Today, stalking is a fairly common negative event and has the potential to cause serious harm although, unfortunately, it is not taken seriously by most people. In general, a stalker is someone who manifests his attention in "terrible" forms and can make you feel uncomfortable. In many countries (including Indonesia), stalking is illegal and is often accompanied by disruptive and intimidating behavior. If you feel you are being stalked by someone, or if someone's behavior starts to bother you, don't hesitate to take your concern and report it to the authorities immediately. Before doing so, first understand the general characteristics of a stalker and what behaviors are considered odd and should be watched out for.
Part 1 of 3: Recognizing Odd Behavior
Step 1. Be wary of someone who is obsessed with always being in touch with you
A stalker may overwhelm you with calls, text messages, or emails, and come to your house until the behavior feels like it's encroaching on your personal boundaries. Be careful, behavior that feels beyond your norms and comfort limits can be watched out for as seeds for stalking behavior.
Chances are, that person will also try to be your “friend” on various social media, then keep contacting you via text messages and bother you
Step 2. Be on the lookout for someone who won't let go of you
Also, be on the lookout for someone constantly tracking your routine! Someone with stalking tendencies may force you to always invite them to personal events, and/or invite them to meet your closest relatives and friends. In addition, he also always claims to know your daily routine or plans. Of course the presence of such people will disturb your comfort, right?
- If someone claims to know your daily routine, sound the alarm immediately! Remember, there is a very significant difference between being interested in your life and obsessing about your existence.
- If you are already dating someone who has these characteristics, consider ending your relationship immediately!
Step 3. Watch out if he knows more than you tell him
For example, a stalker will not hesitate to search for various information about your personal life, professional life, favorite places, and people closest to you independently. In addition, they can find out the route to and from your office, your workout schedule at the gym, or your other routines.
Chances are, the person will slip their tongue and say something you've never been told. If that happens, you should sound the alarm
Step 4. Identify social awkwardness
A stalker may not be able to identify social behaviors that are, and are not, acceptable to those around him. In other words, they may experience social awkwardness, lack social awareness, and feel "not right" with any social group. For example, they do not understand the right way to interact with other people, or often make assumptions about what other people think of them. Often, they also have little or no personal relationships with other people, and have very low self-esteem.
However, also understand that not everyone who experiences social awkwardness has the seed of a stalker. If the person doesn't appear to be obsessed with you, doesn't threaten your safety and/or safety, and doesn't always try to be around you, it's likely that they just have a hard time socializing with other people
Step 5. Observe how he reacts to your personal boundaries
For example, watch the response when you try to set boundaries such as “please don't talk to me during office hours” or “please don't call me after 9pm, I need some time out.” Most “normal” people will appreciate it, but stalkers won't. In other words, they may ignore the boundaries, try to invade your private territory using other methods (such as spying), or make attempts to intimidate you so that you are afraid to set boundaries again in the future.
Some people who are socially clumsy and/or have developmental disabilities, often have difficulty reading other people's body language. However, unlike stalkers, they can still respect your boundaries and won't try to break them
Step 6. Watch out for sudden visits
Someone with a stalking tendency may suddenly appear in front of you without prior notice. Of course that behavior can be a problem because your free time won't last forever, right? In fact, this behavior should be wary of because it means that the person may not respect your boundaries or privacy.
- Even if the person is acting stupid or doesn't seem aware that their behavior is bothering you, keep your feelings first. Do you feel uncomfortable or threatened, even if only slightly? Did the visit feel a little aggressive or invasive to you?
- Alternatively, you may also run into the person frequently in public. Be careful, this situation may occur because the person in question has memorized your routine and knows when and where he or she can find you.
Step 7. Be aware of a person's tendency to behave aggressively
Most likely, a stalker harbors a desire to have you completely. In other words, if you look or feel withdrawn from him, he will start to be aggressive and intimidating, especially because your actions have stressed him out and made him feel neglected. Be careful, the aggressive attitude is likely to be shown clearly. For example, he will constantly follow or approach you as if to say, "No matter how hard you try, you're not going anywhere."
Step 8. Be aware of other behaviors that have a serious impact on your life
In fact, stalking behavior can take many forms. Follow your instincts! If you feel someone is stalking you, immediately report it to the authorities. In addition, also report if anyone:
- Damage your property.
- Send things via email, like pictures, letters, or other things.
- Visit your home regularly.
- Make a false police report about you.
Step 9. Respond to the stalking behavior
If you feel you are being stalked, respond to the behavior with appropriate action! If there's a person whose appearance you're constantly seeing and their existence begins to feel threatening, make it clear that you're annoyed by their presence and ask them to leave you. Also limit your use of social media and increase your security in various areas: change your home lock, lock windows, change your cell phone number, and change your daily routine. Also, don't travel alone and explain your situation to those closest to you so they can help you whenever needed.
