Too long a marriage bond will sometimes turn off the nerves of love and passion in you and your wife. Without realizing it, your intimacy with your wife slowly diminishes; no more affectionate phrases, no more flowers, no more romantic dinners--even though you were diligent about it when you were still dating. Don't worry, you're not the only one in this situation. After marriage, there is a tendency to change focus, both in you and in your wife. If previously you only focused on your wife, now you are required to focus more on work, household affairs, and your children. There are many ways to show your love back to your beloved wife. Find the way your wife likes the most, and make her fall in love again every day!
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Method 1 of 3: Rekindling the Fire of Love that Starts to Extinguish
Step 1. Compliment your wife
Make your wife happy by complimenting her regularly. Think back to those first dates when you couldn't stop praising him; give similar compliments and convey that your love continues to grow every day.
- Start the day by praising your wife. Let her go through the rest of the day with a smile on her face after hearing you say 'You look even more beautiful' or 'I'm lucky to have you'.
- Be 'stubborn'. If he rejects or ignores your compliment because he feels you didn't mean it when he said it, be stubborn. Don't listen to his doubts; look your wife straight in the eye, then hug her and repeat the same compliment to show that you're not kidding.
- Embarrassed to say it in person? Don't worry, you can compliment him implicitly, one of which is to stop flirting with other women. Just a glance of course is not a problem. But if you're constantly staring at other women or making unnecessary comments, you're actually hurting your wife's feelings. Focus on your wife if you want to be appreciated in the same way.
- Show off your wife to others. If your wife hears it herself or has been told by someone else, she will be delighted.
Step 2. Pamper your wife
Pampering your wife doesn't mean you have to buy her expensive jewelry, clothes, or bags. Do something sweet and simple like preparing a warm bath for her, massaging her back, or sending a bouquet of roses to her office.
- Buy a thick bathrobe that your wife can wear after bathing.
- Give your wife time to relax and do whatever she likes.
- Make your wife's favorite dinner. Tell him that he just needs to sit at the table; the rest is your responsibility.
- Buy your wife a pair of sandals made from soft and comfortable to wear at home.
- Plan a picnic with the wife and choose a beautiful picnic location.
- Fragrant toiletries always manage to bring a woman's mood back. Buy aromatic toiletries, then fill the tub with warm water sprinkled with rose petals. Prepare a thick bathrobe and soft slippers for her to wear after bathing.
- As usual, chocolate always manages to lift a woman's mood.
Step 3. Write a love letter to your wife
Most women love to receive love letters from those they care about; considering that in today's era, almost no one speaks by letter anymore. It's okay to send your wife a nice message, tweet, or email. But there's nothing wrong with doing something 'different', like writing a letter in an envelope with his name on it. Believe me, your efforts are worth the happiness that radiates from your wife's face afterward.
- Write down your most romantic thoughts on a piece of paper, then spray the stationery with your wife's favorite fragrance. Give one letter every weekend for a year; Be romantic for the woman you love the most.
- Don't copy words you find on the internet. Make sure your letter and everything written in it is original and is the product of your own thoughts; that's what makes your letter special.
- Try writing poetry. Even if you never do, your efforts to provide something 'challenging' will be greatly appreciated by your wife.
Step 4. Plan a romantic date
Don't stick to clichéd ideas, like watching a movie followed by a romantic dinner. Try to think of a unique and inspiring date idea that will last a lifetime.
- Do something bold and spontaneous, like traveling out of town without a specific destination or booking a plane ticket to an area you've never been to.
- Do something inspiring, like trying a new activity together. You can take your wife ice skating, join a pottery class, or take a mask painting class.
- Do something new, like hot air balloon ride, horse riding, or rock climbing.
Step 5. Plan a memorable trip
Creating lots of good memories with your wife is one of the benefits of being married for a long time. Relive those memories, don't let them just be printed in a photo album. Treat your wife as if you were not married.
- Take a trip to your first meeting place. Kiss your wife and offer compliments like when you were still with her. Visit the restaurant or movie theater where you dated for the first time.
