Many people worry about their popularity in middle school. Middle school can be a difficult time for both boys and girls, who are going through changes in their bodies and emotions, and worrying about what people think of them. But fear not – if you want to be popular in middle school, all you have to do is get attention, be active, socialize, and be your best at being yourself.
Step
Method 1 of 3: Getting Attention
Step 1. Mingle
One of the main keys to being popular is getting people to notice you and want to be around you. To do that, you have to get along. If you're always walking down the halls alone, worrying about the next class, or frowning all through gym class, you're not going to make a good impression and people won't want to be around you. The secret to making people want to be around you is to make them see you laugh and have fun, so they want to spend time with you too.
- When you're hanging out with friends, try to smile and look happy so people know you're enjoying school.
- Even when you're alone in the hallway, smile at people and give people a positive vibe so people want to get to know you.
Step 2. Stand out – for good reason
Having pink Mohawk hair or going to school in just a swimsuit will certainly make you stand out, but maybe you don't want that kind of attention. To stand out in a good way, you have to let people know who you are and think positively when your name is mentioned. Here are some ways to get attention:
- You could be the guy who's always seen carrying a guitar – and really knows how to play it.
- You can laugh a little louder so the people around you can hear it.
- You can stand out with attractive fashion. You can also look unique, for example, dress like a hipster or rock musician, so people can recognize you.
- Maybe you have a very low voice that is very unique. Whatever your uniqueness, don't hide it. Remember you want to be noticed because of something special in you.
Step 3. Join the team
Joining a team and learning to exercise is not only a great way to exercise and feel happier, it's also a great way to meet new people and make yourself known. You don't have to be the star of the soccer team to play sports, have fun and have a good workout after school. Whether your school has a team or you play in a school league, try to play in at least one sport so you're more likely to meet a variety of interesting people.
- In the end you may not like or continue the sport. But if you spent at least a year in middle school exercising, you're much more likely to make friends and open up new social groups.
- Exercising also teaches you teamwork and how to deal with different talents and personalities, which also helps you deal with everyday people and gain skills that can help you become more popular.
Step 4. Join the extracurricular
Joining an extracurricular will also help you meet people, socialize, and become a more interesting person by pursuing what you love. Pick something you really care about, like debate, French, Model UN, or a variety of other subjects, and move on. Be the head of the school extracurricular to advance it while getting to know many other people.
- Don't think joining a club is uncool and akin to a geek. You'll get to know people who will join a club in high school, when they eventually realize that joining a club is a cool thing.
- Joining a club and playing a sport, if you have time for both, will be a great way to meet more people. You may not meet the same people you meet on a sports team.
Step 5. Interested in many things
The more you do, the more people you will know. And the more people you know, the more likely you are to be noticed and people won't show a blank face again when your name is mentioned. You can play soccer, join a drama club, and be a student assistant at the library -- do whatever you find interesting and use those positions to meet new people.
If you only pursue one particular interest, you will be surrounded by the same type of people. The key to being really popular is being able to please a variety of different people
Step 6. Say your opinion in class
You may think that participating or speaking in class isn't cool, and you think it's better to sit at the back of the class and look like you're doing something more important. Instead, you should participate in class, and do your homework so you seem to really understand what you're saying. You don't have to be the teacher's favorite student, or anything like that, but you do have to talk enough so that everyone in the class knows you and likes your words.
Make sure you don't sound like a geek when you talk. Respect others and open your mind as you give your teacher an answer
Method 2 of 3: Make Friends with Many People
Step 1. Be friendly with everyone
If you want to be popular, you have to make an effort to socialize, even if you are a shy person. You don't have to change yourself drastically to learn to be kind to everyone, even if you don't think that person can help improve your social status. The worst thing that can happen to you is that you become a famous sycophant only talking to people who can make you look popular. Be friendly with everyone you meet – this will be to your advantage.
- Whenever you meet someone you know, say hi and give a smile or a wave. You don't have to have much in common with someone to be nice to that person.
- It's not good to treat people like they're in the movies. It might look cool in the movies, but it's actually going to cost you a lot in the long run.
