You can't change yourself just by taking small steps that will make you a slightly different person – changing yourself means living your life as a new and better version of yourself. You have to work hard to truly change yourself, maybe you want to change your career, your plans, or the way you view your relationships, but you will receive tenfold results. If you want to change yourself, you have to plan your work, work on your flaws, and never stop learning.
Step
Method 1 of 4: Visualize Your Future
Step 1. Imagine the changes you want to make
Before you begin this process, you should calm down, reflect, and take time to jot down your thoughts. Ask yourself why you want to change yourself and what kind of future you want it to be. Make a list of the things you want to change, and all the ways you can get started.
- Write down any major changes you would like to make. Maybe you want to lose weight to reach your ideal weight; maybe you want to learn to be generous; or you want to quit your job on Wall Street to become a diving instructor. Whatever major changes you want to make, write them down, and make a list of how you will work to make each of your plans come true.
- Also write down any small changes you want. The process of changing yourself will require big steps, the city of Rome was not built in a day, neither is the creation of a new you. Make a list of small things that can slowly help you rebuild your new life. You can meditate in the morning, volunteer in your community even one day a week, or eat more fruits and vegetables each day.
Step 2. Develop a work plan to make these changes
After you've written down the changes that will give you a new future, also write down a reasonable time target where you can say, "Well, I've made it." This target time could be several months, it could be a year or even more. If you have set the date, you will be closer to your goal. You can set a date as a target for getting things done; for example, you could say, "I'm going to finish reading these new books by the end of this month." Planning is part of the commitment.
Record the dates you have set on your calendar, as well as your other commitments
Step 3. Stay motivated
If you want to change yourself more quickly, try to stay positive and keep yourself motivated throughout this process, even if you're not energized or lackluster on certain days. Maintaining mental strength means that you have already won half the battle to become a better person. Here are ways to motivate yourself:
- Post pictures around you that can remind you of your vision of the future. If you plan to devote yourself to a full-time gardening endeavor and expand your property, post pictures of beautiful gardens according to your plans and wishes.
- Write down your plans in a diary. Take at least 10 minutes a day to make notes of what you have accomplished to achieve your goals, and record sequentially the steps of the process that led you to major change. You will be more confident in your goals after reflecting.
- Write at least three reasons on the index card why you want to change yourself. Always carry this card with you so you can see it and strengthen you when you are weak.
Step 4. Tell others about your desire to change yourself
This process will be easier if your loved ones, coworkers, or other people in your life understand your decision. Hold meetings with the people who are important to you and explain the changes you want to make, and ask them to be willing to provide support during this adjustment period. They will understand that you really want to change and they will support you by motivating and encouraging you throughout this process.
- If you are active on social media, also share this plan with your community. The more people who know about your plans, the more you will feel free to make this important commitment.
- Convince yourself that your loved ones take your plans seriously. They shouldn't be pulling you back into the "old you" you wanted to leave.
Method 2 of 4: Overcome Your Weaknesses
Step 1. Improve your way of thinking
The process of re-creation begins with the mind. You can't change yourself if you're still stuck in the same old mindset. Once you have a lot of new mindsets right, you can improve aspects of your thinking so that you can move forward on this journey. You can start by doing the following ways:
- Think more positively. If you notice that you often think about the worst-case scenario of something that could happen, imagine that everyone is angry with you because you made a mistake, or they have become convinced that there is nothing you can do to improve your life, so it's time for you. do our best to be a more positive minded person all the time. Start by curbing your negative thoughts and practice responding positively to make sure you're on the right track.
- Improve your thinking about the future. Many people are full of anxiety and fear when they think about the future–but you are not them! Or at least you are no longer like them. Make sure that whatever you think about the future, even if it's uncertain, can make you feel good and happy.
- Improve the way you see yourself. You have to have confidence and learn to love yourself, the way you look, and the things you do. Without self-confidence, you will not have the ability to change.
- Improve the way you view the situations you face in your life. Learn to be more grateful for the things you do instead of just focusing on the things you want.
Step 2. Improve the way you interact with other people
Even though you may feel that you are already a role model mother, a significant person or friend, there is always room for improvement. If you want to change yourself, it's time to change the way you interact with other people – it could be with a postman or with your husband of thirty years. Here are the ways you can do it:
- Be a better friend. Take time to listen to your friends more, help them with a problem, or give a small favor that will make your friend feel good. Try to care less about yourself and pay more attention to your friends.
