You can be a big influence on your younger sibling by being a good older sibling. While parents can be good role models, the relationship between siblings can also be a key aspect of growing up to be responsible and successful people in society. You can be a good big brother by supporting him, being active with him, and being a role model for him.
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Part 1 of 3: Supporting Siblings
Step 1. Be a good listener
Perhaps one of the easiest and most straightforward ways to be a good older sibling is to take time to ask how she's doing each day and listen to her stories. Try to make time each day to have a short chat with him, especially if your sibling is a teenager or is starting to get into his teens. Oftentimes, a younger sibling wants to be recognized and listened to by those he or she respects.
- You should practice active listening when you talk to him, whether it's just asking him how he's doing or having a heart-to-heart talk. To listen actively, you need to enter into the conversation so that both of you understand and respect each other more. Turn conversations into learning opportunities, where you can get to know your sibling better and have meaningful conversations.
- Focus your full attention on your sister and let her talk without being interrupted. Pay close attention to what he is saying and respond wisely without judgment. This will open up a conversation and encourage your sibling to open up more to you.
Step 2. Resolve arguments maturely and sincerely
Although siblings tend to fight a lot, try to avoid big and dramatic fights with your sibling. It means that you have to have a big soul and let it win in small fights. Try a compromise with your sibling, where you can get a little of what you want and he gets a bit of what he wants. This will make him feel supported and appreciated, but it will also remind him that he can't always win on his own.
If you can't resolve an argument with your younger sibling without the help of someone else, ask someone you can trust for help, such as an older friend, an older family member, or a parent. Most of the time, fights between siblings are minor issues that you can sort out on your own. But there's nothing wrong with asking other people for help. In this way, you show your sibling that you are not afraid to ask for help when you need it
Step 3. Comfort your sister when she experiences challenges or fails
Your younger sibling may go through a series of trials and tribulations, and he or she may face a big challenge or fail while doing something big. Instead of shaming your sibling for failing or making her feel bad, comfort and support her.
- You can cheer up your sibling by teaching him to stay confident and proud, even when he can't get what he wants or when he fails. You can also remind him that he's only failed on one of the many occasions and that he could have done better on others.
- Another way to cheer him up so he doesn't dwell on failure is to take him to his favorite restaurant or hangout. Sometimes, distraction can make people more cheerful and not wallow in their failures.
Step 4. Respect your little brother's personal boundaries and freedoms
Teach your sibling about personal boundaries and individual freedom, or how to be yourself, different from others, and show how to respect others and yourself. You should also respect your little brother's physical limits by not tickling him, tugging at him, or touching him without his permission. Respect his personal limits mentally by not forcing his will or ideas on him, and not trying to control his thoughts.
Another way to respect your younger sibling's freedom is not to try to force her to grow up too soon or act like an adult because she's still a child or teenager. Let him experience childhood, even if it means he makes mistakes and gets into trouble. Always be there to support him when he is trying to solve problems. If he wants to do things like an adult with you, like go out to dinner or go to the movies together, just do it. However, don't force him to act like an adult if he's not interested
Step 5. Give advice to your sibling based on your own experience
You can support your sister by giving advice if she asks for it. Avoid giving advice when he doesn't ask for it because it will seem pushy. Give advice only when he asks and give it after hearing everything he has to say. Instead of giving general or floating advice, use your own experience when you have successfully overcome or faced various problems. In this way, you empathize with your sister and help her sincerely.
- For example, when your younger sibling has difficulty balancing academic and extracurricular activities. He may not know how to be successful in school as well as in sports or the arts outside of school. You could say something like, "When I was in high school, I also had a hard time managing time. Finally I made a weekly schedule of sorts so I could determine what activities I would do each day.."
- Your sibling may also ask for advice on love matters. If you have experience with this, encourage your sister to share her feelings and the real situation. Give advice on how to build a healthy and responsible romantic relationship with someone. Also give some insight into relationships, especially if you have had valuable experiences that have taught you about love and romance.
Part 2 of 3: Helping Brother
Step 1. Help them do their homework or other responsibilities
One of the nice things you can do for your sibling is to offer to help with homework or other schoolwork. If he has a presentation the next day, try to be a listener while he rehearses his presentation. If he is having trouble with a math assignment, accompany him and help him do it. Focus on the practicalities of helping your younger sibling by teaching a certain lesson or simply helping to get her homework done on time.
Also offer to help with homework or do half of his homework if he's on a schoolwork deadline
Step 2. Attend your sister's show or race
Maybe your sister is at a sports show or competition. Try to be present and applaud from your seat. As a good older sister support her by attending her events.
Step 3. Defend him in an unpleasant situation
As the older sibling, supervise your younger sibling and defend him if he or she falls into a difficult or unpleasant situation. Examples include confronting a bully at school when he or she starts to bully your sister or mediating an argument between your parents and your sister. Try to stand up for your sibling and support him or her to work things out with other people. By standing up for him you show that you are willing to stay with him and support him.
Step 4. Encourage your sister to pursue her dreams and goals
A good older brother will act as the main support for his sister and encourage them to be the best. Pay attention to what your younger sibling's abilities and talents are, and make a proactive effort to help him develop and improve them.
If your sister shows an interest in painting, for example, encourage her to take a painting class or set up a painting studio at home. If your sister has a particular dream, for example, getting into a top college, work with her to help her achieve that goal. For example, you help him register and study for the entrance exam
Part 3 of 3: Becoming a Role Model for Little Brother
Step 1. Demonstrate success at school and at home
Set a good example by doing well in school and doing responsibilities at home. Your sibling will notice if you are doing well in school while being able to do responsibilities at home, such as being able to practice sports while completing homework. Being able to work hard to complete tasks and personal responsibilities will enable you to become a mentor for your younger sibling, because you can manage your own life to support your younger sibling.
Remember that even if you work hard to do your best, you must also dare to fail in front of your younger sibling. While you may come across as the perfect example, your younger sibling will appreciate it more if you show a human side that can make mistakes. This makes you more accessible and honest, as you can share your problems and failures with your younger sibling, just as he shares with you
Step 2. Maintain a healthy social life
One way to be a role model for your younger sibling is to have an active and healthy social life. By having a group of close friends you can set a good example for your younger sibling on how to socialize with others.
If your sister is having trouble making friends or relating to other people, you can take her out with your friends. In this way, he will feel included and he will have the opportunity to learn to socialize by imitating you
Step 3. Show how to respect your parents and others who are older
Always be respectful when talking to your parents and polite when you are around older people, such as a teacher or a friend's parents. Building good relationships with older people, from parents to teachers and coaches, will help you develop into a role model. In this way you show the importance of respecting your parents in the presence of your younger sibling.
Step 4. Apologize and admit when you did something wrong
A good role model is willing to admit mistakes when they are wrong and dare to apologize for their mistakes. If you make a mistake, you should be ready to apologize and admit the mistake. Do this in front of your sibling to show the value of an apology and the importance of being humble and honest, even when you've done something wrong. This will make your sister understand that it is natural to make mistakes and that it is important to admit them so that we can get through them without regrets.