- Be nice to someone. Help them sincerely, not because you think your actions will make them invite you to their birthday party.
Step 2. Show your interest in other people
If you really want to be popular, then you have to show that you really care about other people, regardless of whether they like you or not. You should show your interest in people by trying to be friendly, asking how your friends and acquaintances are doing, and asking about your interests, family, or goals outside of school.
- When you talk to other people, make sure you ask things like "How are you today?" or "Do you have any plans for the weekend?" so they know that you really care about what's going on in their life.
- Listen as much as you speak. If you spend most of your time talking about yourself and the cool things you do, people will lose interest in you.
- You should also ask people for their opinion on different topics, from cakes in the cafeteria to extracurriculars you should take. Asking for opinions shows you care.
Step 3. Make friends with people from different groups
If you really want to be popular in middle school, then you have to make friends not only with popular people, but also with other students at school. If you only talk to the same people because you think it makes you cool, you'll get in trouble in high school, when your new school is filled with new people and you know very few people. Make friends with everyone, whether it's your dorm mates or the kid whose locker is next to yours.
You don't have to be everyone's best friend, but you do have to be able to find people you find interesting and can teach you something without implying it too much
Step 4. Learn to make small talk
Small talk is not something to be underestimated. Mastering this can help you talk to people and put them at ease before going into deeper, more enjoyable conversations. To make small talk, just walk up to someone, say hi, and start talking about your day. Asking small questions can help start a wider conversation and make people more open to you. Here are some things you can say when making small talk:
- “Have you watched World War Z? I think that's really cool – what do you think?"
- "The Algebra exam was really hard, wasn't it? I've been studying all weekend but still can't answer many questions. How about you – did you do something more interesting over the weekend?”
- "How was your match yesterday? Sorry I didn't get to watch it."
- Make sure you're asking something that can't be answered with just a "yes" and "no," but leave room for someone to explain something to you.
Step 5. Make people laugh
Making people laugh is key to socializing and making yourself more popular. If you feel comfortable being a comedian in class, do so. If you prefer to impress people with your clever jokes, that's fine too. And if you're good at annoying people and making them laugh, you can do that too. Don't force your jokes on people, but try to maximize your power to make people laugh.
Pay attention to when people laugh when you talk to them. Remember what you did that made them laugh and do it again next time
Step 6. Learn to laugh at yourself
Learning to laugh at yourself is an important part of being a fun and social person and becoming more popular. People think that popular kids think they're perfect and can't go wrong, but people will like you more if you're cool without taking yourself too seriously. You don't have to lower your self-esteem to learn to laugh at yourself, but you do have to make jokes about your flaws and anxieties to show you're comfortable being who you are.
- Nobody is perfect. If people make jokes about yourself in a conversation, they will appreciate you more.
- If you can't laugh at yourself and are so sensitive that you get really angry when someone laughs at you, then people will think you're no fun.
Method 3 of 3: Be Your Best Self
Step 1. Take care of appearance
You don't have to be a girl who always wears makeup, or a guy who always wears the latest shoes or jeans just to be popular and get attention. But you have to pay attention to your appearance so that your clothes and body look clean, your face is not greasy, and gives a positive impression to people who see you.
Girls shouldn't wear makeup just because their friends are using it, especially if they feel uncomfortable with it
Step 2. Be confident
Even if you can't be confident overnight, you can try to be more confident – happier with yourself, what you do, and how you look. Try to think of your best qualities over your bad ones, and act as if you are happy and feel like you deserve to be in your position. You can pretend to do it until you can do it comfortably. Even if you don't feel confident, acting like you're confident will make people respect you more.
- Have a posture that emphasizes self-confidence. Stand up straight, and look forward – don't look down.
- Make eye contact when talking to people. This will show them that you are not afraid of social interactions.
- Don't badmouth yourself just to get attention. This will make others think you don't value yourself.
Step 3. Don't copy
If you want to be noticed, you have to have your own style, be it your appearance or your perspective on life. You don't have to be "weird" or do something you don't like to be different. Show your uniqueness and the thoughts and actions that make you special. People will notice you if you just be yourself, not just going along with it.
