Whether you're the eldest, middle child, or youngest child, being a good sister requires tolerance, patience, and a willingness to spend time with other siblings. Communication between siblings can strengthen your relationship with your brother, both in joy and sorrow. Of course, sometimes fights happen between siblings, but as long as you approach them in a healthy and mature way, your relationship with your sibling will become even closer and stronger.
Step
Method 1 of 3: Strengthening Relationships with Siblings
Step 1. Communicate with your sibling as often as possible
Regular communication is important in building a close relationship between siblings, whether you live in the same house or in different countries. Try to stay connected with your sibling in any way.
- Text or call your sibling on Facetime once a week if they live far away.
- Invite him to eat with you if you still live near where he lives.
- Send him a message to let him know you're thinking about him.
- Submit a photo that you find funny.
- Give him a card.
Step 2. Spend time together by doing fun activities
When you're together, plan time only for you and your sibling. You can go for a walk or you can stay home and relax together. Do something you love. For example, you can:
- Watch movies together.
- Play a board game or video game.
- Play sports games together.
- Take a walk after dinner.
- Relax on the beach.
- Enjoy dinner at the restaurant.
- Cook together at home.
- Host an arts and crafts evening.
Step 3. Find out what he considers important in his life
You and your sibling may have different tastes, hobbies, and habits, but that doesn't mean you can't have fun with them. Find out what he likes or thinks is important. Ask if you can join him the next time he has an activity he enjoys.
- For example, if your sibling enjoys playing soccer, ask about the next game so you can come over and cheer him on.
- If he enjoys playing video games, ask him to teach you to play his favorite game.
- If he likes a certain band, ask him if he'd like to see that band concert with you.
Step 4. Remember his birthday and certain special moments
This is the easiest and wisest way to show you care. Mark certain dates that your sibling considers important, such as birthdays, wedding dates, or graduation days. Buy cards and small gifts to show that you're still thinking about them.
- Choose a gift that is meaningful to her. For example, if your brother is good at ballet, you can give him a ticket to a ballet show in your city.
- You don't need to give expensive or complicated gifts. In fact, you can even make your own gifts.
Method 2 of 3: Providing Support
Step 1. Provide help when he needs it
Your sibling will feel helped by his sibling's love and help, whether it's for school, work, or personal problems. If he asks for your help, try to be as helpful as you can.
- Don't wait for him to ask for help. If he seems troubled, call or approach him immediately. You can say, “Hey! Is everything okay? Is there anything I can help you with?"
- Sometimes, your sibling doesn't want you to interfere in his work or problems. Respect her decision, but say that you are ready to help her if she ever changes her mind. You can say, “I see. Just let me know if you need my help.”
Step 2. Compliment his best character or aspect
Don't overlook his abilities and accomplishments. Let him know when you feel proud or impressed with him.
- If your brother is feeling insecure about something, lift his soul by giving him a compliment. For example, if your brother doesn't believe he'll be able to graduate and be accepted at the university of his choice, you could say, “You've worked hard! Whatever the outcome, I know you can handle it.”
- Encourage him for his accomplishments. For example, if he wins an award, show that you are proud of him.
- Give an example of the influence or impact of the character or its positive aspects on your life.
- Let him know when you are inspired by what he does. For example, if he keeps trying to do an activity he's been struggling with, let him know that it inspires him to keep trying to do something he finds difficult. Also say that you admire his tenacity.
Step 3. Appreciate something he did for you
When he helps or supports you, show him your gratitude. Let him know that you appreciate his presence in your life.
For example, you could say, “Thank you for always listening to me when I need someone to talk to. I feel happy to have a brother like you.”
Step 4. Be a good listener when he needs someone to talk to
When something happens in your life, you can get help by talking or sharing your concerns with your sibling. Get him to open up to you by opening yourself up first. Show a willingness to share stories and listen to what he has to tell.
- Sometimes, a person just needs a listener, and not advice. Before you share advice, ask him, “Do you need my advice?”. If not, just be a good listener to him.
