To successfully live life, you need hard work. You will meet failure, loss of relationships, heartache, and physical pain. However, when you shift your mindset to accept change, build a positive outlook, and place an important emphasis on relationships, not only will you "succeed" in life, but your life will have the "upper side".
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Method 1 of 4: Accepting Changes
Step 1. Accept the inevitable change
Nothing is fixed. Seasons, weather, fashion trends, technology, these things are constantly changing. Know that nothing is permanent. If you're having trouble, it won't stay that way either. On the other hand, if your life right now is great, be grateful, but know that the hard days are coming.
One way to stop seeing change as a “bad” thing is to realize that you and everyone you meet is changing. Whether you met him the day before or a week ago, every time you meet someone, you are actually meeting their updated, changed version. Time keeps running. They find a lot of experience, think of new ideas. Man is not permanent, and so is life
Step 2. Set realistic expectations
If your expectations are too high and unrealistic, you will continue to live in disappointment. If things are too rigid, you are leaving no room for growth or change. With more reasonable expectations, you have greater self-confidence and become more equipped to deal with whatever comes your way.
- An example of an unrealistic expectation would be: “I want to get A's in all my courses”, while a more realistic expectation would be: “I will try to do my best in college”.
- You can improve how you manage expectations by regularly reassessing what you can achieve, and exploring a range of options, rather than focusing on just one outcome.
- If someone else has unrealistic expectations for you, talk to that person and explain that doing so will be difficult for you. You could say, for example, “If you expected this kind of result from me, I would definitely be _”.
Step 3. Learn from your experience
Learning from experience is by doing firsthand, or through discovery and exploration. In the process of teaching and learning, you can present facts to students and they are likely to forget. You can actively teach the gist of it and they will remember it. But if you engage them and let them experience the subject firsthand, they will learn. Students engaged in experiential learning will follow these six steps (this same procedure can also be applied outside the classroom):
- experiencing/traveling: In this case, this step is actually a process of life itself and accumulating experience.
- sharing/reflecting: Discuss your reactions and observations about a particular life experience with a friend, counselor, or jot it down in a journal, thinking about what happened and what you found).
- process/analyze: Determine what is important about a particular life experience. What's the problem? How to solve this problem? Is this a recurring problem?
- generalize: Connect one experience to another to find patterns. Find out if there is a principle of life in it.
- apply: Decide how you will apply what you learn from that one experience to other similar or different situations.
Step 4. Allow yourself to live in the present moment
Try not to focus too much on the future, and not dwell on the past. Both make you miss things that are happening right now.
- To live in the present moment, engage self-awareness. Self-awareness can be done at any time or anywhere. It means the act of focusing on what is happening in the here and now.
- If you are a beginner, self-awareness meditation can be done by sitting on a comfortable bench. Place your hands in a cupped position on your thighs. Focus your gaze about 1-2 meters or on the wall in front of you.
- Take a deep breath. Sit down and orient yourself to your current environment. Pay attention to any sounds, smells, or sensations you feel on your skin. Keep breathing and direct your attention to your breath as you inhale and exhale.
- If you find yourself stuck in your thoughts, just acknowledge the fact that you're thinking, then return your attention to your breath. Do this exercise for 20-30 minutes every day. With practice, you can do self-awareness meditation wherever you are.
Method 2 of 4: Building a Positive Outlook
Step 1. Take advantage of the power of optimism, and decide to be optimistic
It's about your attitude, not your abilities. It is this attitude that determines your improvement or progress. In other words, how high or far your life moves has a lot to do with how you view life, situations, and people. Taking a positive attitude can improve your physical and mental health, as well as extend your life.
Step 2. Identify your negative thoughts
Optimism can be yours simply by changing what you say about yourself. In the process of trying to think more positively, you must be aware of your own negative words.
- Take a piece of paper and fold it in half. On the left, write down all the limitations and negative beliefs you have in your mind. These include “my life is terrible” or “I won't find anyone I can love.”
- After a few days, "listen" to your thoughts. Pay attention to anything that makes you feel bad or negative and add them to your list.
Step 3. Fight these unwholesome thoughts
Negative beliefs can seriously drain our hope. However, when we really examine these beliefs, you will realize that they all make no sense. For each self-defeating belief you write about, ask yourself these questions to counter it:
- Can I support this belief in a reasonable way? For example, because you can't predict the future, you really can't reasonably say you won't find the person you love.
- What evidence exists that proves this belief false? Have you ever loved someone in the past?
- Is there any evidence that this belief is true? Again, you cannot predict the future.
- What is the worst thing that could happen if this “bad” situation happened? If this is indeed the case, surely you are now a lonely person without anyone.
- What kind of good things would happen if this “bad” situation happened? You can learn to love yourself and live your passion in life.
Step 4. Create positive reinforcement
Reinforcement is positive and helpful words that describe the desired goal and continue to make an impression on the subconscious mind. Take the folded piece of paper, and on the right side, write down an affirmation that turns the negative writing or belief in one's limitations into a positive, transforming belief. Repeat this statement regularly.
- “My life is bad” changed to “My life right now may be bad, but hardships made me a stronger person”.
