Everyone has experienced sadness at some point in their life. Research has shown that sadness usually lasts longer than other emotions because we tend to think about sadness all the time. Being morose or constantly thinking about your sadness and experiencing it over and over again can lead to depression and make you unable to cope with your sadness. There are several things you can do to get through difficult times.
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Method 1 of 5: Dealing with Sadness
Step 1. Cry
Some studies state that crying can relax the body by releasing endorphins, the body's natural chemicals that can provide "feel good". By crying, you activate the parasympathetic nerves which will restore your body from stress and trauma.
- Some studies suggest that crying is a very beneficial body mechanism for dealing with sadness because it can communicate suffering to others. It can also move others to provide support.
- Dr. William Frey put forward the idea that was very popular in the media that crying could flush toxins out of the body. This idea may be true, but the amount of toxins lost by crying is negligible because most of the tears are reabsorbed by the nasal cavity.
- One study suggests that feeling better after crying has something to do with how your culture views crying. If your culture (or even your family) views the habit of crying as embarrassing, you probably won't feel better after crying.
- There's no need to cry if you don't want to cry. Even though you're popular advice that says it's unhealthy not to cry after a sad event, this is not true. Crying as a necessity will only hinder recovery.
Step 2. Exercise
Several studies have shown that exercise will trigger the production of endorphins and other body chemicals that are useful for dealing with sadness. A study showed that participants who exercised at moderate intensity for 10 weeks felt more energetic, positive, and calm than those who did not exercise. In addition, exercise can provide greater benefits for people who are experiencing depression.
- Exercise can also be an opportunity to practice focusing on a specific goal and distract yourself from sadness.
- You don't have to train for a marathon or visit the gym every day to experience the benefits of exercise. Light activities such as gardening and walking also have a positive effect.
Step 3. Smile
Several studies have shown that smiling can make you feel better, even when you're feeling down. A Duchenne smile or a smile that activates the muscles around your eyes and mouth has the strongest positive effect on your mood. Be a smiley person and keep smiling even when you are sad. Even if it's unpleasant at first, it can help you feel more positive.
Research has also proven two contradictory things: people who frown when they're not happy are actually less happy than those who don't
Step 4. Listen to music
You will feel calmer and more relaxed by listening to music. The reasons that make you want to listen to music are just as important as what kind of music you listen to. Listening to your favorite “beautiful but sad” classical music can overcome the sadness you are feeling.
- Using music to reminisce about a sad situation or experience is not a good way. According to research, this method actually makes you sadder. Choosing beautiful music is the best way to get rid of sadness.
- If sadness is really stressing you out, the British Academy of Sound Therapy has scientifically created “the world's most relaxing music.” The songs with this musical accompaniment were performed by Enya, Airstream, Marconi Union, and Coldplay.
Step 5. Soak in warm water
Research has shown that feeling warm that is experienced physically can provide a sense of comfort. Soaking in warm water or taking a warm bath can relax you and ease your sadness.
Method 2 of 5: Coping With Sadness
Step 1. Acknowledge how you are feeling
Sadness is natural and can even bring good. Research has shown that experiencing a variety of feelings including negative ones is very important for mental well-being. Some research shows that apologizing or suppressing feelings can actually amplify negative feelings.
Acknowledge your emotions without judging yourself. You may be thinking, "This is no big deal, why should I feel sad?" But it would be better if you can accept the emotions you are feeling as they are so that you can manage them properly
Step 2. Divert your thoughts
Research has shown that continuing to be gloomy or lingering in sadness can actually hinder recovery. Try to overcome the sadness by not thinking about it anymore and not being depressed.
- Do the things you love. You can deal with sadness by doing the things you enjoy, even if you don't like it at first. Take a walk, take an art class, find a new hobby, or learn to play classical guitar. Try to get yourself to do whatever makes you feel good.
- Interact with friends. Interaction with people you love can increase the production of the hormone oxytocin in your body. Go to the movies, have a cup of coffee, or go on a blind date. Research has shown that withdrawing from others can worsen symptoms of depression, including sadness.
Step 3. Practice calming the mind
Peace of mind requires the ability to acknowledge what you are going through and accept this experience without judging it or judging yourself. Research has shown that practicing calming your mind can change the way your brain responds to sadness. This exercise can also more quickly recover you from grief.
