Personality is the collection of patterns - about thoughts, behaviors and feelings - that make up who you are. And guess what? Patterns can change. It has to be tried, but if you really believe in this thought, anything can happen. However, remember that the old personality will radiate outward as usual because our beliefs and thoughts are shaped by life's experiences.
Step
Method 1 of 5: Preparing the Framework
Step 1. Write down your plan
It involves two parts of action: what you want to change and what you want to become. You can't just get one of the two. It is a great effort to achieve it; You must know the struggle you choose before you begin.
- How do you see the contribution of the new character to your development as a human being? Most people at this stage conclude that personality changes are not important, but simply change one small habit that has a negative effect when interacting with others. Is just a small change enough?
- If there is someone you hope to be like him, be clear what you want him to emulate? Don't just look at someone and say "Yeah, I want that." Find out exactly what about him you admire - what is his way of dealing with problems? The way he talks? The way he walks or his movements? More importantly, how did this affect his well-being?
Step 2. Tell someone
Part of the success of anonymous alcohol gatherings is that you can come up with something unusual to talk about and say in public. Having someone hold you accountable will provide real motivation that you won't get any other way.
Talk to a friend what you want to achieve. If he is a trustworthy friend, he will be able to point you in the right direction (he may say you are being unreasonable or keep you on the right path). The extra brain power and eyes that are a bit far from painting, figuratively speaking, will help you to see how you should behave and what impression you give
Step 3. Create a reward system
This can be in any form. "Anything". Can move mounds from one bag to another or a long vacation. Whatever it is, it must be something of value to you.
And also make a list of reviews as you work on them. If you greet a pretty girl and get a greeting back, great. That is something. If, the following week you meet the girl again and get a story, great! Prepare awards for all events; "all" is a challenge
Method 2 of 5: Changing Your Mindset
Step 1. Stop classifying yourself
If you think that you are shy and quiet, you will use that as a reference. Why didn't you go to the party last Friday?…Exactly. You have no excuse. If you stop thinking that you are this or that person, the world will be wide open for you.
You will always change. If you think you are a band addict, you will find that you will embrace those qualities. But if you realize that you will always grow and develop, you will open up inspiring opportunities for growth, opportunities you might have avoided if you thought otherwise
Step 2. Stop thinking "stiff"
Just like naming, stop thinking that is black and white. Men are not scary figures, power is not a bad thing, and textbooks are actually useful. Once you realize that it is your "view" that defines who you are, you will see possibilities and, therefore, make choices about what to do.
Some people have traits that are described as "stiff," and that really determines how they behave. The opposite is "evolving" thinking, where the observer would argue that its nature is malleable and ever-changing. This way of thinking is formed from childhood and can be a big influence in personality. If you think things are "stiff," you won't believe you can change them. What is your view of the world? It can determine how you see yourself in a relationship, how you work through problems, and how quickly you move forward after a setback
Step 3. Get rid of negative thoughts
Stop. The beauty of your brain is that it is a part of you, so you can control it. If you find yourself thinking, "Oh my God, I can't, can't, can't, can't can't," then chances are you can't. When the sound starts to reverberate, plug it in. Because it would be of no use.
- When the voice starts acting up, make it sound like Donald Duck. That will keep you from taking it seriously.
- Keep your head up, literally. Changing your body language will actually change how you feel and ultimately how you think.
Method 3 of 5: Changing Feeling Patterns
Step 1. Fake it until you get used to it
There is a saying from Zen Buddhism that the way out is through the door. If you want to reduce your shyness, practice going up to people and talking to them. If you admire people who love to read, start reading. Do it without a second thought. People give in to bad habits and there are ways to change those habits.
No one needs to know that deep down in your heart you feel that death is near. you know why? Because that feeling will soon go away. The mind has an amazing ability to adapt. What used to give you goosebumps, given enough time, will become meaningless over time
Step 2. Take a new identity
Well, method acting is considered bad, but if Dustin Hoffman does it, maybe you can give it a try. With this method, you will completely become someone else, this new being that you want to be yourself.
Do this 24 hours a week. You must adopt this new character in various situations. How do they sit? What is the position of their faces when resting? What are their worries? How do they spend their time? Who are their neighborhood friends?
