You found a perfect girl in your eyes. He really understands you, always makes you laugh, and always makes you wish you were always by his side. Unfortunately there is one problem: he already has a girlfriend. You want him to know that you like him -- and maybe you even want to be with him -- without offending him and causing trouble. If you want to know how you can approach a girl and successfully attract her without coming across as a bad guy, then take a look at the steps below:
Step
Part 1 of 3: Reading the Situation
Step 1. Talk to the girl you like about her boyfriend
If the girl's boyfriend is a close friend of yours, well, you better give up unless you want to destroy your friendship. However, if you don't know who her boyfriend is and want to know how the girl's relationship with her boyfriend is, you can try to get information about how and how serious their relationship is cleverly without digging deeper than you need to. Here are some expressions you can say:
- "What are you going to do this weekend?"
- "How long have you been dating him?"
- "I have a boyfriend, but our relationship ended a few months ago. It was very difficult, but I feel better now."
Step 2. Find out if he is happy with the relationship he has with his girlfriend
Of course you can't directly ask him if he's happy. You can guess it from your conversation. Simply put, if he complains about his girlfriend or something like that, then it's a strong sign that his relationship with his girlfriend isn't very good. Try to get to know her feelings by making casual comments to her and see if she responds well or not. In simple terms, you don't want to try to get a girl who has a good, long-standing relationship, and you also don't want to face emotional problems even if the girl decides to end her relationship.
- Try saying something like, "You'd love to be dating him. Do you?"
- or, "You two have been together for two years? That's a long time…"
Step 3. Find out if he is interested in you
Before you go any further, try to find out if the girl cares about you romantically. Look at the signs. Is he trying to talk to you? Does he get happier when you enter the room. Does he make excuses to always be by your side? Did he seduce you even a little bit? If so, then there's a good chance he's attracted to you. Here are some other ways you can find out how he feels:
- Talk about the other girl in front of him. Without being too direct, see if he's jealous.
- Give him a compliment once or twice. See if he compliments you on another occasion.
Step 4. Don't get stuck in the friend zone
If you want to be with the girl, avoid being her best friend/boy friend she can turn to when she's having problems. While initially talking about his girlfriend as well as about his romantic relationship can be a good way to find out more about the girl's relationship, you don't want to end up being the guy she goes to with her romantic dramas and where she complains about her problems. naturally with the boyfriend. You want him to see you as another guy he could potentially have a romantic relationship with, straightforward and simple, not just as his best friend.
- Even though you do want him to see you as a potential romantic relationship with him, it doesn't mean that you want to be seen as a man who is smarter and more handsome than his girlfriend. He has to see you as someone totally new, refreshing, and fun, not as some other guy he can just take to the movies and hold hands.
- If he starts to complain about a problem he's having with his girlfriend, try saying something like, "You can talk about it with your best friend. I just don't want to get in the way of stuff like that, is that okay?"
Step 5. Know which girls you shouldn't fight for
If you want to approach a girl you like who unfortunately already has a boyfriend in the hopes that she will break up with him and be with you, then you have to make sure that the girl you are dating is worthy. She is a girl who is genuinely attracted to you and doesn't just want to play with you and then get back with her boyfriend. Here are some girls you should avoid:
- The girl who agrees to dinner and goes to the movies with you who then only comes back to her boyfriend. Don't ask her out like a boyfriend unless you're the girl. He might just use you for free food and drink.
- The girl who seduced you for months but you and she didn't move on to a more serious relationship either. Don't fight for the girl who is constantly flirting with you who just wants to get your attention and nothing more.
- The girl who has a crazy boyfriend. You certainly don't want to get involved in something unpleasant.
- A girl who just wants to be friends with a guy. (See the previous step above which suggests avoiding the friend zone at all costs).
- A girl who only uses you to make her boyfriend jealous. Stay away from girls like that.
Part 2 of 3: Trying to Get the Girl You Want
Step 1. Appreciate the girl
If you want the girl to like you, then you have to respect it, especially the fact that she already has a boyfriend. Don't joke about her boyfriend, be aggressive, always try to hug him, or belittle her boyfriend and romantic relationships. If you really want him to like you, of course you have to treat him with respect. You can compliment him but don't let it make you look like a guy who feels there's nothing wrong with seducing a girl who already has a boyfriend. Let the girl see that you have something special.
Even if the girl feels happy to be around you, the quickest reason that can drive her away is to openly try to get her
Step 2. Let the girl take the initiative
Make him really like you and want to spend more time with you. Tell him the movie you want to see and see if he asks you to go out with him. Tell him about the party you're having and see if he wants to come. Let the initiative be in his hands so he can make his own decisions without feeling like you're pushing him too much. Try to be a man who is not easy to get. Give the impression that you're a competent guy and lots of girls are after you so the girl realizes that if she's attracted to you, she has to put in the effort.
