So, you've found the right woman for you to spend the rest of your life with. How do you ask it to be yours – forever? You have to put your nerves aside and remember that, once you have a game plan and know what to expect, you'll be able to propose to your boyfriend without saying everything. You don't have to overdo something or go crazy, unless you think that's what he wants. What matters is that you speak from the heart, and that you find the perfect way to make him realize how much he means to you. If you want to know how to propose to a woman, take a look at Step 1 to get started. Be sure to do it in a romantic or public place so that he says yes, not no! But remember to ask her parents if you can marry her, otherwise they won't like you!
Step
Step 1. Make sure she's the right woman
You've probably been thinking about this for a long time. The important thing is to know that you love him and think of him as the "only woman". Write down or think of a list of all the reasons that made you want to marry him. This is very important to convey your love for him at the time of proposing, as well as to convince yourself that you made the right decision. When you see your boyfriend, you feel that you really want to spend the rest of your life with him, and the time is right for you to tell him that.
- Even though they say, "When you know it, you know it," it's a bit confusing. The important thing is that you propose to her because you really want to. It's not that he's already hinted at you marrying him and you don't want to let him down just because you think you've been with him long enough and it's time to do something about it. Not because everyone around you is engaged. And "certainly" not because your friends, pastors, and family members keep urging you to propose.
- Many people believe that you have to move in with your girlfriend for a few months or so before you can be sure that she is the only woman. You may like him from a distance, but when you share a bed, daily necessities, and expenses together, you may see a side of him that isn't quite what you imagined. Of course, you don't have to do this, but it's a way to "check" that you're ready to spend the rest of your life with him.
- It's helpful to talk about this with a close friend or family member, as long as you're sure that person won't reveal your secret. Avoid discussing your plans with too many people as he could find out through rumors.
Step 2. Be absolutely sure that he will say yes
While it's impossible to predict 100% that he will say yes to you, you have to believe that your boyfriend loves you and wants to spend the rest of his life with you. Pay attention if he gives hints that he wants to get married (to you), that he wants to live with you, have kids, make you part of his family, etc. If he never mentions these things, then you can try having a conversation with him to find out how he feels; If he's uncomfortable or avoiding your questions, he may not be ready for marriage.
- If you've only been together a few months, make sure that he's ready for a long-term commitment. While many happily married couples get engaged after only a few months together, spending more time with your sweetheart to make sure you're the right match for each other, you can be sure that he or she will say yes.
- While you might be nervous trying to figure out his feelings if you're not sure, it can save you some embarrassment when proposing if you find out he's not ready.
Step 3. If the parents are old fashioned and your partner doesn't feel offended or sexist, you can ask their parents for permission to propose
Although asking permission from a father is considered ancient, this tradition has not disappeared completely as it is a sign that you respect him and his family and that you will always involve his family. It is also a sign of friendliness, and which family could resist it? But again, it really depends on him and his family's condition, so try to find out.
- Put him first – is this something important to him and his family? Or something that might frighten him? Or maybe he was shunned by his family. Find out about his current condition and better things to do. You should know it well.
- Another modern twist when asking your parents for permission is after you propose. This is another way of making sure that your future wife is the first person you ask for permission, but she realizes that you still intend to ask your family for permission; this can also be a good reason to come along and tell the news. Some people think it's the other way around but it's still a sign of respect, and really, it's all up to you.
- If it is not possible to ask permission from his father, ask permission from his mother.
Step 4. Determine the time to apply
It is very important to determine the right time, and choosing the right time is the only thing you can work on. It's impossible to say that there's a perfect time to propose, but it's important to apply unhurriedly and when you feel calm, composed, and ready. If you have planned the application process in as much detail as possible, then the time has come. Here are a few things to keep in mind:
- Is there an important day for both of you? For example your anniversary or first date, or some other celebration?
- Sometimes time alone chooses the right time due to time constraints, especially if the two of you live in different cities and meet on a special holiday and this is your only chance to propose.
- Consider the time he wants to get married. It can be helpful to ask her directly or through friends or family if there's a specific season, month, or timeframe she wants to get engaged and prepare for the wedding without feeling rushed. If he mentions that he wants a fall wedding, try proposing in the fall of the previous year – if you proposed a few months before the fall and he wants a big fall wedding, he may not like waiting more than a year to get married.