- Be a more meaningful person to others. Take the time to be more romantic and more adventurous, and tell your loved ones how you really feel all the time.
- Be a better employee. Whether you are a boss, or a ground floor worker, take the time to get to know your co-workers, always friendly and ready to help.
- Be a better citizen. Take time to do good and volunteer in your community, maybe you can teach the kids to read books in the library, or clean the public park every Saturday.
Step 3. Improve your health condition
Unless you are a health guru, you may need to do some things to improve your overall health. A better body condition will bring about major changes that can improve your mindset, so that you will be better equipped to deal with your everyday problems, leaving you feeling more positive and energized at all times. Do these ways to improve your health:
- Do new exercises regularly. Practice yoga, dance salsa, or take a karate class, and love this new activity as much as you love its health benefits.
- Make time to walk for 20 minutes several times a week. Walking will not only improve your health, but will also give you the opportunity to envision a new vision for your future.
- Apply a healthy diet. Get into the habit of eating a balanced diet three times a day, low in carbohydrates, lean protein, consuming lots of fruits and vegetables.
- Do whatever you can to reduce stress in your life – it will have enormous health benefits. Take time to relax for half an hour before you go to bed, cut back if you make too many commitments, cut down on caffeine consumption, and do your best to eliminate as many stressors as possible in your life.
Method 3 of 4: Never Stop Learning
Step 1. Reach a higher level of education
If you really want to change yourself, you must understand that changing yourself is a never-ending process. While you can achieve anything you set your mind to, if you still want to become a better and more educated person, you have to admit that there is always something to learn. Thus you will not become complacent and you will always be moved to fulfill your need to increase knowledge. You can attend education in traditional or non-traditional ways:
- If over the last few years you've been thinking about returning to study, it's time to apply, no matter how old you are or whether you're feeling unsure. You should apply to study at a campus or university in your community to improve, especially if you need formal education to achieve your desired career path.
- Read the work of experts in the areas you want to master. You can learn a lot about any topic by getting information straight from the source. You can plan to study a complete new course each week.
- Take a trip. Seeing the wonders of the world can change your perspective and help you become an open-minded person, it also makes you understand how everyday life works on the other side of the world.
- Master another language. Take language classes in private, larynx, or through textbooks so you can improve your brain power and train you to think in different patterns from what you're already familiar with.
Step 2. Read more
Reading is the key to extending what you have already learned. If you don't like reading, you can't gain knowledge and become the best you can be. You can read a variety of reading materials, ranging from newspapers, fiction, non-fiction history, biographies, or scientific writings. Whatever you read, as long as the source is reliable, will help you increase your knowledge and make you a highly educated person. Here are some good readings for you:
- Read about philosophy. Philosophy will broaden your view of the world and show that life is more complicated than it seems. Reading about philosophy will also open up your perspective on your everyday life, and help you refine your vision of your future self.
- Read about international fiction. By reading the works of writers from other countries, you will understand how people live in other parts of the world. Reading about other countries is also a good way to travel without having to move from your seat.
- Read the newspaper. Make a plan to read the newspaper even if it's only 10-15 minutes a day, so that you feel more prepared because you're always up to date with new events and have a stronger intuition about the state of the world.
- Read classic books. Treat yourself to a book by Tolstoy, Dickens, or Poe and you'll feel as though you have a better knowledge of literary history. And in the end, literature can teach you how to live life, and many classic books tell about the central character of a person who is trying to change himself.
Step 3. Learn from others
The people around you can be as useful a resource as lessons from college or classic novels. Take the time to talk to those around you so you can receive the valuable knowledge they can share, and receive the skills you need to achieve your plan to change yourself. There are several ways that you can learn from others:
- Ask your close friends to teach you a skill. If you have a friend who cooks like a world-class cook, dances like a professional dancer, or who really likes to paint with watercolors, ask your friend to give you some time during the day to teach you their craft.
- Ask your friends for help related to work. Talk to people at your company who have worked longer than you and ask some questions that could increase your productivity at work or the way you handle your work. If you are looking for a career change, talk to people who are experts in the field you chose as your new career, and see what advice they can give you.
- Talk to older siblings. Take the time to talk to your older sibling, not just for advice on life, but to understand more about the history of your family. Don't let yourself keep a thousand questions about your family's past when it's too late.
