Hanging out and making friends can be tricky, especially if you also want to be funny! Most people aren't funny from the start, and this kind of difficulty is normal in social situations. Fortunately, you can improve your social skills with a little practice. If you're ready to hang out and make friends, start by going to places where it's possible to meet new people and engage in fun activities. Apart from that, you should also practice starting a conversation, keeping the conversation flowing, and putting in some humor. Overcome nervousness by improving social skills and increasing self-confidence.
Step
Method 1 of 3: Fun Chat
Step 1. Introduce yourself to the person you meet to start a chat
State your name and other information about yourself. Say something you think is relevant to the situation. This will help you to start a chat.
You can say, “Hi, I'm Jovan. This is my first time to this event” or “Hi, my name is Lola. Hopefully there's a snack here."
Step 2. Give compliments and try to keep the conversation flowing
People love to hear good things about themselves. In addition, compliments will also make people think that you are good. Find reasons to praise. Then, continue the conversation with follow-up questions.
Say, “Your clothes are great! Where to buy?" or “Your story is funny! Did you finally find out, who's playing like that?"
Tip:
As a general rule, it's best to compliment something the person can control, such as hair, clothing, skills, and talents. Try not to compliment innate attributes, such as eye color or facial beauty. Physical compliments sometimes make some people uncomfortable.
Step 3. Ask something about the location or the weather to break the silence
Questions like these are easy small talk to start small talk with new people. Don't feel like you have to say something important. Just ask what was around you at the time. If you get a response, try to continue the conversation.
- It doesn't matter if the chat doesn't continue. Starting a chat can be like fishing, sometimes some eat the bait and sometimes others are not interested.
- For example, ask, “How did you get used to this heavy rain?” or “Have you been to this restaurant?”
Tip:
Try to ask open-ended questions that encourage people to keep talking. Open-ended questions require more than a “yes” or “no” answer to make it easier to continue the conversation.
Step 4. Show interest in the other person by asking something about him or her
People like to talk about themselves. So showing interest is a great way to continue the conversation. In addition, the other person will like you more because you are willing to listen. Ask open-ended questions, then listen to the answers with interest.
You can ask, “What do you usually do in your free time?”, “How did you know Sandi?” or “What was the last movie you watched?”
Step 5. Make fun of yourself and make people laugh
Self-deprecating humor makes others feel like you're equal to them and shows that you're an easygoing person. Blame yourself with jokes about quirks, mistakes, and things you love. Then, join in the laughter with those who hear it.
- For example, you spilled a drink. At that time, say while joking, "I'm sorry, but I do collect trophies for the stupidest person in the world, really."
- As another example, you might say, "I could have arrived earlier, but I had to call the fact-finding team to find my shoes because you guys know I'm the messiest person in the world."
- Use this kind of humor throughout the conversation, but don't overdo it. People may feel uncomfortable or perceive you negatively if you criticize yourself too much.
Step 6. Practice telling funny stories that can be used in chat
Telling jokes is a casual way to show that you are funny. Choose a story from your own experience or what happened to people you know. Then, practice until your delivery sounds natural.
- You can practice in front of a mirror or record it on video.
- Remember that you can repeat the same story to different people. So, don't feel like you have to always look for new stories.
Step 7. Learn replayable jokes
It's rare for people to be gifted with spontaneous humor. So you'd better prepare a list of top jokes. Read jokes online, watch stand-up comedy shows, or take comedy writing lessons. Practice your delivery so you can crack jokes at the right time. Here's an example of a joke that can be used:
- Why do people take taxis without paying the money first? Because the money was not sold before.
- There is a new restaurant called Karma. Been waiting for a long time the food didn't come. Why? Because we get what we deserve.
- I'm the best at sleeping. While closed you can.
- Why did God create two kidneys? Because if one name is odd.
Method 2 of 3: Meeting New People
Step 1. Attend local events to get more involved with the community
Check events in your city through news on the internet or info on social media, such as Facebook Events. In addition, you can also check the information on the bulletin boards of libraries, community centers, or coffee shops. Go to events that interest you so you can meet people with similar interests.
For example, visit art exhibitions, concerts, movie theaters, Sunday markets, and festivals
Tip:
Usually, it takes time to meet people who can be good friends. However, the more people you meet, the more likely you are to find good friends. Basically, just keep looking.
Step 2. Join a club related to your interests
Clubs are a fun way to meet people and make friends. Choose a club that focuses on activities you enjoy. Then, follow the meeting regularly. Chat with the people there and you will quickly make friends.
- If you're still in school, find an extracurricular club or social club.
- Also try searching for clubs on the internet. You can find interesting groups on sites like Meetup.com and Facebook.
Step 3. Take a course at a community center, nonprofit, or university
Look for courses by contacting your local community or college organization, or searching the internet. Choose a course in a field you are passionate about so you can meet people who share your interests. Then, attend all the sessions so you can get to know the people there.
