Have you recently broken up with your boyfriend and are having a hard time getting over him? Or, you guys have broken up for a long time but still can't move on? Breaking up with someone you once loved can be tough, but there are some tactics you can try to get over your ex and move on with your life.
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Method 1 of 2: Dealing with a Recent Breakup
Step 1. Accept reality
You have to be honest with yourself and accept reality. It doesn't matter if you believe it or not, in fact your relationship is over. Don't let yourself hold on to hope. Just accept that you are no longer together. There's no rush, but the sooner reality is accepted, the sooner you can move on with your life.
Maybe the level of difficulty depends on how long you've been dating. If you've been together a long time, it may take some time to accept that you're apart
Step 2. Clear your mind
Don't let the memories weigh you down. Don't hold on to your pain as it can affect those around you. Let out your anger and regret and don't burden yourself with wishful thinking, for example, about what you can do to maintain your relationship. If you find yourself thinking about your ex, do something to get rid of those thoughts. For example, reading a book or watching a movie. If you distract yourself, the memories won't come back very often. This will help you turn over a new leaf when you are ready to date again.
Step 3. Think about the downside
When you are making a list of pros/cons or just thinking about your ex, keep all the negatives in mind about him or her. Remember all the reasons why your relationship doesn't last. Think of all the things he did to hurt your feelings. This will help you see your ex in a new perspective and help you get him out of your mind so you can move on with your life.
Don't think he is the best person you will ever date. Think that many other people are better than you
Step 4. Get rid of anything that reminds you of him
As the relationship progresses, you'll have lots of gifts, photos, and keepsakes that remind you of your ex. Collect all the things that make you think of him, like the T-shirt he likes, or the CD you two listen to together, and keep it aside. This way, you can sort out all your feelings and help get rid of them. Without the presence of things that remind you of your ex, you can begin to move on with your life.
- You may be tempted to throw these items away, but you shouldn't. One day you will be able to look back on these items without feeling any pain. You will feel sad if the items have already been thrown away.
- If you find yourself overthinking these items, pick one that doesn't have to be kept, and throw it away. Tear it off or throw it away. This will help you forget all the memories and help you see things as just things.
Step 5. Disconnect contact
Make sure you never see your ex again. Breaking up with your ex will help get him out of your memory and move on with your life. Delete his cell phone number and never call him. Talking to him will only make the situation worse and his response will only add to the pain, not the cure. Also, delete all of his social media account contacts. Knowing all of your ex's activities will only hurt yourself and foster hope.
- Even if you still want to be friends with him because you still love him, stay away from this in the early stages. Your feelings are new and you shouldn't risk prolonging the liver's recovery process any longer than necessary. You don't want to make things worse for your own good.
- Also try to stay away from former friends. If your friends are the same, make sure your ex isn't around when you hang out. Plus, hanging out with your ex's friends will only remind you of him or her.
Step 6. Talk about your feelings
If you feel really hurt, share it with your friends. Go out, have dinner, and get all feelings out of your body. Talk about your good and bad times. If necessary, cry. Keeping everything under wraps won't help. However, give yourself a time limit. Don't let this phase last too long. You'll have a hard time forgetting it and not being able to move on with your life.
Step 7. Meet new people
Even if you're not ready to date again, traveling and hanging out will take your mind off your ex. One of the reasons you miss your ex is because you feel lonely. Meeting friends of your friends will open a new circle of friends and reduce your loneliness. In addition, you will also feel better because your mood improves and becomes more cheerful.
When you're with these new people, try new activities or go places you've never been before. Do not let you do activities that used to be done with your ex, and keep him in mind all the time
Method 2 of 2: Dealing with a Breakup That Has Been Happening for a Long Time
Step 1. Find a new crush
When you're with your ex, you might not think about dating someone else. However, now you are single and can seduce other people. Go out and hang out with people, and flirt with people you like. Even if you don't want to date the person you're flirting with, re-realizing your attractiveness will help you get over your ex.
If you know some people who have flirted with you, call and ask them to meet. When you were in a relationship, you couldn't return the flirt, but now you can freely respond to anyone's advances
Step 2. Get back on the date
Even if you don't feel like dating anymore, try going out with someone new. Maybe he's not your next boyfriend, but going out and knowing that there's a lot more to it than your ex will help you figure out how to move on with your life. Face this new date with optimism, put your ex out of your mind and focus on your new date. Even if it doesn't work out at first, you'll get better over time.
Step 3. Be open to new relationships
Even if you still miss your ex, be open to a new relationship. Just because a previous relationship fell apart, doesn't mean the next relationship will suffer the same fate. You can mention your ex so your new boyfriend understands the reason for your moody behavior sometimes. Most importantly, don't compare this new boyfriend to your ex. Your relationship will only end badly and it will be unfair to your new boyfriend.
Let your boyfriend meet your friends and family. Watching your new boyfriend interact with your loved ones will help you move away from your ex and into new times with someone else
Step 4. Spark your adventurous spirit
Do something to distract yourself from your ex. Go hiking, visit the ocean, or go skydiving. Trying and forcing yourself to do things and situations will help you remember who you were before dating your ex and help you become a better human being. It will also get you out of your house and your thoughts, helping you move on with your life and make a fresh start without your ex present.
Step 5. Write a letter
Sometimes, you just can't stop thinking about the things you didn't get to say before breaking up. Write a letter to your ex, and share how you feel, why your relationship ended, what you would and would not miss about him or her, and anything else you would like to get out of your chest. However, don't send it. Put it in an envelope and save it. You don't want your ex to feel like you can't go on with your life and still have hope for them, but writing a letter will help you reveal all the things you can never share.
Step 6. Exercise
Sitting and lamenting your grief won't help you get over your ex. Try exercising, either in the fitness center or in the open air. That way, you don't stay at home and can meet other people. In addition, exercise also releases endorphins and relieves stress which will help you forget your ex. In addition, you will be more fit when you meet someone new. Plus, going outside and enjoying nature can help improve your perspective and straighten your mind.