You can break the habit of being gloomy by practicing calming your mind because this practice will help you focus your attention on the current situation
Step 4. Practice meditation
One technique of calming the mind is practicing mindfulness meditation. Several studies have shown that mindfulness meditation can reduce the brain's response to negative emotional stimuli.
- Mindfulness meditation will also reduce symptoms of depression and anxiety.
- Practicing basic mindfulness meditation will take 15 minutes. Find a quiet and comfortable place to meditate. You can sit on a chair or on the floor with your legs crossed. Wear clothes that are not too tight and try to make yourself comfortable.
- Focus your attention on one aspect of your breathing, such as the rising and falling of your chest as you breathe in or the sensation you feel in your nostrils as the air is flowing. Try to concentrate by focusing your attention on these things.
- Inhale deeply through the nose. Allow your stomach to relax and expand as you inhale and then exhale as long as you can through your mouth.
- Continue to breathe with this breathing technique while expanding your focus of attention. Pay attention to any sensations you feel, such as the feeling of clothes touching your skin or observing the rhythm of your heartbeat.
- Acknowledge each of these sensations, but don't judge them. Return your focus to the breath again if your attention is distracted.
Step 5. Practice yoga or tai chi
Yoga and tai chi have been shown to relieve stress and improve mood. This benefit may be gained through the emphasis on “self-awareness” in the practice. Many studies have shown that yoga and tai chi can reduce physical and psychological suffering.
Practicing with other people can provide more relief than practicing alone at home
Method 3 of 5: Recognizing and Coping With Grief due to Grief and Loss
Step 1. Know what can cause someone to grieve
Grief is the sadness that is felt when someone loses something or someone very precious in his life. Everyone feels grieving in different ways, but basically, grief is a natural reaction to loss. A person can feel lost, among others because:
- Losing a loved one such as a friend, family, or lover
- A loved one has a serious illness
- Breakup
- Losing a pet
- Leaving home or moving to a new house
- Loss of job or business
- Losing things that are important or have their own meaning
- Loss of physical ability
Step 2. Identify normal reactions to grief
Everyone will react to grief and loss in their own way. There is no “right” way of grieving. Some of the reactions that arise as a result of loss can be:
- Disbelief. It's very hard to accept loss when it happens to someone. You might think "This can't be happening" or "This wouldn't happen to people like me."
- Confusion. You may find it difficult to concentrate when you experience loss. It could also be that you have dementia or have difficulty expressing your thoughts and feelings.
- Loss of feeling or numbness. You may not be able to feel any emotions when you have just experienced grief. This is your brain's way of protecting you from feeling too overwhelmed by this event.
- Worry. It's normal to feel anxious, nervous, or worried after a loss, especially if it happened suddenly.
- Relief. This emotion can make people feel embarrassed, but it is a natural response. There can be relief when a loved one finally passes away in peace after a long illness. Don't judge yourself for this feeling.
- Physical symptoms. There are a variety of physical symptoms that may appear if you experience loss. These physical symptoms can include shortness of breath, headache, nausea, weakness, and fatigue. You can also experience difficulty sleeping or sleepiness continues.
Step 3. Don't judge your feelings
People who have lost material or pets are usually embarrassed to feel the loss as if they “shouldn't” be grieving the loss. Just ignore this "need" and accept the loss you are experiencing. There is never anything wrong with grieving the loss of something or someone very precious to you.
- Research has shown that the death of a beloved pet can cause as much grief as the loss of a family member.
- The American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals (ASPCA) has a 24-hour telephone service for people who have lost their pets. The ASPCA can also help if you need to euthanize a sick animal, deal with the loss of a pet, and love an animal you're just starting to raise. If you live in the US, you can call the ASPCA at 1-877-GRIEF-10.
Step 4. Know the stages to go through when grieving
Almost everyone experiences grief in five stages: rejection, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. But not everyone goes through these stages sequentially. In general, grief will be passed little by little through the stages that form a cycle over time.
- These stages are not decisive. Try to identify and deal with your grief by understanding these stages. Don't let your situation dictate how you feel and never feel guilty for feeling sad.
- The stages may not be mutually exclusive. You may experience several stages at the same time or none at all. There is no single experience of loss that can be called normal. Each person will deal with grief in a way that is most appropriate and unique to each one.
