Manipulating other people is a great way to get what you want – for example when you want to ask your boss for a raise, or when you hope to take your partner on a romantic vacation. Whatever your reasons for manipulating someone, if you want to make the right moves, you'll need to hone your manipulation skills, try different manipulation techniques, and learn how to manipulate people in a variety of situations. Then follow these steps if you want to learn how to manipulate people faster than just pretending to cry.
Step
Method 1 of 3: Hone Your Manipulation Skills
Step 1. Take an acting course
The important thing about manipulation is learning how to control your emotions and get others to believe in your fake feelings. If you want to know how to look sadder than you usually are, or use a variety of emotional techniques to convince people, then the best way to develop your powers of persuasion is to take an acting class.
Don't tell anyone that you took acting classes just to learn how to manipulate other people. Because if you do, they will be more suspicious of your attitude
Step 2. Take a debate or public speaking course
While acting classes help you to master your emotions and convince others that you are in a lot of pain if you don't get what you want, taking a public speaking or debating course will help you learn how to convince others to give you what you want in a calm way. and rational. Not only will this course allow you to learn to organize and convey your thoughts in a more constructive way, but you'll also learn techniques that can make your needs sound very convincing.
Step 3. Act similarly
You can do this with a method called 'pacing', where you imitate language style, intonation patterns, and much more.
A calm and persuasive way is a good way to convince your boss or co-worker to do something. Emotional attitudes are inappropriate for a professional environment
Step 4. Develop self charisma
Charismatic people tend to naturally get what they want. If you want to manipulate others, then you have to develop your charisma. You need to be able to bring the atmosphere, have approachable body language that makes other people want to talk to you, and be able to establish a conversation with anyone, whether it's your nine-year-old cousin to your history teacher. Here are some ways to become a charismatic person:
- Make the other person feel special. Maintain eye contact while you talk to them, and ask about their feelings and interests. Show them that you really want to know about them-even if you feel otherwise.
- Show confidence. Charismatic people love themselves and what they do. And if you have self-confidence, then others will count on you and give in to your needs.
- Tell something either the truth or a lie with confidence. Tell something fluently. Does this help?
Step 5. Learn from the experts
If you have a friend, family member, or even enemy who is a master of manipulation, you should study this person and even take note of the things he always does to get what he wants. This will give you a new perspective on how to manipulate others, even if you end up being manipulated in the process.
If you are determined to learn how to manipulate other people, then you may have the ability to manipulate one of these experts
Step 6. Learn to understand other people
Everyone has different psychological and emotional states and therefore should be manipulated in different ways. Before you plan to manipulate someone, take your time to study the person so you can understand what is moving their heart and see the right approach for that person to accept your request. The following are things you may find when understanding other people:
- There are types of people who are easily carried away by emotional reactions. These people are easily moved, cry easily at the movies, love puppies, and have strong feelings of sympathy and empathy. Therefore, in order for them to want to do what you want, you have to play with their emotions until they feel sorry for you and finally agree to your request.
- There are also types of people who feel guilty very easily. Usually these people grew up in overly disciplined families where punishment was something they would get every time they made a mistake, so as they grew older, they often felt guilty about everything. So this way of manipulating people, the answer is obvious - make them feel guilty for not giving them what you want until they finally give in to their guilt.
- Some people are more approachable with a rational approach. If your friend is a logical person, reads the news a lot, and always needs facts and evidence before making a decision, then using your feelings to manipulate her is not the way to go. Therefore, you should use calm persuasion methods to get what you want.
Method 2 of 3: Use Various Manipulation Techniques
Step 1. Make illogical requests first, then make your more reasonable requests
This tactic has been proven to work to get what you want. Simple. If you want to manipulate someone, it's a good idea to make an illogical request first, wait for the person to refuse, then make your more reasonable request. The second request will feel more acceptable to your target than the first.
For example, if you want your employees to show up early for the next day, just say, “Would you like to lead this new project? You just need to come to the office two hours early for the next few months.” When your employee shakes their head, just say, “Oh, okay. But will you come early tomorrow to help me finish this report?” Then he will prefer your second request over the first
Step 2. Make unusual requests before making your real request
Another way to get the other person to do what you want is to make an unusual request that will catch the person off guard so they can't think of turning you down. However, if you immediately make a real request-whether it's about money, a ride, or help with homework-people are more likely to turn it down because those are usually things they don't like to do.