Step 4. Practice focusing like a laser beam
Almost everyone has a hard time focusing on one particular thing, and the better your ability to focus, the better equipped you will be to develop your knowledge and work on your plans. Whatever you think, anyone can improve their ability to focus with persistent effort. There are several ways to do this:
- Get used to being more organized. Try to maintain a comfortable workplace, keep files with a good system, and keep your home tidy. You will find it easier to concentrate on your work if you know where the items you need are located.
- Learn how to avoid distractions. Spend less time browsing the Internet, watching non-essential programs, or texting your friends non-stop instead of calling them directly. Avoid all activities that can prevent you from achieving your goals.
- Take time to rest. One way to focus is to take a break after you've worked hard for a few hours. If you don't give your mind regular breaks, it's going to be more difficult for you to achieve what you want, whether it's writing a term paper or changing your overall appearance.
Method 4 of 4: Transforming Yourself Completely
Step 1. Change your appearance
If you want to change yourself, change how you look to make yourself feel like a completely different person. You won't feel completely changed if you still see the same person's look every time you look in the mirror. You can do the following ways to change your appearance:
- Change your hairstyle. If you have long hair, why don't you cut it just above your chin? Tired of the brown hair color since you were born? Try changing to blonde.
- Change your style of dress. Are you used to looking shabby? Try to dress neatly. Do you like luxurious looks? Try a hipster model.
- Improve your body language. Your body language is an important aspect of your appearance, so make it a habit to stand taller, hang your arms at your sides and don't cross them in front of your chest, and make eye contact when you speak.
- Smile more often. Smiling makes you look fresher and makes you appear more positive.
Step 2. Change the way you speak
What you say and how you say it can say a lot about you, so you have to change the way you interact in everyday conversation so that you can be your best self. If you talk in a different way, you may start to feel like a different person. You can change the way you speak in the following ways:
- Adjust your speaking habits. If you are a talkative person, make an effort to listen more and talk less, then you will have the opportunity to learn more. If you are a shy person, try to talk more in everyday conversations, then you will realize that you can contribute more than you think.
- Change the way you talk. If you're used to speaking quickly, try slowing down and saying each word with clear articulation. If you usually speak softly, raise your voice and speak more confidently.
- Change the things you talk about. If you'd rather spend your time grumbling or complaining than talking about things you enjoy, talk about positive things that have happened to you in your life, and things that made you happy.
- Don't gossip. While it's hard not to gossip at all, try not to say bad things about other people behind their backs, ridicule, or simply dislike others. You'll feel much better about yourself if you can say nice things about other people when they're not with you.
Step 3. Change the things you do
If you really want to change yourself, there are many things you do every day that you must change. You can change everything from your job to your eating habits. There are several ways to change what you do so that you can improve yourself:
- Change your career choice. Part of trying to improve yourself may mean changing your career path by choosing a career that is more in line with what you want and makes you happy.
- Take up a new hobby. Find a new activity that is your hobby or that you enjoy, such as bird watching, surfing, writing poetry, or training for a marathon. Do whatever it takes to make you feel like someone new.
- Find other people you can make friends with. Make new friends, introduce new friends to your friends, and meet people you don't even know. By doing these things you will feel more like a new person.
Step 4. Change your environment
Changing the environment makes you feel like a whole new person, you will have a new perspective, and feel closer to the goal of achieving what you want in the future. You can change your environment by doing the following:
- If you really want to change yourself, consider moving to a completely new place where you don't know anyone yet. This may be scary, but it will make it easier for you to break off your attachments to the things that have shaped you over the years.
- Move to a new residence. If you are tired of living in your apartment but you are too lazy to move to a new place, this is the right time. Living in a place that makes you feel more comfortable and different will help you make the transition more smoothly.
- Go on vacation. While a vacation isn't a great solution to a permanent problem, you can take a trip to a new place for a week or two to help you clear your head and make your vision of the future more complete.
- Do renovations for your room. If you can't move and don't have time for a vacation, you can change the color of your wall paint, rearrange the layout of your furniture, and throw away or donate furniture or clothes that you no longer need. You can change your room to make you feel like you are in a new environment.
- Consider working abroad. This is quite a dramatic approach, but in this way you can definitely change yourself more quickly.
Tips
- Be patient. You can't change yourself overnight, no matter how hard you try.
- You will need time to get used to each new thing and you will feel isolated but don't run away from isolation. Learn to accept it.