How to Find Your Soulmate (with Pictures)

2024 Author: Jason Gerald | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-16 10:50

There are people who rely on luck to find a life partner. However, finding the right partner will be much easier if you get to know yourself better, love others, start dating, and be in a relationship. Don't just depend on fate to find a soulmate. You can find a lover by improving yourself and understanding the right ways to be in a relationship.

Step

Part 1 of 2: Looking for a Lover

Step 1. Enjoy being single

Even though it may seem contradictory, you need to feel happy and confident while you're single in order to be considered ready to find a life partner. A lasting relationship can only be established between two people who are healthy, stable, and confident. In order to find a life partner and make the person you like also interested in you, start by understanding yourself, determining what you want, and learning to accept yourself. Try doing some of the following activities to enjoy alone time, for example by:

Looking for fun activities according to hobbies
Appreciate your friendship and family
Build a stable and fulfilling career
Become a confident and strong person
Keep a diary so you can stay focused and remember what you've accomplished

Step 2. Develop your own traits

Write down the qualities you like about your partner. Some are attracted to someone who is humorous or smiling. Maybe you like someone who is athletic and loves sports or someone who likes to read novels. Whatever the nature, try to think about how you can have that trait yourself. That way, you can meet someone with similar interests and desires. In addition, your personality and skills will improve, although this will not help you find a lover.

Step 3. Unlock insights

Research shows that people can't always predict which partner trait they are most attracted to. When you write down the qualities you want, you will usually be attracted to people whose traits are very different from yours. It's okay to change your mind when looking for the ideal partner, however, follow your heart instead of relying on a list of pros and cons. You will be surprised to meet someone so amazing.

Avoid making negative assumptions and prejudices against others. Don't judge someone based on skin color, religion, ethnicity, or age. Try to get to know someone well before deciding whether or not to continue the relationship

Step 4. Don't approach people who already have a partner

If the person you like turns out to be no longer alone, don't be in a relationship with them. Relationships that start with betrayal usually don't last. This kind of relationship stems from a sense of deprivation and a desire to get what is not yours, not from true affection. Before you approach, wait until he's alone again to make sure that this relationship isn't just about winning.

Step 5. Start socializing

The chances of meeting new, fun friends are even greater if you have more fun friends. Work on expanding your circle of friends to make it easier for you to meet someone you can relate to. Make friends and try to get to know them better so you can meet up with new friends who you might be able to date. You can meet people who share the same mindset for example with:

Join the matchmaking community
Participate in joint activities according to hobbies
Volunteer because you want to help others
Join an alumni organization
To strengthen friendships, for example by: inviting friends and acquaintances to have dinner together, having a party, or getting together for coffee.

Step 6. Be friendly

New acquaintances will feel more comfortable if you smile and laugh easily. If you expect someone to open up, show that you're open yourself up and want to be friends with them. If you're feeling attracted to someone, try flirting a little to see if they're interested in you too.

Step 7. Try going on a blind date

Friends usually know who and what you want. Let them help out if there is someone they think could be a great match for you. There are blind dates that fail, but there are also successful ones. Don't be deprived of the opportunity to meet new, fun people.

Step 8. Try to learn how to seduce

There are several ways to seduce someone. But in general, a seducer can only be said to be successful if he is able to respect others, likes to praise, expressive, and fun. People who are introverted, flirty, or flirty while putting themselves down are usually doomed to failure. Pay attention to the following attitudes if you want to seduce or identify the characteristics of someone who is flirting:

Smile and laugh
Give a sign of agreement with a nod or speech
Want to have a long chat
Shows openness through body language (not crossing arms, legs, and letting palms relax)
Telling personal things in detail
Make eye contact
Ask a lot

Step 9. Create an online profile that is honest, yet mysterious

Although it may be a bit difficult, many people find a date on the internet. They succeed because they put up an honest short profile. When compiling a profile, leave things that are still mysterious to the reader, don't reveal everything. Try to get to know each other over time so that your success in finding a date isn't just based on profiles.

Step 10. Gather in a certain place to experience the same feeling

People are usually more attracted to each other when they feel the same way. People are more likely to be sexually attracted to and like other people when they have a faster heart rate, sweat and experience extreme situations. People are usually more attracted to each other when they are in a certain place/in a certain setting, for example:

fitness center
Professional/high standing community
Watching horror movies together

Step 11. Tell yourself that there isn't just one person waiting for you out there

If there is only one person who will fall in love with a certain person, only 1 in 10,000 people will experience true love in their lifetime. As we know, this view is not true at all. People fall in love with each other and live happily. Don't be obsessed by the desire to look for the best, but strive for close, lasting, fun, loving relationships. Try to find someone who wants to grow with you, instead of waiting for the perfect partner to come along. Many people only feel happiness after a long journey in a romantic relationship. This shows that there are life partners who can only become soulmates after trying to know each other for years.

Part 2 of 2: Making Lover as Life Partner

Step 1. Don't just believe in the term “soul mate”

Soulmates are often defined as two people created to complement each other and lead a very harmonious life. However, in a strong, close, and lasting relationship, there are always conflicts and disagreements. Research shows that many couples who live happily ever after see their relationship as a process or a journey. Try changing your perspective when looking for a soulmate, thinking that you're not looking for the perfect harmonious partner. Instead, you're looking for someone to live your life with, including accepting the positives and negatives that come with them. In other words, you should be looking for someone who can support each other so that both of you can get better, instead of looking for someone who was meant to meet you.