- Watch your wedding video again. Tell her how beautiful she was that day and how that beauty still shines through today.
Step 6. Focus on the quality of sex
Sometimes, people are too focused on quantity or too busy with the daily grind that sex is no longer an intimate activity. Take one day a week to do more intimate and quality activities with your wife. Show that you still attach importance to quality sex with him.
- There is no exact frequency of having sex. Instead of focusing on quantity, try to focus on quality. Perform special actions that show that you are indeed 'making love', not just 'having sex' with your wife.
- The quality of sex does not depend on the romantic nuances that frame it. Although lighting candles or playing romantic music in the room is also okay, make sure you stay focused on the intimacy and passion between you and your wife; show that your love is still the same as before.
Step 7. Take care of your health and hygiene
Believe me, if you want to dress neatly and smile diligently, your wife is guaranteed to be more comfortable by your side. Maybe he'll even give you a plus if you're willing to keep yourself in shape and shape. Take a bath every day, wear clean and neat clothes, and brush your teeth diligently.
- Also keep your surroundings clean. Put dirty clothes in a separate bag and clean the drains after you shave.
- Watch your attitude and behavior. Living with other people for long periods of time can lead to over-comfort. Keep your manners and manners as your body reacts naturally. For example, say 'Sorry' after you farted or burped.
Method 2 of 3: Help with Housework
Step 1. Offer to help with household chores
If you haven't helped him clean the house or do the laundry, take the time to do it every now and then. While you work, ask your wife to do other things she wants. Trust me, he will be very grateful and appreciate it.
- Taking care of and caring for your children is also a household chore. Activities such as brushing their teeth, accompanying them to the toilet, combing their hair, helping them dress, and feeding them when they eat are quite time-consuming for the wife. It would be nice if you offered to do it for a few days or a few weeks non-stop. Your time and willingness will be very valuable in his eyes.
- If previously taking care of the dog or taking him for an afternoon walk was your wife's job, take the time to do it every now and then. Not only your wife, your pets also need to be happy, right?
- Several times a week, take over the work of washing dishes, sweeping, even washing clothes and ironing them.
Step 2. Appreciate your wife's hard work
Show him that you appreciate his efforts to take care of the household. Nowadays, being a housewife as well as a full-time worker is very common. If you really can't help your wife with it, at least share your admiration for her ability to do it all at once.
- It is important for you to acknowledge your wife's hard work. Remember, everything he does is for the comfort and well-being of the family; and most importantly, he was not paid a dime. You deserve to give him great credit for him.
- Acknowledge your wife's contribution by saying that she is the reason you call this a 'home', not just a 'residential building'. This shows that you appreciate all the effort to make your home comfortable to live in.
Step 3. Watch for minor changes
React when your wife cuts her hair, wears new jewelry, or modifies her daily diet. Your willingness to notice small differences will make him very happy.
- Another simple thing you can do: hold your wife's hand when you are walking together or put your arm around her shoulder while watching television. This simple 'love message' makes him realize that you care about him and feel happy about his existence.
- Don't forget to say 'Thank you!'. Remember, your wife is still a human being who must be humanized. Express your gratitude for all the effort and hard work so far.
Method 3 of 3: Building Happiness Together
Step 1. Listen to your wife's words
Communication is the key to a long and prosperous marital relationship. A willingness to listen is one of the important foundations for understanding a wife's ideas, decisions, and desires. Be an active listener whenever your wife shares her interest; he would really appreciate it if you would do it. He'll also see that you're serious about whatever he says.
- When talking to him, give him your full attention; look him in the eye and react to whatever he says.
- Being willing to listen shows that you are trying to understand them on a deeper level. Remember those first dates when you were interested in whatever he had to say? Bring back those memories and rekindle the same interest. Show your empathy for whatever he says.
- Show that you are really focused on him through body language and verbal speech; lean toward him and look him in the eye when he's talking, nod in an affirmative reaction, hold his hand, say 'Yes' or 'I agree', and ask questions when he stops talking.
