Have you been secretly in love with someone but somehow the feeling "leaked" into the ears of the idol of the heart? Is there anything worse than this dire situation? Do not rush to panic! First of all, you need to decide on your next step: do you want to be honest about your feelings or pretend you don't know and keep your feelings inside for him? So what are the next steps? Read on for this article to find out!
Step
Method 1 of 2: Controlling Yourself Nearby
Step 1. Do not stop telling him the things that color your daily life
If your crush knows how you feel, try not to make the relationship between you feel awkward and uncomfortable. Try to stay as natural as possible; for example, if you take the same class as her at school, feel free to discuss schoolwork or exam materials with her. Trust me, being as casual as possible will facilitate the process of interaction between the two of you in the future.
Remember, he may not be aware that you know he already knows how you feel.. By being casual, you are actually giving yourself extra time to process the situation
Step 2. Try not to dwell on the situation all the time
Trust me, doing it is the worst move you can make! Try to keep yourself busy with your daily activities. If you want, you can even avoid it for a day or two to cool off; but make sure you don't stay out of it for too long if you don't want to actually move on without it.
Try not to think of the situation as a “problem”. If you found out someone likes you, would you be angry? Most likely the answer is 'no', right? Most likely he also felt the same way
Step 3. Don't worry about everyone he talks to
Liking someone can make even the most rational human being defeated by the fire of jealousy. Try not to worry too much about the women he's talking to or seeming to have a close relationship with. Most likely, he doesn't mean to push or hurt your feelings, but simply to be friendly and welcoming to those around him.
He may not be talking about you either, so don't be paranoid and think, "He must be leaking my feelings to everyone!". If he wasn't the childish type of person, chances are that the idea wouldn't even have crossed his mind
Step 4. Remember, she can get nervous too
After all, the person you like is still an ordinary person who is capable of feeling various emotional spikes. In other words, the things that make you nervous may also make him nervous. Since he knows how you feel, he's more likely to feel awkward when it comes to communicating with you! Trust me, considering these possibilities will make it easier for you to communicate with him in the future; Can you imagine how terrifying it would be to have a conversation with someone who turns out to be just as nervous as you?
Method 2 of 2: Taking Action
Step 1. Decide if you want to convey your feelings to him
Sooner or later, you will have to decide on the next step; do you want to keep your feelings hidden or convey your feelings to your crush? Trust me, being in an uncertain situation will make you feel very uncomfortable. Making decisions can feel scary, but at least you'll find it easier to move on afterward, right?
- Ideally, telling the truth is the best course of action. Generally, a person will definitely feel more relieved after honestly conveying his feelings to the person he likes; whatever the outcome, at least you've tried to be honest with yourself. By doing so, you will also avoid the disappointment of being haunted by the question, "What would have happened if I had been honest?" Try explaining to him that you don't want to ruin your friendship or feel awkward after the confession. Chances are, he'll accept your confession with an open mind and be willing to keep the relationship as normal as possible while contemplating his next move.
- On the other hand, if you don't really want to convey your feelings to him (or don't think it's a good idea), there's no need to feel like you 'have to' do so. For example, if your crush already likes someone else, there's no need to feel 'obligated' to share your feelings because that's actually a bad idea.
Step 2. If you want to confess your feelings to the person you like, do it as soon as possible
Don't waste time searching for the “best time” because that time will never come. If you're constantly procrastinating, chances are he'll lose interest or think you don't like him anymore! Try to choose a time and place that feels right to you, and don't change your mind after that. Believe me, the best results will come if you are willing to maximize the opportunities that exist!
If your crush is a schoolmate or coworker, try asking them to meet in a more private place after school or work. There is no need to choose a completely deserted and secluded place; just find a place that is quite quiet and private like a small bench in a city park
Step 3. Keep the situation casual
Communicating your feelings to the person you like doesn't need to be dramatic. If you overdo it, you're more likely to scare him off. Keep the situation casual and stress-free between the two of you; surely he will find it easier to open up to you afterwards.
You don't even have to openly admit your feelings. Instead, try taking her out on a casual trip together. For example, you could start the conversation by saying, “Spanish class was so much fun! You want to accompany me to the Spanish art exhibition next week? As far as I know, the food sold there is delicious."
Step 4. Don't be swayed by his shyness
Even if you're being very casual, there's still a chance for embarrassment. Don't worry about it! Don't take his silence or awkwardness as a sign that he doesn't like you; at times, silence or awkwardness is actually a sign that he's having a hard time conveying what's on his mind. Therefore, give as much time as possible so that he is able to digest your words and is ready to provide answers.
Don't make him feel rushed to give a quick answer. Remember, he needs time to process your request. Try saying, “Just think about it. You don't have to answer now, really."
Step 5. Accept his decision (even if he rejects you)
Appreciate her willingness to make decisions and not rely on your feelings. Even if he says 'no', give a casual response like 'Oh, okay', then walk away from him. Don't overwhelm him with questions or force him to change his mind. On the other hand, if he accepts your date, congratulations!
After receiving a rejection, try to reduce the number of times you see him or her for at least a few days. Of course you don't have to completely ignore its existence; just stay away for a while until your sadness subsides and your emotions are back under control
Tips
- If you're a woman, don't fall for the common belief that women shouldn't ask men out. In this modern era, you can also take the initiative first, you know!
- Don't offend other women with whom he communicates frequently. Don't show jealousy if you don't want to be seen as intimidating.
- Don't make him feel guilty for not being able to reciprocate your feelings; Did you know that some human feelings are genetically defined? After all, you don't know if he had any personal experiences that influenced his decision.
- Control yourself and don't be aggressive with people who tell them how you feel.