Chances are, you won't be able to make friends right away on the first day. However, regular attendance will help you get to know your fellow participants so that you may become friends with them
Step 4. Try volunteering activities that interest you
You will meet fellow volunteers and community members who need help. This helps form friendships with people you have in common. Look for non-profit organizations or activist groups that work on activities that match your interests. Then, attend their events and meetings.
For example, volunteering at an animal shelter, distributing aid to disaster victims, or being a guide to a local museum
Step 5. Join an amateur sports team
Team sports are a great medium for making friends because they require interaction between you and your teammates. Find a local sports team by calling a community center, checking the bulletin board at the library, or online. Then, register yourself.
- Don't worry about whether you have to be good at the sport. Amateur sports are relaxed, suitable for all skill levels, and your teammates will help you get better.
- Maybe you can find a team that fits your experience level or age. For example, an amateur league in your area may have both novice and experienced teams. There may also be a split of teams by age group. Check with the administrator first to find out what options are available.
Step 6. Attend religious events or spiritual activities
You can make friends in religious activities. In addition, many religious or spiritual organizations hold social events for their members, and that means your opportunity to meet a lot of new people. Look for organizations in your area, then attend their events.
- If you are not very interested in religious activities, you can find an organization that shares your beliefs.
- Even if you are not interested in religious activities, you can still attend their events. For example, charity events, festivals, holiday celebrations, and carnivals that are open to the general public.
Method 3 of 3: Improve Sociability and Confidence
Step 1. Recognize your best qualities to increase self-esteem
Everyone is unique and interesting in their own way. To help you identify your best qualities, make a list of your talents, skills, and interests. In addition, choose the best physical qualities that you can highlight. Over time, all of these aspects will make you feel more confident.
- For example, write that you can play the guitar, like to read thrillers, love cats, and would rather stay at home than go out.
- Favorite physical qualities, like maybe eyes and feet.
Step 2. Display open body language, such as a smile and eye contact
When your body language is open, other people think you are more approachable. The easiest ways to appear more open are to smile, make eye contact, and tilt your chin. Also, avoid crossing your arms. Instead, drop your arms at your sides. When walking, make sure you have good posture by straightening your back and shoulders.
- When you hear someone talking, look at them and nod your head to show that you understand.
- If you are the one speaking, try moving your hand to engage the other person. It's best to practice on your own first so that later you can do it naturally in front of other people.
Step 3. Work on your sociability slowly so you have time to adjust
Learning to socialize can be difficult, and that's not a problem. Start with small things, like smiling with people who pass you. Then, try saying “hello”. When you're ready, start small talk by asking casually or observing something. After that, you can introduce yourself and ask open-ended questions.
- Don't worry about how long it will take you to get better at socializing. Give yourself as much time as needed.
- Choose short interactions to start. Once you're more comfortable, try to keep the conversation flowing.
Step 4. Focus on the other person, not the phone
If people feel neglected, they are usually reluctant to continue the conversation. However, if you focus on them, you will be perceived as more attractive and attentive. Turn off your phone when you're hanging out, and don't check notifications when you're chatting.
- If you have to check your phone regularly, set a specific time. For example, you can step away every hour to see notifications.
- If you must receive an urgent call, set the phone in "Do Not Disturb" mode and make an exception for the urgent number. For example, maybe you have to take a call from a babysitter.
Step 5. Eliminate the “must” from your life and choose what you really want
Maybe you feel like there are things you “should” be doing, like going out more, attending parties, or making friends with a lot of people. What matters most, however, is what you actually enjoy doing. Think about where you are most comfortable and what time-filling activities you enjoy the most. Then, replace that “must” with a goal that makes you happy.
- For example, you are an introvert who often thinks, "I should have been to parties more." If you don't like parties, don't push yourself. Maybe you'd rather enjoy an evening at the bookstore or watch a movie.
- It's the same if you're an extrovert who often reminds yourself, "I should have just one best friend instead of many close friends." If lots of friends make you happy, that's the most important thing.
Step 6. Be yourself so people know the real you
It's hard to make new friends if you pretend to be someone else. Although people will like it, the friendship itself will be difficult to maintain. On the other hand, you must honestly present yourself as you are in order to meet the right person. In addition, respect other people, then they will also respect you.
- Speak your mind when you care about an issue.
- Try new hobbies and interests, but be honest about what you enjoy doing.
- Wear clothes that make you happy, not ones that impress other people. At the same time, don't be afraid to try something new.
Tips
- Watch funny movies or stand-up comedy to enrich your sense of humor.
- People are usually too self-focused to judge you. So don't worry about other people's judgments.
- Don't say something just to sound smart or funny. Most people prefer to be friends with people who are sincere, not people who want to show off. Make sure your humor comes out naturally and isn't forced.
Warning
- Avoid vulgar and offensive jokes so no one is offended.
- Try to avoid sensitive topics, such as politics and religion, when chatting with new people. The risk is that you unknowingly offended someone with a different opinion.