- “I will never find the one I love” changed to “Now I feel lonely, but this situation will end”.
Step 5. Practice thanksgiving
Grateful thoughts can help you build a more positive outlook. Instead of continuing to sink into your burdens, focus on the good things for which you are grateful. Grateful people have healthier physical conditions, healthier psychological states, better levels of empathy, lower levels of aggression, better sleep quality, higher self-esteem, and the possibility to build stronger friendships. new. Show more gratitude by:
- Write it down. Start writing a gratitude journal.
- Let the other person know when you value something in him or her.
- Meditate focusing on the spirit of giving thanks.
Step 6. Shift your perspective
Sometimes, we are very caught up in the crisis of our life. This “stuck” condition can prevent us from seeing the situation objectively, and therefore, look for possible solutions. Often times, we get carried away in drama. Take a step back and look at your life from someone else's lens.
Imagine the situation that happened to you happened to your coworker or best friend. What advice would you give this person in dealing with this situation? Have you noticed any negative thoughts or unrealistic expectations?
Method 3 of 4: Focusing on Relationships
Step 1. Surround yourself with positive people
Surrounded by positive people will give birth to positive things in you. No matter what's going on in your life, a support group can help you stay steadfast and hopeful. When you are surrounded by people who have a positive outlook, this will increase your chances of being happy and successful.
- Look for positive influences in your life. These are people who are grateful and actively seek joy in everyday life.
- Stop the relationship or keep a distance from those who are a negative influence. These people are those who are immersed in problems or burdens in their lives. They often don't laugh or smile, and their bad mood can rub off on you.
Step 2. Build your spiritual life
If you believe there is a purpose in life, a higher purpose, building a spiritual life can provide a safety factor that shelters you through difficult times.
- Individuals who describe themselves as religious or spiritual often have healthier life choices in terms of eating, avoiding risky behavior, not smoking, drinking alcohol, or using drugs. More than that, the spiritual life also provides you with a social support system for us and helps to release stress.
- Spiritual life need not always be related to a particular religion or philosophy. It can mean whatever meaning you want. Build your spiritual life by practicing forgiveness, personal meditation, getting in touch with nature and art as a process of connecting with the Almighty, and being compassionate.
Step 3. Contribute to helping others
Connecting with others can have a positive impact on both sides if done through a charitable/non-profit channel. Helping others can increase satisfaction in our lives, give us purpose in life, increase our sense of personal accomplishment, reduce stress, and improve our mood.
Not sure how you can help? Here are some ideas to consider: babysit the neighbor's child whose parents are often left behind, teach your young cousin to play music, volunteer at the local soup kitchen, donate toys to children in need
Step 4. Ask for help when you need it
Living life is made easier if you know when and how to ask for help when you need it. Asking others for help can strengthen relationships as well as help another person or family member feel more competent. We often mistakenly assume that asking for help makes us look weak, or demeaned by others who will help.
- Think about some of the tasks that could actually be done with the help of an assistant.
- Think of the help of others you have experienced in the past.
- Match your particular needs or interests with those who have provided help. For example, if you have a friend who loves to cook, and you could use her help planning a party, she might be more than happy to help.
- Finally, state directly what you want to say. Requests for help often cannot be fulfilled if the meaning seems ambiguous (unclear, can be interpreted into various meanings). For example, you are more likely to get help if you ask by saying, “Can you help my kids go out to play every Saturday morning?” and not, “Can you help me take the kids out to play sometime?”
Method 4 of 4: Taking Care of Yourself
Step 1. Exercise regularly
Adopting a habit of regular physical activity can have a tremendous impact on your life. Doing the basics can increase your energy, help you have a positive outlook, help you control your weight and fight disease, and increase your lifespan.
Find one or more activities that interest you and enable you to live your life, including jogging, attending a fitness class, rowing a boat, or climbing a mountain
Step 2. Eat a healthy diet
Eating a balanced diet by eating nutritious foods can help you feel great and keep your body functioning optimally. Choose foods from each food group, including vegetables, fruits, protein, dairy, and whole grains.
Be careful about enjoying certain foods, such as fast food or sugary foods
Step 3. Get enough sleep
Sleep for 7-9 hours every night to get maximum health conditions. If you are not consistent with good quality (and quantity) of sleep, you are more likely to have accidents, be less able to fight disease, and more likely to make unhealthy decisions, such as eating fast food late at night. Make sleep a top priority to build better physical, mental, and emotional health.
Step 4. Do various self-care activities more often
Self-care activities are activities that nourish your spirit and soul. These activities can improve your mood, help reduce stress, and give you the resilience you need to get through difficult situations.
Think of an activity that you would definitely enjoy as this will help regain your spirits. You may like bubble baths or nail care. Maybe you like going to the park and taking walks and enjoying the nature around you. Whatever activity refreshes your spirit and soul, make time to do it
Warning
- If life feels too heavy or hopeless, and you no longer feel like you can live it on your own, seek help. Reach out to a friend or loved one for support and reinforcement.
- If you feel depressed, contact the nearest mental health professional immediately.