- Applying for holidays or special birthdays can be both profitable and detrimental. On the one hand, this holiday will make the event more meaningful, especially if the family is together or it's time for fun. On the other hand, your proposed date will be the same as your vacation date; if you want to celebrate your engagement date, this will make it feel less personal to some, though for others, it's a great way to remember it!
- Whenever you propose, make sure you have some alone time together after the proposal. If you're planning to propose to her on Thanksgiving with your family around, for example, make sure you take her out for a walk or somewhere quiet while doing so, before you get lost in the family conversation and don't have time to understand what just happened.
Step 5. Decide where to apply
The place and situation of the proposal will be remembered forever and the most important thing to remember is that you are the creator of the situation! Normally, you can propose anywhere, but it helps to choose a place that is meaningful to both of you and one that is comfortable, quiet, and natural.
- Where is his favorite place? Does he like beaches, sunsets, tall buildings, bridges, city buildings, nature, and so on? Or maybe he prefers watching movies at the local theater?
- What is practical? The more you try to make a special event, the more things will probably go wrong. Sometimes, it's easier to focus on what you believe will work and both of you appreciate.
- Consider romantic places like the beach, botanical gardens, famous restaurants with beautiful views, covered bridges, picnics, and more.
- Consider the things you both like. Maybe this will be a source of inspiration, for example applying while camping, fishing, sailing, climbing, cycling, watching a sports game, traveling somewhere, and more. The advantage of proposing while doing the things you love is that he won't think you're going to propose because this is your routine.
- Reserve a place if needed. If you're applying for a place like a restaurant where you have to use the best tables, etc., make sure you book in advance.
Step 6. Decide how you apply
Once you've determined the time and place to apply, it's time to think about the details. Usually, there will be a ring. But what other things should be added to make this event memorable and romantic for him? Remember that how you propose will be told over and over again, so make sure you impress! There are many possibilities that can be done and it's all up to you. But, for inspiration, here are some suggestions:
- Try the traditional style. Get down on one knee, take his hand and ask him to marry you. This move is beautiful because it is recognized worldwide thanks to movies, and it can be done anywhere. It's just that if there are other people around, they'll be eavesdropping (friendly!), so use their interest and support.
- Find out if he wants something public or a bit private. Although most women in films are proposed in public places, in real life, most engagements are done in private. You might think that it's a good idea to propose mid-game or a closed party with a few friends, but she may be embarrassed by the amount of attention that's been given to her. Plus, if this proposal doesn't go well, you'll feel really embarrassed in front of so many people.
- Think about things that might accompany the event, such as a musical quartet or serenade or small fireworks display, and so on. Extras like these are unnecessary and will cost you unless your friends are willing to help, but if this is your forte, these things can be done.
- Hide ring. This is another way of proposing that requires him to find his ring, then you propose to him. Places to hide rings include flowers, chocolates, or special gifts. Make sure to ask him to open the gifts right away or you might end up waiting a very long time! And be careful not to put them where they might accidentally eat them; this will destroy the event.
- Be creative. If you're not too old-fashioned or don't want to say the word proposal, there are ways to propose that involve a lot more planning, but can be a lot of fun and at the same time convince her that you're the right weirdo for her to spend the rest of her life with. You can give him a puzzle or crossword puzzle whose final answer is Will you marry me?.
- You can do something small and sweet, involving the kids in your family, or even your pets.
- If you can do it and think he'll like it, you can make an airplane write a proposal question in the sky while the two of you are out for a walk together.
- Proposing while on vacation is another popular way. If you do this, make sure he will say yes! Nothing can make your vacation worse than being rejected on the first night.
- Maybe you can use publicity, such as placing an ad in the newspaper he's about to read, announcing his proposal through his favorite radio DJ, or placing a large banner with questions on the bridge he crosses every day.
Step 7. Find a ring
If you know what kind of ring your boyfriend wants, then that's a good thing. But if you don't know or don't want to ask, look for a temporary ring, and buy another one after you propose; most women prefer to choose their own ring. But if you know exactly which ring he wants, then you have to steal the ring he used to measure it and know his ring size. He'll be touched if you remember what he wants – and the ring size is just right! However, if you don't know the ring he wants, casually asking him will let him know what's on your mind.