Making him realize how amazing you really are is better than humbling yourself by begging him to spend time with you when you find out he already has a girlfriend
Step 3. Find a way to be with him
Make sure you spend time with him whether it's studying together, going to the same party, or just going to a cafe after class. Don't just seduce her via text or Facebook if you really want to go somewhere with her. If you feel that going out alone with him will feel strange, then try to go with him and your other friends. However, in the future try to go out alone with him when you have the opportunity, so he starts thinking about you romantically and realizes that you and him are very compatible.
Step 4. Make him feel special
Let him know that you see something special in him, and that you don't approach him just because you think he's hot. Give him compliments about his hair, his personality, or his hard work at school. You shouldn't openly show your interest in him, touch him, or anything else. You need to let him know that you see something special in him. If he feels you think of him as an amazing girl, he will start to see you as the right guy for him.
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Show the girl that you care about her opinion. Ask him what he thinks about your new shoes, the chemistry teacher in your class, or about a new band you like. Let him know that what he thinks means a lot to you.
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Step 5. Show that you are interested in him
You don't have to say it outright, but you have to make him see that you see him as more than just a friend. You can show it through compliments, giving him helpful advice that shows you really care about him, or by making eye contact and standing close to him while you talk. Here are some expressions you can say:
- "I think your new haircut makes your eyes stand out more. Your previous haircut did look pretty, but now it's prettier."
- "You're the only girl I've ever met who loves sports and is also easy to talk to about anything. I like her."
- "I think I can talk to you about anything."
Step 6. Show him how amazing you are
You don't have to lie to impress him and feel like it's worth it to know you. Be humble but also show that you are competent, smart, cool, talented, attractive, and also someone who is perfect for him. Be the best you can be honestly.
- Be open to him about the things that are important to you. However, you also need to make sure that he is also open.
- After telling him something quite personal, you can say, "I haven't told anyone about this in a long time. For some reason, I can easily tell you."
Step 7. Be someone new to him
Remember what this article said earlier that the last thing a girl wants is another guy who looks exactly like her boyfriend? Yes, this is very true. Be spontaneous and fun. Don't call or text her every five minutes just to find out what she's doing. Invite him to do something unexpected and fun. Give him a sincere compliment or a cute little gift. Invite him to dance in the middle of the road. Do whatever his boring old girlfriend would never do. Make him feel alive whenever he is with you.
Don't be afraid to chat with him about random stuff if it's funny and interesting. You don't need to be fixated on certain things
Step 8. Approach him persistently (without disturbing him)
This is something that needs to be done. You want him to know that you want him without being too pushy or too passionate. Chat with her at parties, walk beside her after class, but don't be a guy she can seduce and be a guy she can have fun with and then come back to her boyfriend. As much as possible you should be around him, let him know that you are interested in him, but you also need to make him see that you are not going to keep waiting for him to make up his mind.
Step 9. Have a romantic relationship with him
If you only approach her for months, she will think that she can have a guy who can flirt with her and also have a boyfriend. Yes, that's really not nice, and the longer you flirt with him, the more he'll see that he can be with you without the need for a more serious relationship. So, it's time for you to make a move, ask him how he feels about your interest in him, or ask him to decide what he's going to do, whether that means being with you or going back to his girlfriend. Ideally, of course, he would break up with his girlfriend and then be in a relationship with you.
Of course, the sooner this happens the better for you. If you just flirt with him for months without moving forward, chances are he'll never break up with his girlfriend
Part 3 of 3: Things To Do After You're With The Girl You Want
Step 1. Don't rush, take the relationship slowly
You did manage to get what you wanted. You managed to snatch the girl and she dumped her old loser boyfriend. But that doesn't mean you have to buy an engagement ring right away or go on a long weekend trip with him. Even if the girl ends a bad relationship, she will need time to get over it and move forward with you, so give her time and opportunity to feel better. If you try to be with him and date him every second and every day, he may feel tired and walk away from you. Instead, give him some time to himself and go on a date once or twice a week, or date whenever he feels ready.
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This is something that few people understand: breaking up in a relationship is always painful, even when you are the one who broke the relationship. You might think that he feels completely liberated and happy after getting rid of the stifling burdens in his life, but he certainly needs to deal with the pain, as well as the sadness that inevitably comes after parting with something, even when something isn't a good thing. You have to understand this.