Step 3. Take time to panic
Well, suggesting that you leave who you are entirely and adopt a new person through the mere power of thought and habit sounds very strange. There's no way you can do it 24 hours, 7 days a week. Therefore, give yourself time to feel what you want to feel.
If you have a party invitation on Friday that you are very reluctant to attend. Tell yourself on a Friday night or Saturday morning you can take 20 minutes to get really nervous. 20 minutes of absolutely nothing and no sense. But after that, done. And stick to it. You know what will happen? You'll realize that you don't really need that time in the end
Method 4 of 5: Changing Behavior Patterns
Step 1. Immerse yourself in a new environment
Honestly, the only way to see yourself changing is if you add something new to your life. To do this, you must choose new habits, new people and new activities. You can't do the same thing over and over and expect different results.
- Start small. Join a club. Get a job beyond your skill set. Start learning about the material. Furthermore, keep yourself away from the old environment. You don't want to be around people who are doing the opposite of what you want to achieve.
- Train yourself. If you are afraid of spiders, allow yourself to be in the same room with the animal. Day by day the closer you get to it. Eventually, you will dare to sit close to it and even hold it. Continuous recognition will dull the brain from fear. Now take that "spider" and replace it with whatever your goal is.
Step 2. Take notes
You will need intense self-awareness to stay on track. Taking notes will help you to track your thoughts and analyze how you handled these changes. Write down what you're working on and what hasn't worked to improve your methods.
Step 3. Say "Yes"
If you're having a hard time jumping into a new environment, try thinking this way: stop turning down opportunities. If you see signs that your old self didn't like, take another look. If your friend asks you to do something you have absolutely no idea about, accept it. You will be better off because of it.
After what is stated above, take a safe decision. If someone asks you to jump off a cliff don't do it. Use your wits
Method 5 of 5: Adding the Finishing Touches
Step 1. Pay attention to clothing
Yes, clothes don't define a person, but they will help put you in the right frame of mind. While this is not a way to change your personality, it might help remind you of the person you want to be.
You can do this by simply wearing a hat. If there's something that can remind you of a new person, take it with you. You'll find it easier to align yourself by reducing cognitive dissonance
Step 2. Get used to it
Clothing and thought may not be enough. Think about what this new person will do and how he or she will do it. Will he seek social interaction? Avoid social media? Reading The Economist? Whatever it is, do it.
You don't have to do anything big. Even small things can be done. Is she going to wear a pink bag? Does he listen to a certain band? Be that character as detailed as possible
Step 3. Settle in
Now that you've picked up new habits and maybe new friends and routines, you'll probably feel more motivated. The most important thing is to accept yourself, whatever and wherever you are. Be determined and decide that you will stay that way.
Withdrawing yourself psychologically is risky. If you're successful, it may take you some time to get a feel for what "you" really is. Calm down. This feeling will be present as long as you keep the desire to be close to your comfort
Step 4. Reflect on your new personality
Have you achieved it? Is this what you want to achieve? Do other people have a more positive opinion of you because of your different behavior and clothing? Are you willing to sacrifice yourself to be a pseudo-copy of the ideal?
At this stage, some people will decide that they don't need a personality change, but instead accept and want to improve themselves instead of changing their personality completely. However, this decision is your personal choice. Just make sure to make a decision based on the right reasons
Tips
- Don't be frustrated if you don't change right away; this takes time.
- If you think you can't change because of your parents or the people in your life, then change yourself in small ways. Cut down on the habits you don't like and adopt new ones. If your parents ask why, explain to them that you don't have a confidence problem, and that you're just trying to make peace with yourself.
- Change slowly; drastic changes will invite questions in the minds of others. Take it slow and it will come naturally.
- Remember you don't have to be a different person for other people to like you. It's hard to accept you for yourself, especially if you're feeling down, but still love yourself. Only then will the others be the same.
- Start early in the year so that by the middle of the year other people will start seeing the new you.
- Never change yourself just because other people don't like you. If you're a geek, then don't turn into a badass just because they look "cooler." Pay attention to the goth groups in your school. They all got together and laughed at the cool kids and wished that every bullies at school would work for them someday.
- It's better to improve your personality than to try to change it into someone else, so try to focus on the positives and slowly discard the negatives and remember that no one is perfect. So fight as much as you can.