- Don't dress like other people just to get accepted into a group. Find a style that matches your personality.
- You don't have to like the same music as everyone else to be popular. You will be more appreciated if you listen to music that you really like and share it with others.
- Don't be afraid to voice your opinion in class even if it doesn't agree with everyone's opinion. Your unique mind will make people notice you.
Step 4. Have an edge at something
Another way to get people to notice you is to have an edge in an area, whether it's the best English in class or being the best goalkeeper in school history. Don't think that loving something is "not cool," but work hard to fight for it.
- Having an edge at something will not only make people pay attention to you, but it will also build your character.
- If you keep yourself busy with something you really enjoy, you're less likely to care what people think, and you're more likely to meet new friends.
- Having an edge in an area will also make you a more dynamic and easy-to-talk person, so people will like you more if you talk about something you enjoy-as long as you don't brag.
Step 5. Stop thinking what people think
It may seem impossible to stop thinking about what people think in middle school, when most people spend most of their time talking and gossiping about other people and worrying about their appearance. It's a natural thing when you're growing, both mentally and physically, as an individual and you don't really know your position in society yet.
- If you realize that you're not the only person feeling insecure or wondering what other people think of you, chances are you won't really care.
- Focus on doing what makes you happy instead of worrying about how people will react when you do it.
- If you spend yourself doing whatever you think will make people like you more, you will never be satisfied.
- When you walk into a room, stand tall and proud of yourself instead of looking in the mirror every two seconds, adjusting your clothes, and worrying about what people think of you.
Step 6. Understand that what you are dealing with is SMP
Your popularity won't matter when you enter high school. Even the more popular you are, some people will not even like you because of the common notion of "popular people." You'll only be known until grade 8, so don't let this bother you. Be kind and make friends with those who mean a lot to you. What's the point of being popular and not being liked by anyone? Currently only in junior high school, the problem of popularity is one of the easiest problems for you to deal with compared to your future problems.
In fact, there are many studies that suggest that students who are not popular in middle school will become successful adults. If you don't consider yourself popular, understand that the situation will only get better in the future - while the popular students you know may already be at their peak
Tips
- Be unique and spontaneous to get people interested in you, but don't go around school telling weird things like unicorns, bums, cakes, and other weird things. Not everyone can be Luna Lovegood, but if that's your nature, do it!
- Don't brag about yourself.
- You don't have to be part of a popular group to be popular; just because someone is an athlete or cheerleader, doesn't mean they are popular. There were popular people from other groups as well.
- Don't be mean to other people, friends, teachers and other adults. Being mean and annoying will only make people lose interest in you. If someone makes an arrogant comment, answer it calmly, and end it firmly, but don't insult them, say it smart and funny.
- Knowing your face and body shape can help you find the right outfit or haircut.
- Be yourself, not someone else. Don't change yourself to be like everyone else.
- Don't hang out with only friends of the same gender as you. Make friends with some of your opposite sex.
- Don't mind the people who say bad things to you; they are just wasting your time. Not only that, however there is not any the thing that irritates them more than your indifference to their opinion.
- See what styles are trending at school and add your own twist to make it different. Experiment with your creativity and create your own trend! Nobody likes copycats.
- The ability to draw (especially manga) is a weapon to get people noticed.
- See other people sitting alone at the back of the class? Invite them to sit with you at lunch!
- Don't gossip or insult other people. That way, you won't be liked by everyone.
Warning
- Don't make someone feel sad to be themselves. People will know what you're doing right away, and no one likes to play with someone who likes to make other people sad.
- Don't let popularity take over your life. You are who you are, and nothing can change that. Be happy with who you are now, and don't obsess over being someone you're not.
- Don't give in to peer pressure, especially when it comes to things like drugs and alcohol. Someone who forces you to be like them or do things you shouldn't do is not a good friend.
- Avoid profanity; people will think that you like to gossip about other people.
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Don't leave your friends when you want to be popular. Your old friends will be with you forever, as long as you play with them or talk to them often, which is why your popular friends may not want to hang out with you anymore.
If someone is constantly bullying you, report it to your parents, teachers, or an adult you trust. No one has the right to order/gossip/hurt someone