Step 5. Know what rejection means
Usually rejection occurs as the first reaction to a sense of loss or bad news which often manifests in numbness. Rejection can also appear in the form of thoughts that say "This is not real," or "I can't deal with this situation", even "I feel fine."
- The thoughts that arise in the rejection stage are usually the wish that “all this is just a dream”.
- Don't confuse numbness with "don't care." Rejection is your mind's way of protecting you from intense emotions when you have to adjust to a new situation. You can really care about someone but still react as numb or in denial.
Step 6. Know what anger means
Anger is another natural reaction to loss. These feelings can manifest through thoughts saying “This is unfair” or “Why is this happening to me?” and maybe you'll find someone or something you can blame for the loss. Anger is a common response when you feel as though you are losing control of a certain situation. This response also usually occurs if you feel like you are being hurt.
Talk about your anger with a counselor and/or support group for people experiencing bereavement because it can be very difficult to deal with anger alone. Find people you can talk to who don't judge your anger and can help you deal with it
Step 7. Know what it means to bargain
In the bargaining stage, thoughts and feelings usually appear some time after the loss has occurred. These thoughts can tell you what “you could actually do” to prevent the loss from happening and make you feel very guilty. Maybe you will imagine going back in time and doing in a different way so that this loss does not happen.
You should also seek help at this stage. It can be hard to heal yourself if you can't get over the guilt. Talk to a mental health professional about your condition or find a support group for people experiencing bereavement
Step 8. Know what depression means
Depression is a very common reaction to loss. Recovery from depression can occur in a short time but can also be quite long. You should consult a mental health professional to deal with depression. If left unchecked, depression will get worse. Symptoms of depression can include:
- Fatigue
- Irregular sleep patterns
- Feelings of guilt, helplessness, or worthlessness
- Feelings of fear and sadness
- Feelings of not being connected to other people
- Headaches, cramps, muscle aches, and other physical aches
- Not feeling good about the things you used to like
- Changes from a “normal” mood (easier irritability, mania, etc.)
- Irregular eating pattern
- Suicidal thoughts or desires
- It is difficult to distinguish between grief during grieving and clinical depression. People who are grieving may experience all of these symptoms. However, a person usually experiences clinical depression if he or she is contemplating suicide or making plans to commit suicide. If you have suicidal thoughts, seek medical attention immediately.
Step 9. Ask friends and family for help
It will help you to talk about your grief with those closest to you. Sharing your feelings of sadness with others will reduce the intensity of your sadness.
Step 10. Give yourself time
You have to have a lot of patience and be kind to yourself because it may take some time to recover from the loss. You should also take the time to reach the "acceptance" stage as the final stage of grieving.
Method 4 of 5: Recognizing and Coping with Clinical Depression
Step 1. Compare clinical depression and “grief”
Clinical depression is much more severe than sadness or “feeling down”. Depression is a serious health problem and requires proper treatment because people with depression cannot heal on their own.
- Sadness is a natural human emotion. Grief can arise in response to a loss or because of an unpleasant or uncomfortable event. Feelings of sadness or "down" are usually not permanent, can appear at any time and then disappear again because these feelings are triggered by certain experiences or events.
- Clinical depression is more severe than sadness because this problem is not just a mood disorder that people can "go through" easily. This disorder does not go away on its own and is usually almost unchanged or persistent because it is not triggered by a particular event or experience. Clinical depression can be very burdensome for a person because it creates many obstacles in daily life.
Step 2. Recognize the symptoms of clinical depression
Clinical depression can manifest in a variety of ways that usually greatly interfere with your daily activities, cause severe stress, or an inability to function. However, you may not experience any of the symptoms of this disorder. You can be said to have clinical depression if you frequently experience five or more of the following symptoms:
- Changes in sleep patterns
- Changes in diet
- Inability to focus or concentrate, “feeling confused”
- Fatigue or lack of energy
- Loss of interest in the things you used to like
- Quickly irritated, restless, or unable to feel calm
- Weight gain or loss
- Feeling hopeless, hopeless, or feeling worthless
- Physical aches, pains, headaches, cramps, and other physical symptoms with no apparent cause
Step 3. Find out what causes depression
Many things cause depression and researchers aren't entirely sure how they work either. Childhood trauma can change the way your brain deals with fear and stress. Many studies suggest that clinical depression may be genetically inherited. Life changes that occur, such as the loss of a loved one or going through a divorce, can trigger major depression.
