When you're feeling more passionate and stronger than a casual friendship, it may be time to take your relationship to the next level. However, this change must be addressed in a subtle way. So if you are natural, communicate your feelings, and value your friends, you may be able to start the most meaningful relationship of your life.
Step
Method 1 of 3: Determining If You Should Date
Step 1. Think about your friendship position
Do the two of you often chat, hang out together in your spare time, or just get to know each other through other people? There's no single right answer that can show that you can turn a friendship into a romance, but you should think about where you are in your relationship before you start dating. Strong friendships are usually the foundation of a strong relationship. You really get to know your partner and enjoy your time with them. Signs that you are both ready to move on are:
- Willingness to share secrets, dreams and thoughts.
- Communicate frequently and honestly, at least 1-2 times a week.
- Chat quietly and pleasantly whenever you meet.
- Have a few hobbies and ideas that you both love and enjoy.
Step 2. Build mutual trust even if only a little
Support your partner when he is in a difficult situation to show that you care and can be someone who has a positive and strong role in his life. If you can't trust someone with your secrets or problems, you'll never trust them with all your heart. Building trust does take time, but there are ways to make it easier:
- Tell me something about yourself-giving trust is the best way to receive it. Tell me about your family, history, dreams or goals, and your worries or disbelief.
- Be reliable, punctual, and help him when you promise.
Step 3. Ask your friends for their opinion
Ask someone you trust if your friend has special feelings for you. Oftentimes, the other person's perspective can shed light on things you might have overlooked or missed thanks to the romantic images in your brain. Be specific and honest: say, "Do you think he has a crush on someone else?" Wouldn't give advice as helpful as saying, "Do you think we're compatible?".
Make sure the person is reliable and won't divulge this to other friends before pouring it out
Step 4. Don't talk about your past relationships or your crush
You shouldn't be completely secretive about your past relationships as this can be a good way to find out about a person's romantic interests or their past. However, you shouldn't constantly complain about your ex-boyfriend or talk about your compatibility when you were dating, as this will cause someone to think that you are still thinking about your ex-boyfriend.
If your crush is constantly talking about other partners, their crush, or ex-girlfriends, they may not be ready to date you
Step 5. Remember that relationships are not just physical attraction
This is very important when you are trying to find a friend, because dating is certainly more serious than "making out with friends". Romance is not just about sex and physical relationships. A romantic relationship is a meeting of two people in all aspects-emotional, social, and physical. If you just want a friend you can hang out with, you don't have to date her. Don't start a relationship if you don't want to commit to keeping the relationship.
Step 6. Spend some time alone to see if the two of you can make a perfect match
One common scenario is when you like someone in a large group. While there's nothing wrong with that, romantic relationships depend on being able to be alone with someone, not always in a group. Even though you don't have to date, try to find some alone time before deciding if he's the right person to be your boyfriend. You can:
- Ask his help to buy food or drinks for the party.
- Sit across from or beside him at dinner.
- Go on a "casual date," such as playing a sport together, visiting a new bar, or helping with a project or homework.
Method 2 of 3: Starting the Approach
Step 1. Ask yourself if you are willing to sacrifice your friendship while dating someone
Unfortunately, some people just can't go back to being “friends” once someone starts making an approach. Interest exists between the two of you, and one party thinks about the possibilities that could happen and it makes both of you feel awkward. However, that doesn't mean you shouldn't approach it. You just have to be willing to sacrifice your friendship for more-but if being a couple is really important to you, it's a risk you have to take.
Step 2. Use open and romantic body language to show your interest
Body language is often forgotten when flirting, but it's the key to telling someone you're attracted to them. It also helps you see if he feels the same way. While everyone is different, there are some signs that signal general interest and respect:
- Position your shoulders and thighs facing each other.
- Make clear and consistent eye contact.
- Tidy, comb, or play with hair and clothes.
- Imitate patterns of posture or speech.
- Leaning or getting close to each other.
Step 3. Heat the atmosphere with subtle seduction
Before starting your approach, you should see if he would want to have a romantic relationship with you. While you shouldn't overdo it, a gentle approach shows someone that you're interested in moving on to the next stage of the relationship. This is a good way to get him to think about a romantic relationship. As you try to follow these tips, ask yourself how he responds-does he look embarrassed or laugh at him? If so, he may want to continue to be your friend. But if he responds in a similar manner, makes steady eye contact, or makes something romantic without pushing it, you may have found the perfect match. To start flirting:
- Make eye contact and smile. Smiling is a proven and most effective seduction technique.
- Start touching: a simple touch of the hand on the shoulder or upper back, stroking someone's arm, or a longer hug (2-3 seconds) are the most important things to show interest.
- Say a sincere compliment to make him feel confident. Everyone loves to be complimented and compliments show you care about someone. Make compliments specific for added effect – say, “You were really good at yesterday's math test” rather than “You look really smart”.
Step 4. Ask her out on a date
Thinking about asking someone out is not only torturous, it also reduces your chances of starting a relationship. When you're sure you're taking the relationship to the next level, meet him alone and ask him out. Your invitation doesn't have to be extravagant or romantic; You just have to be honest. Any answer is better than no answer at all. Keep this in mind as you muster up the courage to ask her out and say:
- "I like being friends with you, but I want to be more than just friends. Do you want to go on a date with me?”