- Show that you are listening to the story by repeating it from time to time. For example, you might say, "Ah, so your boss ignored you and didn't give you a promotion?"
- Always keep it a secret. An exception to remember is when someone is in danger when a secret is kept.
Step 5. Defend your brother
If he's having trouble with someone, ask what you can do to help him. He may ask you to speak to the person concerned or make a complaint. If he asks you not to interfere, you can still provide him with emotional support by allowing him to come over and talk to you.
If two of your siblings are fighting with each other, try not to side with either side. Instead, demonstrate your role as a mediator to reach a mutually beneficial solution
Method 3 of 3: Keeping the Situation Calm
Step 1. Set limits before problems arise
Don't expect your brother to read your mind. Ask him from the start to respect your space and personal belongings. Talk to him in person or stick a marker.
- For example, if you buy a coffee that is quite special, you may not want other people to drink it. Tell your sibling to ask your permission first before using or drinking your coffee.
- You can also ask him to respect your personal space and free time. Try saying, “When I get home from school, I need to rest by myself for 30 minutes. Please don't disturb me while I'm resting."
Step 2. Handle the problem calmly
If an argument occurs, try to remain calm. Yelling or whining won't help you solve the problem. Speak in a balanced tone of voice, don't accuse or blame him, and focus on solving the problem at hand.
- Speak calmly and stick to the facts. If you start to feel irritated, walk away from him and go to another room to cool off.
- If you encounter a small problem, try to laugh it off and forget about the problem.
- Do not bring up previous conflicts in the fight that occurred. This will only fuel resentment. Focus on current problems.
Step 3. Don't make fun of him on sensitive topics
In family relationships, it's natural for family members to tease or prank each other, but make sure you never discuss or make fun of issues that your sibling considers sensitive. For example, if he's getting defensive about the way he dresses, don't make fun of his style.
Step 4. Learn to compromise
Sometimes, you need to compromise to prevent fights. If your needs or wants conflict with each other, try to find a solution together. Remember that compromise is two-way. You both have to give (as well as take).
For example, if you both spend about 20 minutes in the bathroom and need to use the bathroom at the same time, divide the time by two so that everyone can get half the time to use the bathroom. You don't even have to give up your time
Step 5. Give him the space he needs
Like moments of togetherness, moments of solitude are equally important. If you always spend time with him, there's a good chance he'll get bored. Respect his decision if he needs time to be alone or to work with other friends.
Do not touch or use the items without permission. You are also not allowed to enter his room without his knowledge
Step 6. Don't judge or judge him
Your sibling may live a lifestyle you don't like, but you shouldn't judge or criticize him. Despite your disagreements, try to respect his ability to make his own decisions or choices.
- If you know that certain topics (eg politics or religion) can trigger an argument, don't talk about them.
- If your sibling has a self-harm problem (eg drug abuse or suicidal ideation), encourage him or her to get help.
- Let him make his own choices or decisions. Mistakes that are not life threatening are part of learning and growing up.
Tips
- If you are a brother and your sister often annoys you, think back to yourself when you were his age, including the way you thought and acted, and the things that made you feel happy and comfortable.
- Don't compare yourself to your brother.
- Always love him even though he made a mistake.
- If you and your sibling fight, resolve the issue as soon as possible. The longer you hold a grudge, the faster your relationship with him will be damaged.
- Always remember that your sibling sees you as an example. Make sure you always respect him. He will respect you too.
- Keep in mind that you and your sibling go through different stages of development, and this can affect your relationship with them. For example, puberty can affect your mood and relationships, just as adolescence can make your sister feel closer to her friends than you are.
- If your brother cannot accept your authority, remember that you are still his brother, even if you are 10 years older than him.
- Be prepared to compromise. Even if you feel that it is meaningless, your sibling will always remember your sacrifice, especially when you need something to be sacrificed.
Warning
- Don't lie or make up lies about your brother. If you do, he can avenge your crimes.
- Don't treat your brother as if you are better than him. Feelings of superiority will only make your brother resent you.