- Clinical depression is a complex disorder. One of the causes of clinical depression is the occurrence of problems with neurotransmitters in the brain such as an imbalance of the hormones serotonin and dopamine. Medication can regulate chemicals in the body and treat depression.
- Abuse of certain substances such as excessive alcohol consumption or drug use is closely related to depression.
- Some studies say that lesbians, homosexuals, and bisexuals can experience more severe depression. This is due to the lack of social and personal support in their lives.
Step 4. Discuss the matter with your doctor
You should consult a doctor if there are symptoms of depression that interfere with your daily activities. The doctor will prescribe an antidepressant drug that is efficacious as a hormone regulator in the brain that will affect your mood.
- You must honestly explain to your doctor all the symptoms you are experiencing. There are several types of antidepressant drugs. Your doctor can only determine the most appropriate antidepressant if you are honest about what you're going through.
- Your body will respond to medications in a variety of ways. You should still consult with your doctor until you can find the most appropriate antidepressant medication. If you have been using certain medications for several months and your condition has not improved, consult your doctor again.
- Do not change or stop taking antidepressant medications without consulting your doctor first, as they can cause serious health problems and mood disorders.
- If you are already taking antidepressants but are still having problems, you should consult a psychiatrist. A psychiatrist is a medical doctor who has undergone special education as a psychiatrist so that he can determine the more appropriate treatment for you.
Step 5. Seek help from a mental health professional
Because there are so many causes of depression, you should seek the help of an expert who can understand and recognize your emotions. Medication combined with psychiatric therapy will usually be better than just taking medication.
- There are two myths about depression. First, you must "ignore" it and second, seeking help means showing weakness. This opinion is not true at all. Acknowledging that you need help recovering your health is a sign of strength and self-care.
- There are several types of mental health professionals. Only psychiatrists and psychiatric nurse practitioners may prescribe medications and perform psychiatric therapy.
- Psychologists have a doctorate in psychology (clinically, educationally, and counseling) and have attended education with a specialization in the field of therapy. The cost of treatment at a psychologist is usually not as expensive as at a psychiatrist, but more expensive than other options.
- A Social Worker who opens a licensed clinical social worker (LCSW) has a master's degree as a social worker. They can provide psychiatric therapy services and help you get support from the community. LCSW usually work in health clinics and university medical centers.
- Licensed Marriage and Family Therapists have completed special education to deal with problems faced by couples or within the family and some provide individualized psychological therapy.
- Licensed Professional Counselors (LPC) have a master's degree in counseling. They have been educated under supervision in providing mental health services and work in community health clinics.
Step 6. Contact your insurance company
If you have an insurance policy in the US, you should contact your insurance company to find out what mental health services you can get. There are insurance companies that ask for references from health experts. Some companies only provide health protection with certain services.
Step 7. Stay close to family and friends
Withdrawing from social relationships is a common symptom of depression. After all, you will feel better if you are always close to the people you love. They can support and love you.
Maybe you will “feel bad” about meeting and interacting with other people. You should try to encourage yourself to keep in touch with other people, because depression will only get worse if you keep social distancing
Step 8. Adopt a good diet
You can't "cure" depression simply by changing your diet, but you can choose foods that make you feel better.
- Choose foods with complex carbohydrates such as whole grains, brown rice, beans, and lentils. Foods with complex carbohydrates will make you feel full longer and can regulate blood sugar levels.
- Reduce consumption of sugar and simple carbohydrates because it only makes you feel "comfortable" for a moment but after that it actually worsens symptoms of depression.
- Eat a variety of fruits and vegetables that contain many nutrients such as vitamin C and beta-carotene. In addition, fruits and vegetables are a source of antioxidants that free your body from free radicals that interfere with the body's work.
- Sufficient protein needs of your body. Several studies have shown that more protein intake can increase alertness and improve your mood.
- Take supplements of omega 3 fatty acids found in nuts, flaxseed oil and soybeans, and eat dark green vegetables. Omega 3 is also found in fatty tuna, salmon, and sardines. Some research suggests that you consume more fatty acids to prevent depression.
Step 9. Get enough sleep
Depression often interferes with sleep patterns. Try to get about eight hours of sleep at night. Establish healthy sleep patterns such as going to bed at the same time and watching less TV before bed.
- People with chronic insomnia are more at risk for clinical depression.