For example, if you want to ask someone you don't know to sign a letter of application, you can first ask that person to help you tie your shoelaces because you have sprained your waist and prevented you from bending over. So with this you establish a relationship with that person so that later on that person is less likely to refuse when you ask him to sign the application
Step 3. Create anxiety followed by relief
If you want to get what you want, you can make the person feel very anxious first, then give them relief, so that they will be happy enough to grant your wish. This trick is indeed a trick that is a bit cunning but can pay off.
For example, you might say to your friend, “You know, when I was driving your car, I heard a terrible noise and was sure that your car engine was not running. Then I realized it was the sound of the radio - isn't that funny?" Pause for a moment and wait for your friend to recover from the shock and then you say, "I'm thinking - can I borrow your car again this weekend?"
Step 4. Make the person feel guilty
Guilt is a great tactic to get what you want if you manipulate the right people. First, choose someone who is prone to guilt. Then make the person feel that he or she is a bad parent, friend, or lover for not giving you what you want, even if your request is ridiculous.
- If you want your parents to feel guilty, make them feel like they messed up your life or your youth by not letting you have enough life experiences.
- If you want your friend to feel guilty, remind her of the great things you've done for her, or casually mention incidents where she has let you down.
- If you want your boyfriend to feel guilty, just say, "It's okay-I was expecting this," to make him feel like he's let you down.
Step 5. Give a bribe
Another way to get what you want is to bribe. However, you don't really have to bribe someone to achieve this goal of yours. All you need to do is bribe the person with a less valuable bribe, or even do something for him in return. For example, when you want to ask your friend to help you study for a math test, you can offer him a ride to school in return, even if you've given him a ride before and you don't mind.
- Find out what the person is wanting and try to be able to give it. For example, if your friend is in love with a new student at school, tell her that you promise to get the new student's phone number if she does what you want.
- Don't make it obvious that you're bribing. Make it seem like you really want to do something good for him in return.
Step 6. Pretend to be a victim
As long as you don't go too far, pretending to be a victim is a great way to get what you want. This great tactic will always work if done right, but you are advised not to do it too often. To do so, you just have to act like you're awesome, altruistic or unselfish, but somehow you have to endure all the ugliness of the world.
- Act stupid. Say, "I don't even know why I'm always wrong." Make it seem like you're really confused about all the things that never worked out for you.
- Say, "It's okay-I'm used to this." Make the person feel guilty, as if the people around you will never help you.
- Make yourself look pathetic. If your friend doesn't want to give you a ride, say, "It's okay-I'll just walk. Count sports."
Step 7. Use your logic
Logic is the best persuader for rational people. Confront them with at least three well-thought-out reasons why your desire benefits you and even them. Speak calmly and rationally when you make your point and don't lose control. In order to reach a rational person, you must restrain your emotions, otherwise you will not get what you want.
Act the way you want, because that's the sensible thing to do. Make the person feel silly for not seeing how serious you are without you having to say it
Step 8. Don't damage your character
Whatever your method, if the person you're manipulating - whether it's a friend, coworker, or partner - accuses you of using manipulation tactics or is pretending to look sadder than you usually are, then never admit that it's true. Instead, you should look more hurt and say, “I can't believe you could think that,” which will surely make the person feel guilty and sorry for saying that.
Once you admit that you used manipulation tactics on someone, it will be very difficult for you to manipulate that person again
Method 3 of 3: Manipulating the People in Your Life
Step 1. Manipulate your friends
Manipulating your friends can get really tricky if you don't do it right because they know you enough to know your bad side. But don't worry – you can still get your friends to do what you want. First, you have to win your friend's heart. A week before you want to ask for help, be a good person to him, do small favors for him, and try to show that he is a good friend. Do everything that will show you are a good friend, but don't overdo it.
- Show your emotions. A friend cares about you, and they don't want to see you sad. Use the acting skills you've learned to make you look sadder than you usually are.
- Remind your friends that you are indeed a good friend. Describe instances where you have done great things for your friendship.
- Make him feel guilty. You don't have to use the "bad friend" tactic, but you can casually mention times when your friends let you down. Make it sound like you're used to your friend's indifference, but don't look like you're accusing.
