used to make him laugh. After he tells a celebrity he thinks or someone else looks like, you can agree or not. You can also tell him which celebrity you think he looks like (and you can lie as a joke, too).
- Avoid small talk or obvious questions asked to find out about his life. It's best not to ask questions like "Where are you from?" because you will get the answer he has been saying for a long time.
- Casual and exciting conversations like this help both of you to feel more comfortable with each other.
Step 5. Say the opening sentence that comes to mind
If you don't have many opportunities to talk to your crush and you suddenly get one (even if you haven't prepared yourself), take the opportunity to talk to him directly with a conversation starter. Part of having a crush on someone is being awkward (and sometimes that's what makes it fun). Dont think to much! Immediately approach and start a conversation with him.
- It's a good idea to jump right into conversation starters because you can bypass the first interaction restrictions. Remember that it's not how you start a conversation with him that matters; the most important thing is that you can keep the conversation going.
- Sometimes by showing guts, you can feel confident.
Part 3 of 3: Keeping the Conversation
Step 1. Ask him questions about his interests, hobbies, or work
After you build a good relationship with him, try to get to know him more closely. Start by asking about things he has previously said or noticed in your interactions with him. For example, “I see you brought some books. What are you reading? A simple question like this shows him that you are interested in him. After that, you can ask follow-up questions.
- For example, if he seems interested in talking about books, ask more questions/raise topics related to books. You could say, for example, “Wow, you really enjoyed reading that book. My favorite book from that author is (mention the title of your favorite book by that author).”
- Or, if he's not really interested in the book, you can direct the conversation to a more open topic. You could say, for example, "So, what are your plans for this week?"
- Don't bring up conversation topics that show that you already know what he's interested in because that can make you feel awkward. For example, if you know that he likes playing soccer, don't bring up the topic of soccer right away. Don't say, "Tell me about your interest in soccer." Instead, let the conversation progress towards the topic naturally.
Step 2. Be an active listener in the conversation
Your crush will feel more comfortable talking to you when you can be a good listener. After you start a conversation, you have to sit or stand facing him or show a listening position so you can hear and see his face easily. Another aspect to consider in being a good listener is to show consistent (but not constant) eye contact throughout the conversation.
- Avoid things that distract. Don't text or look at your phone when he's talking. This can leave you feeling disinterested and having a hard time really listening to what your crush has to say.
- Repeat the main point or message he said. This way, he knows that you are listening and he can clarify something. Repeat important things he said. For example, you might say, "So you're just getting started with drawing, but you feel like you've been doing it for a long time, huh?" This way, he will feel connected to you because you show your understanding of the important things about him.
- Don't cut it off while chatting. Often times, we are too absorbed in saying something to interrupt him while he is talking. Resist the temptation to talk and wait for him to finish speaking. After that, show your enthusiasm for what he's saying.
- Show empathy. If your crush talks about the difficulties he's going through, make sure you don't underestimate his feelings. You could respond to her story about her failing exams by saying, "I understand why you're upset about having to retake the exam."
Step 3. Show him that you feel comfortable chatting with him
One way to keep the conversation warm and natural is to show how comfortable you are when you talk to him. You can show this by making eye contact, smiling often, laughing, leaning slightly towards him when you speak, and using open body language. Use natural gestures when you speak, and keep your arms open, not folded across your chest.
Tilting your head to one side can also be a great way to show friendliness/cheerfulness when you're talking or flirting
Step 4. Make plans to meet up and take a walk again, and/or ask for her number
If all goes well, ask him if he wants to see you again or ask for his number. This is done right after the conversation has been running for its (before it ends). It's a good idea to ask him to meet again or ask for his number after you've built a strong relationship and before the conversation gets boring. Think of some suitable activities for the two of you to do before you start a conversation. Say, for example, “You are such a fun person! Do you want to meet again later?” After that, suggest some things to do together and ask for her number.
- Or, if you want to play it safe, you can ask, “Oh yeah, may I have your number? I really enjoyed chatting with you.”
- If you feel that the conversation was good, but it still doesn't make you feel completely comfortable, re-do the conversation several times via text or in person before you ask her out or go for a walk.
Step 5. Bring back the topics that have been discussed
You may want to chat with him about something he said earlier in the conversation. For example, you could say, "So, how long do you think it will take to prepare for the midterms?" After that, live the rest of the conversation by talking about the conversation points raised at the beginning of the conversation.
- You can also insert jokes or "flirty" humor about what is being said. For example, you could say, “Finally, after we went through the famine, You opened the cafeteria. I think after this we can overcome the obstacles in life together.”
- Inserting “flirty” or cheesy jokes can strengthen the relationship you make. In addition, cheesy jokes can also keep the relationship going after the first conversation.
Step 6. End the conversation on a positive note
When you're comfortable and have just laughed about something, you can end the conversation politely to make a good impression. Make sure you tell him that you enjoy chatting with him.
- You can end the chat casually. Try saying, for example, "I think I should go home now, but I'm glad I got to talk to you."
- If you are going to see him again in the future, say something about the meeting. Try saying, for example, "I can't wait to see you in class and hear from you about your assignment/exam."
- Send a follow-up message a few days later to say hello and see how he's doing about the things that were previously discussed.
