Are you preparing to enjoy Saturday night at home? If so, maybe it's time to try to develop your social life. Of course, living a social life is easier said than done, and you may feel shy or nervous about meeting new friends and finding a new routine. Start small by contacting old friends, neighbors, and acquaintances so you can build a social network. You can also meet new people by joining clubs or volunteering. Once you have a social life, keep it in touch with friends and be a good friend to those around you.
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Method 1 of 3: Building a Social Network
Step 1. Recall old friends
Think about people you've known before, like friends at school or friends from work in a certain place. You may also have childhood friends or friends from clubs or groups you were in. Contact them so you can socialize.
For example, you could text an old friend saying, “I know it's been a long time since we last talked, but I want to meet you again” or “Hello, friends! How are you?"
Step 2. Get to know your neighbors
Bring cookies or tea to your neighbors as a way to introduce yourself. Focus on neighbors you feel comfortable hanging out with, such as neighbors of the same age or interest.
For example, you could knock on his door and say, “Hello! I was making a cake. Do you/you want to try?” or “Hello! I just wanted to introduce myself and say hello.”
Step 3. Show hospitality to people in class or work
Interact with friends in class, especially those sitting next to or near you. You can also be friendly to people at work as a step to develop your social network.
- For example, you could say to your friend, "Are you studying for the exam tomorrow?" or “How was yesterday's exam?” to start a conversation with him.
- You can also say to your co-workers, “How was your weekend?” or "How was the meeting?" to show friendliness and sociability.
Step 4. Meet online friends in the real world
If you're dealing with people on the internet, find out if you can turn those online interactions into real-world interactions. Hold face-to-face meetings with people you chat with on social media or online groups over coffee or other drinks.
For example, you could say to your online friends, “How fun it was to chat with you on the internet. Would you like to meet over coffee?” or “I want to continue this conversation over coffee together.”
Step 5. Join a club at school or work
Meet new people and socialize by joining a school club, such as a debate club, math team, or marching band team. You can also be a member of a group at work, such as a social event club or company softball team.
You can also join groups outside of school or work, such as art classes or recreational sports teams
Step 6. Participate in volunteer activities in local organizations
Choose an organization you trust and want to join. Take your time to meet like-minded people and connect with them while helping others.
For example, you could volunteer at a soup kitchen or homeless shelter. You can also work at music or arts festivals held in your area
Step 7. Participate in community events
Look for local groups in your area that can help you connect with new people based on similar interests. If you enjoy reading, for example, join a book club. If you enjoy exercising, you can join a running group. There is a wide variety of groups for almost any area of interest.
Read flyers in public places like coffee shops or sites like Facebook to find groups or events held in your city
Method 2 of 3: Talking To New People
Step 1. Greet the other person in a friendly manner
When you meet someone new for the first time, start the conversation by recognizing them in a friendly and lighthearted way so they know you want to communicate or interact with them. You can say “Hello!” or “Hi!”, then introduce yourself. Don't forget to ask for his name.
You can use a light, friendly greeting like, “Hey! My name is Mario! What's your name?"
Step 2. Remember the other person's name when you meet them
Try to remember the other person's name so you can use it in a chat. Repeat the name once or twice aloud so you can remember it easily, and make sure you pronounce it correctly.
- You can say, "Ah, Budi Utomo, huh? Nice to meet you, Budi."
- Ask him to repeat his name if you forget, and apologize for forgetting his name.
Step 3. Demonstrate positive body language
Maintain eye contact when meeting someone. Place your arms relaxed at your sides and point your body towards the other person. You can also lean your body towards the other person. Body language like this shows your interest and involvement in the conversation.
- You can also nod and smile to show that you want to socialize and interact with them.
- Relax your posture. Sit or stand with your shoulders straight and don't lower your head to show that you are open, friendly, and confident.
Step 4. Take advantage of small talk to get to know the other person
When small talk, you talk to the other person about his life to learn more about him. You can also share details about your life if he asks. To start small talk, you can ask the other person about their profession or school. You can also ask how he knows the host when you're at a party.
- For example, you might say, "So how do you know the host of the party?" or “What made you want to come here?”
- You can also say, “What is your job?” or “Where did you go to school?”
- You can answer questions the other person asks about your job or school. Your feedback can keep the conversation going.
Step 5. Ask meaningful follow-up questions in the chat
Follow the information he said in the previous conversation. Ask questions about things he has said. This can develop small chats into more meaningful discussions.
For example, you could ask, “What was it like to study in Japan?” or “What is it like to work in that field?”
Step 6. Focus on the things you are both interested in
Find something you both share an interest in. This could be a television show, film, or book. Take advantage of these shared interests to connect or interact with the other person.
For example, you could say, “I watched that show too, you know! What's your favorite episode?" or “I just finished reading that book. What do you think about the ending?”
Step 7. Suggest something fun or interesting to do with the other person
If you feel that you can connect with other people in a friendly or fun way, you can invite them to meet to do things that you both enjoy. You can also take him out with your other friends or spend some time together to try something you plan to do in the future.
For example, you could say, “Actually, I'm planning to go to a writer's meeting at the bookstore next week. Will you come along?" or “I plan to watch the next episode with my friends. Do you want to join?”
Method 3 of 3: Maintaining a Social Life
Step 1. Plan to meet up with friends on a regular basis
Schedule to connect with your friends, even when you feel like you're always busy. Make time for your friends so you can maintain an active social life.
For example, you could schedule a meeting with your friend at the coffee shop once a month on the same day so that you can clear your schedule for the day. You can also host a game night at your house once a week and invite your friends over so everyone can see each other
Step 2. Accept invitations to spend time together or socialize
Don't deprive yourself of the opportunity to spend quality time with friends. Be open to trying new things and socialize with friends on a regular basis. Try to accept invitations to go out with friends, rather than always turning them down.
You should also try to arrive on time and keep your appointments if you agree to meet and spend time with your friends. Don't cancel last-minute appointments, unless you have a very logical or important reason
Step 3. Be a good listener to your friends
Friendship is built on the act of giving and receiving. To be a good friend and maintain existing friendships, you need to listen to your friend when he or she needs someone to listen to. Try listening to her story if she needs someone to talk to. Show your emotional presence when he needs it.
You should not judge your friend as this can cause problems in the friendship. Instead, listen to him and provide support when he needs it
Step 4. Value and value friendships more highly than the number of friends you have
It takes time to build good friendships and maintain a healthy social life. Connecting with many people can be challenging. Instead of focusing on the number or quantity of friends, make it a priority to be friends with one or two people you like and value, or small friendship groups that allow everyone to connect more deeply.