Never confront the person alone! In other words, make sure you always have someone with you, whether it's a friend, relative, or someone else you know well. If necessary, ask the police for help
Part 2 of 3: Understanding the Personal Characteristics of a Stalker
Step 1. Be aware of his delusional tendencies
In fact, many stalkers suffer from delusional disorder. For example, they think of you as their soul mate or as someone who can fulfill their needs or wants. Sometimes, they also think you have a secret that they should know.
It is these delusions that root their stalking behavior, especially since someone who is delusional will believe his assumptions to be true
Step 2. Be aware of the intensity of the aura it emits
Most stalkers will give off an extremely intense aura. For example, when the two of you first met, he's more likely to continue to make intense eye contact with you. While this behavior may impress you or blush at first, sooner or later you will feel threatened or in considerable danger. Be careful, chances are, the person believes that the two of you have a very strong personal bond or are destined to live together.
The same intensity may be transmitted through text messages, regular visits, or other similar ways to get your attention
Step 3. Watch out for his obsessive behavior
In fact, stalkers have a tendency to be obsessive about their victims. For example, they don't want to hear objections, and may be too fixated on a behavior or thought. Generally, they will not realize that these behaviors or thoughts can have a negative influence on the people around them.
Since specific behaviors and thoughts have become their main focus, it's no wonder that stalking will take up the lion's share of their lives afterwards. For example, a stalker may be obsessed with seeing your face every day, or getting used to knowing your next routine
Step 4. Beware of wanting to control
In fact, these feelings can be the seeds of negative stalking behavior! The more the person knows you, the more likely they are to feel superior or in control of you. Generally, he or she will seek as much personal information as possible about you (especially through social media), and will not hesitate to ask for photos or a more specific description of the events you involved. Be careful, that information will be used as a tool to control you in the future!
Sound the alarm if someone keeps asking for the person taking the picture next to you, or scraping information about a specific location that you post on social media
Step 5. Watch out for overly romantic behavior
Generally, stalkers believe that you are the only person worthy of their love. Unfortunately, that romance can transform into obsession and stalking behavior in an instant! Therefore, be wary of people who are not romantically involved with you but are always trying to prove their love or win you over using excessive romantic gestures and behavior. For example, don't be easily fooled if someone is constantly buying you expensive things, willing to travel great distances just to see you, or rushing to confess their love for you.
Part 3 of 3: Identifying the Stalker
Step 1. Understand the general demographics of stalking
In America, stalking has established a specific pattern that, fortunately, you can use as a guide to avoid it. For example, stalking is often perpetrated by someone who is unemployed or has low income, is in the late 30s to 40s, and has good intelligence (at least the perpetrator is a high school and/or university graduate). Another fact, men have a greater tendency to do stalking, although the door may also not be closed to women.
Drug addiction and personality disorders are often rooted in the act of stalking someone
Step 2. Identify if the stalker is someone you know
Oftentimes, the stalker knows his victim well, and one of the most common identities of the perpetrator is that of the victim's former partner. Have you experienced a similar situation? So, how dangerous is the situation? Of course it's very dangerous, especially if your ex-spouse has a history of relationship violence! Be careful, people you know usually already know the places you frequent. As a result, he can appear at any time and endanger the safety of you and those around you.
- If your ex-spouse seems dangerous, raise your concerns with office security and, if necessary, provide the appropriate authorities with a photo of the ex-spouse. Also emphasize the potential danger that may occur to all co-workers by saying, "I'm being chased by dangerous people, here. If he comes to the office, please don't open the door, okay?"
- In some cases, stalking is perpetrated by a former coworker, relative, or friend who harbors hatred and wants to take revenge on you.
Step 3. Identify if the stalker is someone you don't know
Don't underestimate the stalking of a stranger! In fact, you need to be more worried because you don't know the motive behind it, no matter how dangerous the person is. In general, strangers may engage in stalking because they harbor romantic feelings for you, agree or disagree with your political views, suspect you are a celebrity, or feel that you have not been treated well.
If you suspect that someone is stalking you, immediately report the allegation to the police
Step 4. Get help to get rid of the stalker
If you feel that someone is stalking you, seek help immediately! If not stopped, stalking can turn into serious danger for you. Therefore, immediately contact the police or the nearest authorities for help.
If you feel you are being watched by danger, immediately contact the authorities
- If you feel your security is being threatened, immediately, contact emergency services such as the police or other authorities.
- Want to report a stalking event you've experienced? Do not forget to collect complete evidence such as text messages, voice messages, videos, or other evidence that shows that the person is actually stalking or threatening you.
- Learn the laws that apply to stalking in the area where you live. To find out more complete information about the legal snares for stalkers that are generally applicable in Indonesia, try visiting the page: https://www. Hukumonline.com/klinik/detail/cl6686/jerat- Hukum-bagi-stalker-(penguntit)