Winston Churchill once said that "A fanatic is one who cannot change his mind and will not change the subject." If you don't like the topic being discussed or you think the other person is uncomfortable with the topic, there are several ways you can steer the conversation to a new topic.
Step
Method 1 of 3: Finding Opportunities to Change the Topic
Step 1. Get ready
If you're going to be talking to a lot of people you don't know, look for two to three topics with which to make small talk.
Choose a topic of conversation that many people like, such as hobbies, sports, and electronic devices
Step 2. Find a topic of conversation that relates to the other person
Many people like to talk about themselves. Therefore, you should focus the conversation on topics related to the other person. This will help you change the subject.
Choose a topic that is considered important to the other person, such as a hobby, an event he is looking forward to, or a side job he is currently working on
Step 3. Give compliments sincerely
This is done to make it easier to change the subject when you are talking to anyone. Find things that stand out in the appearance of the other person, such as jewelry, shoes, and clothes. After that, compliment her appearance.
You can also broaden the topic of this conversation by asking questions about things related to his appearance. For example: "Your clothes are beautiful. Where did you buy them?"
Step 4. Try changing the subject suddenly
If there is a pause that makes the conversation awkward, change the subject immediately rather than continuing the previous conversation. In addition, you can also try to gradually move the conversation to another topic.
Start the conversation by asking a simple question that catches the attention of the other person, such as "Which musician do you idolize?" or "What's the weirdest job you've ever done?" Questions asked to start a conversation are also known as conversation starters
Step 5. Consider your relationship with the other person
When looking for a topic to talk about, consider your relationship with the other person. Are you trying to change the subject when you're talking to a coworker, someone you just met, or your in-laws? The closer you are to the person you are talking to, the more topics you can talk about.
- If you're talking to someone you don't know, keep it simple and light. If you don't know the person you're talking to, you don't know what topics of conversation might offend him. Weather conditions are a safe topic to discuss with strangers.
- If you are trying to get to know the other person better, try exchanging information. For example, if you meet the other person at a seminar, ask him or her what attracted him or her to this seminar.
- If you talk to a coworker, you can exchange opinions with him or her. To change the subject, give your opinion on the topic being discussed. For example, your friend complains about the food served at the restaurant you chose. You can change the subject by asking questions like, "Have you heard this song? I think I've heard it."
- When talking to close friends or family, you can talk about things that relate to how you and the other person are feeling. This topic of conversation is the most intimate and you can use it to change the subject when talking to your partner or family member. Ask what the other person thinks or feels about the previous topic of conversation.
Method 2 of 3: Talking About Your Surroundings
Step 1. Focus the conversation on the things around you
Talk about things around you, such as the paintings hanging on the walls, the food served, the events you're following, and so on.
- Make the other person think. Ask questions like, "How many people do you think are in this place?"
- Point out the strange things around you. For example, ask questions like, “Do you see that big dog over there?”
Step 2. Invite others to join in the conversation
Another way to change the subject is to invite other people into the conversation. You can introduce the other person to someone you know or ask the other person to help introduce yourself to other people.
If you and the other person do not know the people present, invite him to meet the people who are gathering and introduce yourself to them together
Step 3. Stop the conversation and go away for a while
When asking permission to leave for a while, you can let the other person know that you will be right back if you plan to continue the conversation with him. Taking a few minutes' break gives you the opportunity to change the subject.
Use excuses that people usually use. Tell the other person you want to go to the restroom, grab some food, or get some fresh air for a few minutes
Step 4. Pretend to receive a phone call
You can ask friends for help to contact you at certain times. Apart from that, there are cell phone apps that give out phone calls automatically.
- This method is especially useful if you are dating someone for the first time.
- You can continue the conversation with the other person. However, interruptions from phone calls can give you the opportunity to change the subject.
Method 3 of 3: Softly Steer the Conversation Topic
Step 1. Change the subject slowly
You can move the conversation to another topic slowly instead of changing it suddenly. To do this, you can outline the topic at hand and slowly link the topic being discussed to other topics.
Use word associations to change the topic of conversation. Word association is a technique used to associate the word or topic being discussed with other topics that are still related to it. For example, if you feel that the conversation about a concert being held in Jakarta has been going on for too long, give your opinion about the musicians who performed at the concert. After that, you can slowly change the topic of conversation with things related to Indonesian musicians
Step 2. Use the "yes, but" method of speaking
You can change the subject by agreeing to what the other person is saying and then using the word "but" to change the topic.
- For example, if you don't want to talk about television shows anymore, you could say, "I also like watching television, but I actually prefer watching theater."
- Transitional words and phrases that can be used include: "By the way…" and "Actually…"
Step 3. Ask questions
Let the other person help you change the subject. Listen carefully to what he is saying and ask questions that lead the conversation to another topic.
Have open-ended questions. This question cannot be answered by simply saying "yes" or "no". Ask questions that begin with "who," "what," "where," "when," "why," or "how" for more detailed answers
Step 4. Revisit the previous topic of conversation
When you are talking to the other person, you may find the conversation boring. You can rekindle the conversation by revisiting the previous topic by saying something like, "I'm very interested in what we talked about earlier. Can you tell us more about the topic?"
Warning
- Avoid talking about things that relate to you.
- You should not give advice during a conversation, unless the other person asks for it.