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Even though he doesn't always have to be the first to call or text, just make sure you give him the opportunity to take the initiative. If you always call him first, he may think that he's not ready to have a new girlfriend or start a serious relationship.
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Step 2. Avoid talking about his ex-girlfriend
Whether she's ending a three-month relationship with a jerk or ending a five-year relationship with a nice but boring guy, you shouldn't bring up the guy, especially when you just want to make fun of the guy, calling him a guy. loser, reminding the girl that he is too good for such a man, etc. While your intentions may be sincere and just want to make the girl feel better after ending something that didn't go well, she may take it as a critique of the relationship she was in, and may feel offended, there's always a chance she still has feelings for her ex-boyfriend..
- Give him time. If the relationship he ended had been in for five years, then yes, he probably wouldn't be ready to talk about it for very long. It may even take him a year to be able to talk about his ex-girlfriend without feeling hurt and sad. Be patient. If you keep asking him questions about his ex-girlfriend, he'll think you're jealous and he'll get annoyed with you too.
- Well, maybe this is a part of his life that you can't get into for a while because it has to do with his ex-girlfriend. No one ever said that getting a girl who already had a boyfriend was easy, or said that it had no consequences at all. But if you patiently go through this painful time, everything will pay off and not be in vain.
Step 3. Don't think anything out of the ordinary
Yes, you did get the girl from her old boyfriend. You may start to think about the possibility of her having an affair (or having an emotional affair) with another man because he is doing the same thing to you and you are afraid that another man will come along in the future, but hopefully he ends his last relationship because he did. relationships are bad and because he sees something special in you, not because he's an unfaithful girl. If he does have a personality like you feared you might be worried, but if he doesn't have that personality then you don't need to worry although unfortunately sometimes the heart does wander to something more deserving.
- The job you have is to focus on your new relationship instead of worrying about the possibility that she might be attracted to another guy. If you're constantly jealous and thinking weird things because of the way you got it with him, then your newfound love won't go well.
- If he's just gotten rid of something serious, the last thing he might want is to feel as restrained as ever and have to keep you up to date with what he's doing.
Step 4. Make a fresh start
You managed to get the girl you wanted and maybe even officially date her. You and he may be together because things don't feel right, but that doesn't mean you have to think about them all the time. Focus on what's in front of you, not dwelling on the past. Try to build a strong foundation for your love, so that it is not based on lies, betrayals, and uncertainty. Even if you and he had a rough start, you guys might be able to build a strong bond, though yes, it wouldn't be as easy if you and he were just two single people meeting at a bar. If you really want your relationship with him to go well, focus on the things you will do together, not on the pain in the past.
- This doesn't mean that you can't talk about the early days of your relationship. This means that you should focus on the fun things in the future, not on the pain you may have felt in the early days of the relationship.
- Look for new things you've never done before that you've always wanted to try, whether it's making your own sushi or going on a hike. Find what you can claim as your own and that you can use to build a solid foundation for the love you build. Then you and he just need to calm down, relax, and enjoy the love!
Tips
- Note: make sure the boyfriend of the girl you like is not around when you approach the girl.
- Don't act weird around the girl, and be a cool, normal guy around her. then everything can run easily.
- Don't tell anyone that you like the girl except to a good friend or someone you can trust.
- Talk to him and find out what things you can talk about together, then you can talk to him about those things, later on he will start thinking, "Wow, he and I are really good together". Later on, he might even be able to meet you to talk about things he can't share with his girlfriend.
- If you get to know his friends well, they may be able to say nice things about you to him and he may start to be attracted to you.
- Don't try to approach the girl if you know her boyfriend because you could end up fighting with the guy.
- Avoid his ex-girlfriend. He might try to start an argument with you and annoy you because he thinks you're the reason the girl broke up with him. Keep your distance as much as possible. If he's heating up, don't try to provoke him back.
Warning
- Something to watch out for: If a girl breaks up with her boyfriend to be with you, what guarantees can keep her from leaving you when a new guy comes along?
- If the girl is with her boyfriend, don't involve yourself. They will not care about your existence. Being around them can make the friendship you build with the girl feel weird.
- If you are an inexperienced person, never let the fact that you like the girl is known to someone who is on good terms with the girl or her boyfriend, that person can tell the fact to the girl or even to her boyfriend. This is certainly not a good thing.
- If the girl only treats you like a brother, then it is a sign that you should end your feelings for her. Girls like that usually just want to be your friend. But don't worry, time can heal all wounds! Nothing is impossible.
- Don't give the girl your AIM or email address if you're not one to hold yourself back, she might be able to annoy you and shake you up, if that happens, you're more likely to tell the girl how you feel, and this can cause problems when it spreads..
