Everyone is afraid of rejection, but we have to accept the risk of being rejected every now and then to get what we want. Read this article to find out how to ask someone out without losing your confidence and self-esteem.
Step
Method 1 of 3: Making a Plan
Step 1. Find out if the person you want to date is already in a relationship with someone else
That way you won't feel embarrassed or do anything in vain.
Don't ask someone who already has a boyfriend to go on a date. This is rude and unfair to the other person, and makes you look mean
Step 2. Be confident, but be prepared for rejection
Decide in advance what you will say or do if someone rejects you. This is especially important if you are planning on bringing your friends along, as it will reduce the chances of your friendship breaking down.
- Being prepared for rejection will help you to avoid appearing physically defeated in front of others who reject you.
- While you're preparing yourself for the possibility of being rejected, don't let this get in the way of your confidence. Let your confidence grow by accepting the fact that getting rejected isn't the end.
Step 3. Find out what he likes, if you can
This will help you design a beautiful date. If he likes music, find out what music he likes and take him to a concert. If he likes watching movies, then take him to the cinema, and so on.
Step 4. Decide how you will invite her
If you're too shy to ask her out in person, then ask her by text, Facebook message or email.
- Texting is a great option if you're afraid to ask her out in person. That way, you will at least be able to hide your disappointment from others.
- If you've just met her, and don't have her phone number, you should ask her in person, but fear not! Asking someone in person is romantic and it would be great if he accepted.
Method 2 of 3: Asking People You Know
Step 1. Start talking
Starting to talk about casual things will make it easier for you to ask him out and reduce any tension you may be feeling.
- Send a short message asking how he's doing. If you are going to ask him directly, then greet him. Be sure to smile and look him in the eye, as this will show that you are attracted to him.
- Instead of immediately asking him out, first ask what his activities are tomorrow, this weekend, and so on. This will be the start of the conversation so you can ask her out more naturally.
Step 2. Ask him if he wants to go on a date with you
Name an activity you think he will enjoy, based on what you know about it. If you have no idea at all, try these ideas:
- Get some coffee.
- Take dinner or lunch together.
- Ask him if he wants to go to a party with you.
- Invite him to eat ice cream or yogurt.
Step 3. Let him know that you are okay with being rejected
This will eliminate any awkward relationship between the two of you in the future, especially if you plan to bring along a close friend you see regularly. More importantly, it will show that you are confident and mature enough to accept rejection.
Method 3 of 3: Inviting People You Just Met
Step 1. Make eye contact and smile
This shows that you're interested in him, and gives him a chance to get back at you, and shows that he's interested too.
If he averts his eyes or doesn't smile back, then he's not interested. While this may also mean that he's too shy to get back at you, don't give up right away
Step 2. Approach him and introduce yourself if you don't already know each other
Be sure to do it with confidence, even if you're tense. First impressions are very important, and self-confidence is a characteristic that attracts both men and women.
Step 3. Have a casual conversation
You can start this conversation by complimenting her appearance, talking about an event you both attended, or asking something. If you can't find a reason to talk to him, try the following questions:
- Ask him what time it is.
- Ask her hometown.
- Ask him which book he reads.
- Compliment her appearance.
- Talk about the music playing, or whatever else is around you.
Step 4. Ask her out
Once your conversation has started, let him know that you think he's attractive, and would like to get to know him better.
- Invite to meet for coffee, lunch, dinner, and so on. This date is a standard date with a small commitment if you don't make it.
- Don't take her to a movie on a first date, as this won't give you a good chance to get to know each other.
Step 5. Be diplomatic when rejected
If you get rejected, smile and say something like "OK, at least I tried. Nice to meet you!" and leave them. Don't keep bothering him after you've been rejected and "don't" keep asking him after he's been rejected. This will make you seem hopeless, and make him feel uncomfortable.
Tips
- Try dressing up when asking someone out. That way, you will have a greater chance of being accepted, and you will be more confident, so it can be seen from your behavior.
- Know the signs. Some people will be too nice to reject you outright, and will reason that they are busy and can't date. If he says he's busy without trying to change the date, then chances are he's not interested.