- You don't have to spend your money on an engagement ring, especially if you can't afford it. Better to buy something small and classic, and save for your future than spend all your savings on a piece of jewelry.
- Read How to choose a wedding ring for more information.
Step 8. Dress the best, according to the event and choice of venue
Dress well until you are sure that you are already very handsome and attractive. This is a very special occasion and you deserve to "look perfect". He will really appreciate the effort you have put in. Usually, this only applies if you plan to propose in an elegant place and you have time to change clothes beforehand. If you're applying at the beach, while climbing, skiing, or diving, wear appropriate clothing!
Step 9. Practice
If you're going to propose, you have to practice. Practice asking questions and practicing explaining why you love him so much that you want to spend the rest of your life with him. Practice will help you prevent your tongue from sticking out during this crucial moment. This doesn't mean you have to put pressure on yourself. While this makes your boyfriend feel very special, in the end, he may just remember the words, "Will you marry me?"
Keep your application simple, direct, and from the heart. For example: "Mel, I love you more than words can describe. You are the wisest, generous, kind and beautiful woman I have ever known and I would feel very honored if given the opportunity to spend my life with you. Would you marry me?" ?"
Step 10. Apply
There is no better time than now to put your plans into action. Take him to his "place" and start working on your plan. Make sure you don't make mistakes like holding the ring in your pocket all the time or saying crazy things. If you take her somewhere she's never been before or a very romantic place, and you feel like if you stay there longer than 30 seconds, she'll know what's on your mind, then try to propose as soon as possible so she'll be surprised.
- There may be crying, screaming, or shock. Don't be bothered; this is a normal reaction, even if he already knows what you're going to do. This all didn't feel real to him until it was over!
- If he says yes, end your proposal with a kiss or hug. And don't forget to put a ring on her finger!
- If he says no, understand him and don't get angry. He may need some time to think and your sour face and angry attitude will leave a bad impression on him. Be a real man and don't be disappointed – you did your best.
Tips
- The afternoon is a very romantic time to propose, but it doesn't really matter. And for most people, a daytime proposal in a beautiful setting is just as romantic.
- "Kneeling" originally started as a "gentleman" style to show his respect for his bride-to-be, what a sweet gesture!
- Talk to him about this. If you think you can be together for the next 50 years, you can talk about things like marriage. Make sure he wants to marry you.
- Originality is stunning, but don't overdo it.
- Don't worry that he will say "No" or "I have to think about it" – this is a big step.
- When applying, don't be nervous and say the wrong thing (although this is normal). Record the words you are about to say and sleep somewhere only you can hear the tape. Then play the tape and practice so you don't make a mistake.
- If possible, attach a video camera or ask someone to take photos. This would be great if shown to a family member or friend.
- Ask the restaurant if they can arrange a champagne "toast" after you propose.
- If you really don't know, ask friends or family.
- Consider hiring a professional. Some businesses specialize in creative will-you-marry events and offer services to relieve tension when you ask them.
- Have her choose 3-5 rings she wants as engagement rings. Every jeweler says this is a great idea because even if she loves every part of her ring, she probably doesn't care.
Warning
- Try to avoid things that are too clichéd like: at dinner; through a large television set at the match; or hiding rings in food. Do it where he likes.
- Avoid distracting him by talking about the type of person who doesn't want to get married or run away from commitments. This is mean and unimportant, and can put you in a critical situation when he gets frustrated and annoyed by non-committal comments or busy people. Anything that messed up that afternoon, would be very hard to get rid of. And even if he guesses what you're going to do, this delay will frustrate him and won't feel real until you actually propose. Think "fairy tale"!
- Avoid saying clichés or yielding comments like "I knew this was what you wanted all along, so now you're going to get me."
- Be normal when you propose to her. When you buy a ring or arrange a place to propose to her, tell her that you are busy at work or with your friends rather than giving elaborate excuses.
- If you're nervous, hire an application planner to coordinate and work out the details on the day of the application, so you don't have to worry and panic. This is the beginning of most arguments on proposal day.
- Calm yourself; It's very unromantic if you accidentally spout or vomit out of fear.