Considering life with a partner only as destiny and not as a journey will be very dangerous when there is a conflict or argument. If your relationship is pleasant, this condition is not too problematic

Step 2. Listen to your heart

Research shows that the conscience that appears towards a person is crucial to the success of a relationship. Don't ignore an instinct that pops up right away about someone. If it feels good, move on. However, if you're feeling uncomfortable or anxious about your relationship, it's a good idea to find another partner, even if everything seems fine on paper.

Step 3. Don't let the demand for perfection get in the way of the good

Perfection usually doesn't appear overnight, but it takes time. If you find a suitable person, but have a few flaws, try to look at the big picture. Two imperfect people can actually be in a perfect relationship!

This advice does not apply to “imperfections” that appear in the form of acts of violence or controlling behavior. You can cut ties with someone who likes to hurt, insult, or distance you from other people

Step 4. Cultivate friendships

After finding a suitable partner, try to strengthen the friendship between the two of you. Do activities together, talk about each other's life goals, identify each other's interests, and support each other. Couples who respect each other are usually more successful, romantic, and still love each other. Staying friends also makes couples more romantic (even after marriage!)

Step 5. Develop your relationship

Even if you've already met the ideal person, both of you will have to work hard to strengthen and develop this relationship to make it last. Maybe you should work things out, understand your partner's annoying habits, and forgive each other. In order for your relationship to last, there are some important things you must do:

Actively listening to your partner
Forgive your partner's small mistakes
Support your partner's hobbies and interests
Not in a relationship with other people (if you want to be in a monogamous relationship)
Saying thank you to your partner

Step 6. Go on a date with another couple

Dating with other partners will make your relationship more warm and intimate, especially when chatting about intimate topics with them. Invite two close friends over for dinner or join in a group activity so that everyone can get to know each other better. Let your friends support you both to become a true life partner.

Step 7. Do activities together

Relationships will be happier and more fulfilling when both of you can do activities together. Once you've found the perfect match, you can show your affection by giving a polite physical touch, putting your arm around the person's shoulder, or holding hands. Try making time to cook together, exercise together, or take your nephew to the mall. You can use these moments to get to know each other better and strengthen your relationship.

Step 8. Determine the purpose of life

The opinion that says that two people in pairs can shape each other's lives and goals is true. However, you also have to be honest with yourself about life and your own views on love. Think about what you want most in life and whether your partner can help you achieve this goal. Sometimes, love alone is not enough to maintain a relationship, but you both need to respect each other and share dreams. Please consider the following questions:

How important is my career and can my partner support me to advance in my career?
Do I want to have children after marriage? How about my partner?
Who will I be 5 years from now? 10 years? 20 years? Can I see my partner accompany me?
Do I and my partner feel happy living in a certain city/area? If your partner doesn't like living in a big city, but you can only live in a busy metropolis, maybe you should reconsider this relationship.

Step 9. Don't rekindle a broken relationship

There are couples who have broken up, but are back together again. Relationships like this can be a trap because of the combination of familiar patterns and certain pleasures. While fun, it can have negative consequences. Research shows that couples who are used to this pattern usually experience problems later in life. Keep in mind that repeated break-ups are not only a waste of valuable emotional time and energy, they are preventing you from meeting the right person.

Step 10. Notice if you feel calm and comfortable

If you have found a soulmate, you will feel at peace, happy, and confident that your relationship can survive and work well. You both have to support each other. But if this relationship makes you feel anxious, nervous, or fed up, you may not be in the right relationship. Remember that calm, comfort, and good relationships are far more important than fights, tension, and fear.

Tips

Be yourself. You will disappoint yourself and your partner if you pretend to be someone else. Work on becoming the person you want to be and prioritize your own life goals. In the end, you will soon meet someone who likes you for who you are in an unexpected way.
When you haven't found a partner, people will ask you why you are still single and think that something is "wrong" with you because you are "still" alone. Just ignore it and remember that you don't have to defend yourself. Have fun and develop yourself while waiting for the time to meet the right partner.
Don't be too picky. You are bound to fail if you always want to get the perfect partner. If you're hanging out with people who share your interests, start by picking one or two people to get to know you better. Maybe you will be surprised to find the most suitable partner.

Warning

Don't be too obsessive about finding a partner. People who seem desperate for love and are desperate for a lover will not be attractive to others and you will end up choosing a partner you don't want.
Being too idealistic will be very self-defeating because you become careless and don't pay attention to the danger signs. Know that there are hurting people who want to use your wishes for their own benefit. For example, if your friends and family members say that a certain person isn't right for you, don't argue with them. Maybe they mean well.
Do not confuse the chemical reactions of the body and destiny. When you meet someone and immediately feel attracted to them, your body will tell you that this person is your soulmate, but it's really just a hormonal reaction and the emergence of lust. The right partner might be someone you've known for a long time, but never thought about falling in love with. Be patient and consider carefully before deciding whether someone is right for you to choose as a partner.