Of course everyone makes mistakes! But sometimes there are big mistakes that are very annoying. You may feel angry, embarrassed, sad, or even frustrated. Of course, you need to calm down and reorganize your emotions so that the error can be corrected. There are several strategies that can help you.
Step
Part 1 of 3: Pause for a moment
Step 1. Stop for a few hours
After realizing that you have made a big mistake, avoid doing something immediately. Your emotions will run wild. Your mind will roll fast. Your heart will beat fast. Avoid making any decisions or actions that you will later regret.
You may feel the need to immediately correct your error. Take control of this feeling
Step 2. Find a quiet place to be alone
Avoid noise, excitement, and unwanted social interactions. Go to your room, to your private office, or to the basement and close the door. Turn off your cell phone and computer. All of this will reduce your risk of making impulsive and wrong decisions.
Step 3. Focus on your breathing
After making a big mistake, your breath will be short, unconscious, and coming from the chest. Try changing this. Breathe deeply, long and consciously, from your diaphragm and abdomen. This will feel like breathing from the stomach, and not from the esophagus.
- By concentrating on deep breaths, you will reduce stress levels, lower your heart rate, and breathe in more oxygen.
- People have used this type of breathing for thousands of years, through yoga and meditation. This breathing is scientifically proven to reduce stress and anxiety.
Step 4. Be aware of what you are thinking
Don't let your mind go back to the mistakes you made. Stop your mind from imagining the future consequences of mistakes. Focus on the present, your surroundings, and your body. Be aware of the sounds you make, the temperature around you, what you smell and how you feel. This will make it easier for you to relax.
Part 2 of 3: Managing Your Emotions
Step 1. Express your anger calmly
If you throw a tantrum, your anger will only get worse. You need to calm down and get angry in a non-aggressive way.
Write about your anger in a note, or call a friend, explain what happened, and how you feel now
Step 2. Cry if you want to cry
Crying is a natural process that releases stress hormones and toxins from your body. After crying, you will feel better.
Remember that crying is not a sign of weakness, but a psychological and biochemical process common to humans
Step 3. Laugh
Mistakes are often embarrassing, and one way to deal with shyness is to laugh. Think of the funny aspects of what happened, and laugh.
For example, if you fail to do a good presentation, laugh about how funny it is that you can't decide whether to sit or stand
Step 4. List what needs to be fixed, then create a solution
By making a list, it will be easier for you to deal with the anxiety that arises. If you feel uneasy about what happened, write down everything you feel is wrong. This list will help you control how you feel about the error and develop solutions for dealing with it.
For example, if you feel that you will not pass an exam, make a list of questions that you find difficult. This way, you can develop a study strategy for the next exam. You can also identify some things you can do to minimize the effect the test will have on your grades, such as asking the teacher for extra credit
Step 5. Don't be too hard on yourself
Indeed you must realize that you have made a mistake so that you can learn from it. However, don't hate yourself. To regulate your emotions, realize that you are also a human being. No matter how bad the mistakes you make, remember that everyone can make mistakes.
- There are people who repeat certain sentences to get rid of negative self-destructive thoughts.
- For example, repeat the sentence, "I'm only human, I do the best I can, and that's all I can do."
Part 3 of 3: Closing the Problem
Step 1. Look at the problem with the right perspective
Remember, even if you've made a big mistake, it's only temporary. You may feel unhappy right now, but this feeling won't be the same forever. Remind yourself that your current feelings are only temporary. These thoughts will make it easier for you to solve the problem correctly.
Step 2. Call your friends and family for their support
Everyone has made a big mistake. In fact, someone you know may have made a bigger mistake than you. Put your problem in the right perspective. Keep telling them your mistakes even if their experiences are different from yours. In this way, you will lessen the burden on your own heart.
If your friends and family won't listen, or if you're not happy with their answers, talk to a therapist
Step 3. Apologize if necessary
In some situations, the mistakes you make will affect other people. You need to apologize to them, and you should apologize quickly. Think about whether your mistakes hurt other people. If so, be prepared to apologize to that person.
Say, for example: "I'm sorry for my behavior. I realize that what I did can annoy you, and I feel bad for it. Would you forgive me?"
Step 4. Forgive yourself
You'll have a hard time solving this problem if you're still angry with yourself. So, forgive yourself. It may be difficult, but it will get easier with time.
- Write a letter to yourself that conveys a sense of understanding about what happened. Imagine that you are writing to yourself as a friend. Write the letter carefully.
- Repeat "I forgive myself" throughout the day. The more you say, the easier you will believe.
Step 5. Create a new plan
Maybe option X has failed, but there are still other options you can do. Now you can explore these other options. This process will be interesting. List new possibilities and actions. Invite yourself to dream about what good consequences might arise from the things on the list.