Step 2. Show your loyalty
Loyalty is like trust; they are the foundation of a lasting and happy marriage relationship. Don't try to betray one or both; You will know how difficult it is to restore lost trust and loyalty. Be faithful to your wife, both emotionally and physically; he needs both.
- When you decide to be faithful, you have to prove that whenever your wife needs you (emotionally or physically), you will be there for her. In the event of a crisis, he knows that you will be there to support and help him.
- Loyalty means keeping a promise that has been made. Don't do anything that has the potential to break a promise or disappoint your wife.
- Appreciate and compromise with your wife's weaknesses, just as she would with you. There's no need to get angry or use it to embarrass your wife.
- Share positive things about your wife with others. It's normal to complain to friends or relatives, but make sure you don't end up embarrassing your wife. A loyal and responsible person will not scorn his wife behind her back.
Step 3. Set a common goal
Setting long-term goals is an important part of a long-term relationship. As long as you and your wife are able and willing to commit to making it happen, chances are your relationship will last for a long time. Do you want to build a house or renovate an existing house? Or do you want to take a vacation together to a place you've never been? Sometimes busyness makes you forget those dreams. Therefore, take the time to sit down with your wife and discuss the short-term and long-term goals that you want to achieve together.
- Think about and write down the goals of each separately. When you're done, combine your goals and your wife's. Are there similar or even the same goals? Make it your 'common goal'.
- Discussing the purpose of living with your wife at the same time will direct the flow of your life for the next few years. He'll see that you really want to spend the rest of your life with him and care about your marriage.
- Without realizing it, discussing long-term goals will foster a sense of security in the wife. He will also see you as mature and responsible: something that will make him unable to stop loving you.
- If there are goals that have been achieved, make small celebrations with your wife. This is something that you both managed to achieve together that deserves to be rewarded with gifts and celebrations.
Step 4. Give your wife a sense of security, both physically, emotionally, and financially
This doesn't mean you have to practice karate or build muscle at the gym. You can provide security in a very cheap and simple way: show your support to your wife and be by her side whenever needed.
- Invest time and money for your family. This will foster a sense of security in your wife, and strengthen your relationship with your family.
- Be firm so that your wife feels safe by your side. Communicate everything in a firm and open manner (including when asking your wife for her opinion and conveying your needs to her); this will make your relationship with your wife more 'fulfilled' because everything is conveyed honestly and openly.
Step 5. Be morally strong
Show your wife that you will always be by her side in any situation. Being able and willing to be a pillar of strength is one of the main foundations in your relationship with your wife. Protect your wife, make her feel safe by your side, and don't let anyone hurt her feelings.
- Show your understanding when you see your wife having a tough day at work or at home. Pay attention to simple things like hugging him, conveying your love for him, and making sure everything will be okay. Take the time to do this, and he'll fall in love with you again in no time.
- Be nice to others. In the eyes of women, a man who is kind, patient, and understanding is the ideal figure. Be that way not only to him, but also to others around you.
Step 6. Make room for your wife
Everyone needs space and time for themselves, and so does your wife. In her life, she may have to play double roles as wife and office worker. Trust me, it's tiring. Take over her job as a housewife for a while; take your kids on a trip, and let your wife do whatever she wants (even if she just wants to chill in front of the television all day).
- Encourage your wife to have a fun night out with her girlfriends; allow him to relax without having to worry about household matters.
- Encourage your wife to do her hobbies, let her devote her attention to other things outside the family.
Step 7. Find love and happiness through therapy
You have serious marriage problems? Or just need a third party opinion about your marriage relationship? Try seeing a marriage counselor or going to couples therapy; this is a good step to dive into the marital relationship while analyzing the problems involved. By going to therapy, your wife will see that you are serious about any problems in your relationship, no matter how small.
- Counseling is a proactive step towards strengthening your relationship with your wife, and understanding your wife better all the time (not just when you're having problems).
- Therapy can help hone the skills you need to sustain a marriage relationship, such as the ability to communicate openly, solve problems, and discuss differences of opinion.
- Attending a counseling session can help you analyze your relationship with your wife and find the source of the conflict.