- "We've become good friends, but I feel something more than friendship. I want to get to know you better. Do you want to go on a date with me?"
- Even something as simple as “Go, let's go, next Thursday!” can work.
- There's no right time to ask someone out, except in a tragedy or a life-changing event. Ask her out on a date!
Step 5. Avoid exaggerated declarations of love, instead use sincere and respectful words
No matter how you feel, saying that "he's the one for you" and "he completes your life" will only drive him away because you're moving from friendship to lovers too soon. Be calm and show respect and sincerity when you speak. Some things you should consider saying are:
- "I care about you and our friendship, and I think we could make a great couple."
- "I'm very happy to know you and I want to get to know you more".
- "You are a great person and I am very happy to be your friend."
Step 6. Accept the answer you get
If he feels the same way, you will start a relationship together. But, if he rejects you, it's time to move on and forget about your feelings for him. Constantly asking her out, begging for a second chance, or ignoring her won't get your friendship back on track.
- If you feel like you can be her friend again, you still need some alone time. Try not to hang out with him for a few weeks and see what happens when you get back. While you shouldn't expect to be his best friend anymore, time can help you get over your feelings and get back to being friends with them.
- However, be aware that some people find it difficult to return to friendship after a romantic relationship. Unfortunately, this is a risk you have to take.
Method 3 of 3: Strengthening Relationships
Step 1. Communicate your expectations early in the relationship
Making friends is a wonderful thing: you know each other's habits, have friends in common, and there's no more awkward feelings. But dating a friend can be awkward if you don't talk about what you're looking for in the relationship. Do you want someone you can casually date, or are you looking for your soulmate? Do you feel like the relationship is going slow, or do you want to pour it all out and see if you two make a great match? This conversation must be lived even though it is not easy.
- Try starting the conversation by expressing your needs, such as, "I know we've been friends for a long time, but I want a lasting relationship."
- Continue with, “What are you looking for in this relationship?” "Can you see progress in our relationship?"
Step 2. Go slow, even if you feel like you're ready to speed things up
Friends usually rush into the early phases of a relationship, getting physical with each other before actually dating. While there's nothing wrong with it, if you're in a hurry and don't talk about it, it's going to be a big problem. Don't try to hide your intimacy and attraction to each other. Instead, use this opportunity to initiate an approach and express your feelings. Trying to avoid kissing or other intimate relationships will cause problems in your relationship later if you are both confused about what just happened.
- If someone is going too fast for you, casually remind them that “our friendship is the most important. We have plenty of time for other things.”
- Just because you're dating, doesn't mean you have to spend every hour together. Keep your distance and don't rush.
- Keep in mind that strong friendships are the foundation of a strong relationship.
Step 3. Spend time with your other friends
No one likes it when a couple is alone and disappears like the earth is swallowed, then appears to hold hands and ignore other people from time to time. It's not just your friends that you will sacrifice, your relationship can also be problematic. If you stop dating, you have alienated your core friends, and shown them that you only care about them to get a boyfriend.
- Make time for group activities and stick to the plans and traditions you had with your friends before dating.
- While you shouldn't hide your relationship, you shouldn't let your relationship affect the rest of your friends. Spend time with them and focus on other friends when you are in a large group.
- Keep the details of your relationship private - you don't have to tell your other friends your "love story." They don't want to hear it and your partner may not want to talk about it like you do.
Step 4. Develop hobbies and activities between the two of you
While you shouldn't ignore old friends, you shouldn't treat your partner the same way now that you're dating. You have to find something that you both like. Chat and spend time alone to make your relationship grow from friendship to something more. If you just want to date someone without trying to love them, you should just stay friends.
Maintaining a relationship takes time, effort, and hard work, but it's worth it
Step 5. Be yourself just as you were when you were just friends
Just because you're a couple now, doesn't mean you have to change yourself to make him love you more. He fell in love with you while still friends. While everyone will change when building a relationship, being someone's boyfriend is not a reason to change personality.
- Your friendship should remain intact regardless of how romantic your relationship is.
- Make sure you are comfortable with him. If you feel like you need new clothes, have foreign language skills, or a new hobby to make him fall in love with you, maybe the two of you are better off being friends.
Step 6. Understand that if your relationship collapses, it will be difficult for you to make friends again
When you get to know someone romantically, it can be very difficult to let those feelings go and become friends again. Dating someone is a core experience, and you will learn a lot, both positive and negative, about someone you never knew. Since you have experienced romantic feelings between the two of you, it will be very difficult, if not impossible, to become friends again. Remember the precious times you both had and move on with your relationship. Know that both of you are doing the best you can to make your relationship work. In the end, this is all you can hope for.
Tips
- Remember that if he rejects you, it doesn't mean your friendship is over. Stay confident and put your mind at ease. Everyone must experience obstacles.
- Do not rush. If you feel confident enough to continue the relationship, do so. But remember that your boyfriend may not feel like now is the right time.
- "I don't want to destroy our friendship" usually means, "I only like you as a friend". If this is true, you need to be close enough to him that if your relationship doesn't work out, you can go back to being his friend.
- Don't overanalyze your friendship for clues. The things you think are important are usually just small things that mean nothing-not secret declarations of love.
