The term “little humans” or our childhood selves is used to describe childhood memories that are still stored in the subconscious mind until we are adults and continue to interact in everyday life, even when we remember past events. Restoring a relationship with a “little human” can help with emotional problems triggered by a lack of self-respect or a traumatic experience as a child. The “little man” is a source of vitality and creativity, but as adults, many people lose this ability due to various stresses. In order to overcome this problem, try to accept and restore the relationship with the “little people” who play an important role in your life.
Step
Part 1 of 3: Getting to Know the “Little Man” Within You
Step 1. Restore your relationship with your “little human” or childhood self
One way to rekindle your relationship with the “little human” is to take a “time trip” back to childhood, for example by writing down all the things in your childhood that made you feel happy. Reflect on the sweet memories while reminiscing on how wonderful your childhood was. In addition, you can do various fun childhood activities, for example:
- Sports: football, futsal, basketball, volleyball, etc.
- Explore the forest or have a picnic while enjoying delicious food.
- Wearing cartoon character costumes while drinking tea with friends or pretending to be a pirate while playing music.
- Coloring pictures that children or adults like.
- Indulge yourself by enjoying childhood foods, for example: favorite cereals, mom's cooking, or favorite snacks.
Step 2. Get to know the “little man” specifically
Although everyone goes through a different childhood, many people share the same pattern. If your relationship with the “little human” has been strained for years, determine the stage of childhood development you have reached now as a basis for determining how to accept the “little human” back into your life at this time. There are several “little human” traits and one of them may be very close to yours:
- Children who feel neglected because their parents are divorced or are too busy to pay attention to their children. In more severe cases, the child is abused or neglected so that he is always afraid of being left behind and feels lonely or insecure.
- A cheerful child is a healthy child, but this aspect tends to be neglected as an adult. A cheerful person is always happy and free from guilt or anxiety.
- Children who are always afraid because they were young are often criticized and feel anxious when they don't get recognition.
Step 3. Write a letter to the “little man”
Apologize for ignoring him and let him know that you want to restore the relationship or simply convey your desire to deepen the friendship.
Make a letter according to the nature of "little humans". If he's a "fearful little kid," give him reassurance and allay his fears. If he's "worried about being abandoned," let him know that you'll always be there for him. If he's a "joyful kid," say that you appreciate his always happy nature
Step 4. Give it some leeway
“Little humans” tend to be so irritable that they need to feel safe and comfortable before showing off. Many people hide or deny the existence of the “little human” within them because they are afraid of being seen as weak. Be nice and give affirmations so that he will show himself. Speak gently to him as you would a loved one who feels confident that you will protect him.
Sit in a quiet place and say that you want to get to know him better, want to chat with him, and hope he feels safe. As strange as it may sound, this method helps you get to know a different side of yourself and access your subconscious mind
Step 5. Pay attention to how you feel
Start interacting by paying attention to the feelings that arise in everyday life. These feelings have to do with pleasurable or painful experiences when you were younger and impressionable. The fears, insecurities, joys, and admiration experienced as a child will usually be revealed through emotional patterns as adults.
Communicate with yourself throughout the day by asking, “How am I feeling right now?” then name the feeling
Step 6. Beware of the habit of self-criticism
One of the main obstacles when it comes to paying attention and fulfilling “little human” desires is an inner voice that criticizes yourself by telling you that you are too old to be happy or act like a child.
- The habit of self-criticism is usually formed since childhood as a reaction to "little humans" who feel oppressed. Appreciate inner criticism as the part of yourself in childhood that was let down or hurt, but reject negative inner voices.
- Respond to inner criticism by saying: “I understand why I'm being criticized and I know you feel hurt. I'm always ready to help."
- Say it in another sentence: “Even though it sounds stupid, this is what I have to do now. Please give me a chance.”
