Entering high school can be a huge challenge. You're in a school where everyone seems convinced of what they're doing and the way they're doing it. To be honest, everyone was a little unsure in high school. However, you can find a suitable place and a good group of friends to spend your high school days with.
Step
Part 1 of 3: Finding Friendship Groups
Step 1. Start early
Most high schools hold an orientation period. At that time, you can visit the school. During orientation, try talking to other people to see if you share the same interests.
For example, you could say, “Hi, I'm Budi. You study here too? I want to join the band, how about you?”
Step 2. Join extracurriculars
Most high schools have a variety of extracurriculars and activities that you can take part in based on your interests. The best thing about taking extracurriculars is that you get to meet other teens with similar interests. That could be the topic of your conversation.
- For example, maybe you want to join a speech or arts extracurricular, or want to be part of a marching band or choir. You'll meet other teens who enjoy art or music just as much as you do.
- If you can't find an extracurricular you like, ask the administration about how to start an extracurricular about something you're passionate about. Just make sure the extracurricular is appropriate at school before asking. You may also need a teacher to support it.
Step 3. Make sure you meet the same person
The more often you meet the same group, the more familiar you will be to the group. Over time, you will start to get to know and get closer to the people in the group. Try sitting with the same group at lunch. The group can be people who sit close to you in class or people who are in the same extracurricular as you.
Step 4. Keep in touch with old friends
Some students may continue high school from the same middle school as you. Try meeting up with old friends, even with friends you weren't very close to. You may find that you two have more in common now that you are in high school.
When you see an old friend in the hallway, make sure you greet them. Invite him out or ask if you can do homework together to reminisce about the past
Part 2 of 3: Make friends
Step 1. Introduce yourself
People won't know you if you don't talk. Don't be afraid to introduce yourself, speak in class, or during meetings.
Start by greeting those near you in class before the bell rings. You can say, “Hi, I'm Tini. I'm really excited for the first day of school, but nervous too. How about you?"
Step 2. Try hanging out with people you like
When you find people you like, ask if you can join them. For example, if you meet a classmate at lunch, ask if you can sit with them.
For example, you might say, “Hey, we were in the same class in math class. Can I sit here or not?"
Step 3. Tell people what you like about them
People love to hear good things about themselves. When you compliment someone, you will have the opportunity to chat with them. It makes you both feel good.
The best compliments are specific. For example, instead of saying, "You look like you're smart," you could say, "You're really good at understanding what Mr. Amir is saying in math class. Just like a math god!"
Step 4. Talk to other youth
One way to make friends with someone is to study the person. You can do this by getting the person to talk about themselves. People love to talk about themselves, so ask questions to get them started. For example, ask their favorite subjects or what activities they usually do outside of school.
For example, you could ask, "So, what do you usually do when you want to have fun?" Or, “Do you have a favorite game or not?”
Step 5. Show kindness
One proven way to make friends is to be nice to everyone. You like it when people are nice, don't you? So do other people. Try bringing a snack to share with a new friend or helping someone pick up her book when she drops it in the hallway. Such seemingly trivial acts of kindness can go a long way in helping you build friendships and compatibility.
Step 6. Accept other people as they are
Just as you want to blend in, so do other people. Sometimes it's tempting to exclude people who don't look like us, but that means we're doing something we want other people to avoid. In other words, you are making the problem worse. Nothing is perfect. You have to accept people as they are.
That doesn't mean you have to be friends with people who are mean or bullying. Instead, it means you shouldn't exclude someone from being your friend just because you think they're weird
Part 3 of 3: Moving Towards Compatibility
Step 1. Try to be part of the group, rather than just blending in
Blending means that you want to be like other people in order to make friends. In high school (and as an adult), it might be tempting. It's easier to hide a part of yourself than to be yourself and risk being kicked out of the group. However, living without being yourself will eventually make you feel worse. Plus, letting your personality stand out will help you find people who are similar to you and form a strong group of friends.
“Merging” often means you have to change yourself so you don't get overlooked in the group. “A match” indicates the group actively wants you to stay in it
Step 2. Embrace the differences
Everyone is unique and has a unique set of thoughts, ideas, and feelings. Yes, you are different from other people. What does the difference mean if you want to blend in? This could mean embracing those differences and finding others who are willing to embrace those differences as well.
Step 3. Be patient
Sometimes it takes time to find a suitable group. You may feel lonely for a while. However, if you keep trying, hopefully you will find a group of people who care about you.
In the meantime, keep doing what you love and join groups that interest you. Keep greeting people in class
Step 4. Form groups of friends, not gangs
Maybe you've formed a group of friends in a music group because you have the same interests. That's a typical group of friends. Other times, groups of friends may form because they share common values, such as religion, and you welcome anyone who wants to join. On the other hand, gangs encourage conformity and often focus on being the most popular or up-to-date. The problem with gangs is that their members knowingly exclude people. It makes others feel neglected.