- Apnea is a breathing disorder during sleep that is also associated with clinical depression.
Step 10. Exercise
If you're depressed, you probably won't like going out and exercising. However, several studies have shown that exercise can improve your mood. Try exercising by doing moderate-intensity physical activity every day. Practicing body strengthening at least twice a week can also help with clinical depression.
- Some studies say that depression will decrease if you exercise regularly.
- People who are obese are more prone to depression. Scientists don't really know the link but exercise can treat obesity and depression.
Method 5 of 5: Recognizing and Overcoming SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder)
Step 1. Recognize the symptoms of SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) or affective disorder due to changing seasons
SAD is a type of depression caused by a biochemical imbalance in the body due to seasonal changes. In some places, usually located some distance from the equator, there will be a lack of sunlight for several months in the fall and winter. This can change chemical processes in the body and can cause the same symptoms as clinical depression. for example:
- Low energy or fatigue
- Difficulty concentrating
- Increased appetite
- Prefer to isolate yourself or be alone
- Disturbed sleep pattern, feeling very sleepy
- SAD usually occurs between the ages of 18 and 30.
- You may prefer to eat foods that contain carbohydrates if you have SAD. thus gaining weight.
Step 2. Seek professional help for treatment
Treatment of SAD is the same as treatment for clinical depression. Medications used as antidepressants and professional therapy can also treat SAD.
Step 3. Try light therapy
Light therapy will reset your body clock. This therapy is carried out with the help of 10,000 Lux lamps that you can buy in stores and online (Lux is a unit of light intensity.)
- Look up information about the manufacturer of the lamp to make sure that the lamp you are using is specifically designed for SAD therapy. There are several types of lamps to treat skin problems will emit more ultraviolet rays that can damage your eyes.
- Light therapy is usually safer. But if you have bipolar affective disorder, talk to your doctor before you start light therapy.
- Light therapy can also cause complications for people with lupus, skin cancer, or eye disorders.
Step 4. Get more sun
Your mood will be better if you get more sun exposure. Open your curtains and window blinds. Do outdoor activities if you can.
Step 5. Make your room brighter
Painting walls with lighter colors can reflect sunlight. Decorating the room with bright colors that you like can also improve your mood.
Step 6. Enjoy the winter
If you live in a location that experiences winter, try to find aspects of winter that you can enjoy. Try warming yourself in front of the fire, roasting marshmallows, drinking hot chocolate (but don't overdo it, of course).
Step 7. Exercise
Just like how to treat clinical depression, you can relieve the symptoms of SAD with exercise. If you live in a location that experiences winter, try participating in snow sports such as ice skiing or walking in snow.
Step 8. Try natural remedies
Consult a doctor before you use natural medicines because there are drugs that can interfere with the doctor's treatment or cause complications.
- Try melatonin which can help you sleep regularly. Melatonin supplements can regulate disturbed sleep patterns due to SAD.
- Try St. John. There is some evidence that the herb St. John was able to overcome the symptoms of mild depression. This herb can limit the effectiveness of treatment from doctors such as birth control pills, heart drugs, and cancer drugs. Herbs of St. John also should not be used together with SSRIs, tricyclics, or other antidepressant drugs because they can cause serotonin syndrome. Do not take the herb St. John before consulting a doctor.
Step 9. Go on vacation in a place with lots of sun
If you live in an area that gets very little sun during the winter, try vacationing in a place with lots of sun. You can vacation in Bali or Bunaken where there is almost always sunshine (unless it is the rainy season).
Tips
- Taking time for relaxation and fun activities is very important so that you can feel better.
- Help others by doing things that matter to them. When you help others, happiness will usually rub off on you. Giving is the best way to make you smile.
- If you like religious or spiritual ways, do things that make you feel comfortable according to your traditions. This method can overcome the sadness you feel.
- Always think positive and be kind. Don't overanalyze. Strive for more giving than receiving.
Warning
- Do not change or stop taking antidepressant medication without consulting your doctor first, because it can cause serious health problems and can even cause a person to commit suicide.
- If the sadness you are feeling makes you think you want to hurt yourself or others or if you are thinking or planning to kill yourself, seek help immediately. You can contact the nearest help center. If you live in the US, call the suicide prevention center which provides 24-hour service daily at 1-800-273-8255 or emergency services 911. If you live in Indonesia, call Halo Kemkes at (local code) 500567.