Step 2. Manipulate your partner
Manipulating your partner shouldn't be difficult. The surest way to do this is to turn him on, then tell him what you want, and then threaten him that you won't continue the ongoing love game if he doesn't grant your request. However, if you don't want to take this to extremes, there are a number of more subtle ways to manipulate your partner.
Whatever your approach technique, make sure you look sexy when you say what you want. When he realizes how cute or sexy you are, you will be close to success in getting what you want
Step 3. How easily someone is manipulated by you also depends on the impression you have
Be agile and flexible about your image projection (give it a different impression).
- Use your emotions. Does your partner want to see you cry or be sad? Of course not.
- If you really want to get what you want, doing something embarrassing in public can be an option. Just as a parent grants their child a request because their child has a tantrum in public, so your spouse will give in to your request if you cry in public. However, you should not do this technique often.
- Give a small bribe. If you're dying to be taken on a romantic picnic by your boyfriend, offer to go watch a football game with him the next day. This would seem like a simple compromise rather than a manipulation.
Step 4. Manipulate your boss
The best way to manipulate your boss is with a rational and logical approach. If you cry in front of your boss or share your personal problems, you may end up getting fired instead of getting what you're looking for. Therefore, it would be better if you are logical and firm in front of your boss in presenting concrete reasons why you want this.
- Try to be an exemplary employee the week before you make your wish. Work a little longer, always have a smile on your face, and even bring you bagels or cookies in the morning.
- Ask in a non-urgent manner. Make the request as if it's not really important and just casual. That's better than saying, "There's something really important I want to ask you." This will warn him that your request is something big.
- Try to ask him when work hours are over or during breaks. Don't talk to your boss in the morning, it is a time when he is busy with all his work. So it's a good idea to make your request when he's going to lunch or after work-then he'll probably think it's better to just grant your request instead of wasting his time arguing with you.
Step 5. Manipulate your teacher
To manipulate your teacher, you must combine professionalism with a little emotion. On the day you will make your request, try to be an exemplary student. Do good things like come to school early, show that you've learned the subject matter, and be active and involved in class.
- Tell your teacher that he or she is a great teacher without being overbearing. Take it easy when he says how much he inspires you or how much you like the subject.
- Just say that “a lot of things happen at home.” This will make things awkward and your teacher will feel apologetic without wanting to know more.
- As you continue to talk about your personal life, wait until your teacher feels uncomfortable and offers to add a deadline or let you rework your assignment. But if this doesn't happen, continue with your play. Say, “I know you don't usually give extra time…” and you pause as your eyes start to mist and you look out the window dramatically.
- If it still doesn't work, bother his conscience. Start crying as if the “thing that happened at home” really happened and wait for your teacher to become so uncomfortable that he or she has no other choice but to grant your request.
Step 6. Manipulate your parents
As parents, they should love you unconditionally. This state of affairs makes them very easy to manipulate. If you were raised in a loving and supportive environment, then all you need to do is be a good child for a moment before making your request. Don't come home late at night, spend time studying, and help with homework as much as you can. Only then do you act.
- State your request as if it were something completely natural. For example if you want to go to a concert in the evening on a school day, just say it casually rather than arguing about it. Make it seem like you see no reason why your parents would reject him.
- You can also try asking for it while folding clothes or washing dishes. This will remind your parents that you are really a good child.
- Tell all your friends do this, as well as their parents who also think this is not a problem. Don't make this a big problem.
- Make your parents feel guilty. If you're going to a concert, just say, “It's not something that matters. I'll just ask my friend to buy me a t-shirt or something after the show." Make them feel as if they are actually making you skip your social needs or other experiences. So don't say, "You guys ruined my life!" If you play your cards right, then naturally your parents will come to the same thought as you.
Tips
- Another great tip is when you manipulate someone into doing what you want, but it turns out to be a more difficult job for them. And when he complains to you how hard it was, just say "oh, I'm sorry that it got that hard. I don't understand how it happened either." And make it seem like it's not your fault. Therefore, before you start any of this, make sure that your wish is something they can do.
- Some people do this naturally, so don't try too hard and try to keep your manipulation technique less obvious.
- Take acting classes to help you master your emotions.
- Try to show interest in someone and make it look like you need something. They will feel the need to help you.