Part 2 of 3: Restoring the “Little Man”
Step 1. Respond to the “little man” wholeheartedly
Maybe you want to ignore the "little man" because the issues he or she is facing don't seem relevant to your current life as an adult. That way is wrong because he is the one who brings all the deepest feelings into the present life. So, never underestimate or ignore the "little man" because he can not be taken lightly.
Listen to him talk as if there was a child in front of you because he is real and his feelings play an important role in your life
Step 2. Accept how he feels
Maybe you're frustrated because you've been holding on to anger or insecurities for so long. Give yourself a chance to feel the energy of the emotion because it is talking to you.
The “little man” can throw a tantrum or show sadness. Try to accept the emotion, but don't give up. Acknowledge its existence and then let it pass without letting it dictate your actions
Step 3. Recover through parenting reshaping techniques
This technique is based on the idea that as an adult, you already have the knowledge and ability to provide what a “little human” needs. If he needs to be restored before showing his best aspects, do this to the best of your ability. You know best what he needs and how to help him based on past painful experiences.
- For example: if you never get a birthday present from your parents, give it to yourself. Invite friends and explain that you are hosting this event to remember your childhood.
- Another example: affirm yourself when you have accomplished something you are proud of by saying: "I am proud of myself and my accomplishments."
Step 4. Protect the “little man” within you
Even if you don't want to be carried away by childhood fears, try to feel what he wants. Appreciate her wishes if there are still unresolved concerns. Maybe you are still afraid of heights that you experienced as a child. Accept the fact that you are not ready to practice diving or rock climbing.
Stay away from negative situations. Limit interactions with people who display childhood anxiety. For example: if your sibling often taunts and insults you, don't talk to him unnecessarily
Step 5. Tidy up your home
Create a home atmosphere that reawakens childhood joy. Changes in the environment can change feelings. Decorate your daily life with spontaneity and creativity like a child. Research shows that small changes, such as changing colors, can affect mood. Put your favorite things in a certain place, for example: arrange trophies in the glass cabinet or put your favorite souvenir in a jacket pocket. Find photos of you and your family and display them in your home. Spruce up the walls of the house by repainting or installing beautiful art.
Part 3 of 3: Enjoying Yourself
Step 1. Play hide and seek
If you have children or nephews, invite them to play. Involve adults too to make the game more fun. The psychological theory that underlies the game of hide and seek says that this game is one way of giving life affirmations that is done by seeking and feeling loved.
Step 2. Enjoy playing the trampoline
You can buy, borrow, or rent some trampolines and then invite your friends to play. Physical activity is a way to reduce stress and the experience of jumping around reminds you of the joys of childhood.
Step 3. Use your fingers to paint, use colored pencils to draw, or buy a picture book to color
These activities help you bring back your childhood creativity. In addition to coloring existing objects, you are free to draw anything related to emotional life. Research shows that drawing can be a means of expressing emotions for children, even if they don't realize this like adults do. Drawing and creating visual art creations help “little humans” express themselves.
Step 4. Have a dance party
Apart from relieving stress, dancing and other physical activities are also creative ways to express yourself regardless of age. Many people like to dance, children to adults. If you enjoy dancing, use this activity to connect with “little humans” in a way that respects your wants and interests as an adult.
Don't forget to play the song you loved as a kid
Step 5. Make a free essay or free picture
Take this opportunity to rest your conscious mind while the other side of you takes over. It's a fun source of creativity, especially if you let the "little man" express himself as he pleases.
Use crayons, colored pencils, or colored paper to make it more fun
Tips
- If you have children, try to see everyday life from their perspective. If you're having fun with them, be cheerful.
- You can be happy anywhere. Write down tasks and other work that you enjoyed completing as if you were playing to reconnect with your childhood self.
Warning
- Avoid people who see immaturity as something to be ashamed of. Maybe it's because they're used to being overly self-critical and don't realize the importance of having a “little human” within them.
- Don't be so childish that you neglect your responsibilities as an adult. Find balance.
