Letting go of someone you love can be very difficult. Change can be tough, especially when it means letting go of someone you love and care deeply about. However, once you realize that it's time to let go, you can start salvaging the situation and working to build a new beginning and a new possible persona.
Step
Method 1 of 2: Self-Assessment
Step 1. Realize reality
Unfortunately, people often know that they have to give up, but are unable to because they fear the consequences. Understanding reality will help you realize that it's time to let go of a relationship that has been damaged.
- To understand reality, try to put yourself in the shoes of the other person observing your situation. What does this person think about the situation? Was the answer clear to him? If so, you probably already know what to do.
- If you're having trouble removing yourself from the situation and looking at it from a third-person perspective, try changing the names of the characters involved in your story. Change your real name to someone else's name. Also, change the little traits about yourself that make the "you" in this story less like you. The point is to try to reduce the distance between yourself and this other "you" character. Do the same for the person you are trying to stay away from.
- Or imagine your story happening to a friend and their partner. What advice would you give? Would you tell the friend it was time for him to move forward?
Step 2. Get other people's points of view
Ask a friend (or parent/counselor if you are comfortable). Ask him what he would do if he were in your position and if he has been in a similar situation in the past.
- Make sure to be sincere with him, that you won't judge him for his answers, that you're only seeking the truth of the matter and not because you want to feel better.
- Ask him if he really thinks your plan is worth it. Ask if you played a part in making the relationship go bad.
- Use this site to find a therapist:
Step 3. Analyze the situation
Write down your feelings in a diary where you can pour your thoughts. Know that you, and only you, will be reading this diary so you must be completely honest in it. Look for patterns in the things you write. Do you often find yourself blaming yourself? If so, ask yourself if there's any real benefit to blaming yourself or if your partner has a bigger role to play.
- You can ask yourself some specific questions in the diary that can help you clarify whether it's time to leave. Does your partner keep explaining that he is afraid to commit or is he trying to put pressure on you by threatening to end the relationship? Is your partner jealous of your success instead of being happy for you? Is your partner cheating on you? Do you and your partner need very different degrees of intimacy? If you've written and thought about these questions and answered yes to any of them, this is a sign that it's time to leave. Journaling about your relationship can also help you deal with a breakup if you end up going down that path.
- After writing down your thoughts and rereading them, take a few steps back and read them again the next day from a new perspective. If the same pattern still stands out, chances are that the thought is correct.
Step 4. Know when idealism is holding you back
For example, if you want perfection in your relationship and aren't willing to compromise for anything less, you may be the one having the problem in the relationship, not your partner. In this case, you should try to think about how you can change for the relationship to work.
- Be honest with your partner and let them know that you struggle with having unfair ideals and that you want to work on making the relationship work. Perhaps he will respect your openness and honesty and be willing to go the extra mile to help your cause.
- To find out if idealism is holding you back, ask friends, family, or acquaintances for advice who doesn't take sides. Let these people consider whether you are being unrealistic or whether your view of the relationship or the partner's "faults" is worth it.
- You can also ask yourself the following questions:
- Do you hold onto the (unrealistic) expectation that you should get sexual gratification whenever you feel you need it?
- Do you hold the (unrealistic) expectation that your partner will have to fulfill your every request?
- Do you expect your partner to meet your every need?
Step 5. Realize that inattention is a red flag
If you find that you don't want to spend time with your partner, or don't really care about their daily life, or no longer respect their opinions, you may have stopped falling in love. These signals can be a sign that it's time to let go.
While it can be difficult to let someone go, don't allow yourself to feel guilty; it's better to let him find someone who will truly love and care for him than to stay with him just because he feels guilty
Method 2 of 2: Assessing Your Relationship
Step 1. Look for signs
The indications can vary, but a few warning signs can show you that it's time to let go and break the relationship. Look for consistent patterns of jealousy, anxiety, arguing, boredom, and discomfort or unhappiness.
All of these can be red flags that indicate an unhealthy relationship. Arguing once in a while is normal and healthy, but there is a clear line between good and bad
Step 2. Be aware of frequent fights
If you're always fighting for trivial reasons, it could be that the person is no longer interested in you and/or has lost feelings for you. Granted, this isn't a sure sign that something is wrong in the relationship because multiple partners are fighting, but it could be a sign of deeper relationship problems. Don't let petty or petty squabbles cause your relationship to break down, but if there's been too much fighting between the two of you, it may be time to let it go.
If you find yourself thinking about ending things because of too many fights, you can ask yourself a few questions. Why are you fighting? What are you arguing about? Have you ever had a fight over this or is this a new fight? If you find yourself fighting to hurt your partner, or find that you are fighting over petty issues, or are repeatedly getting into the same fights because both of you are having a hard time resolving your differences, this may be a sign that it's time to move on with your life. himself
Step 3. Notice the persistent presence of irritation
When both parties are upset with each other, they show no signs of love or attraction. You'll know when your partner is irritated because of you, when everything you do never seems right or enough in his eyes, or when he just feels embarrassed by some of your public actions (he should love you no matter what you do).
Remember that you should pay attention to persistent irritation or a pattern of irritation that is usually repetitive. Don't jump to conclusions from just one incident, and don't get frustrated with your partner from time to time
Step 4. Watch for any loss of communication
For a relationship to work, both parties must discuss issues and ideas. If your partner is no longer talking to you, you may want to consider that it's time to let him go (he should be honest about his feelings and thoughts). This means that a lack of emotional expression and communication can be a sign that it's time to let it go.
However, if you're having a serious problem and you love this person consider visiting a relationship counselor and sharing the different emotions each of you is feeling
Step 5. Listen to your partner
If he's brave enough to tell you that he no longer wants to be in a relationship with you, listen. This can be one of the hardest and hardest things to hear; But honesty never hurts as much as a lie.
Hearing that you are no longer loved by someone you spent time with is never easy; however, in the long run you'll be better off with someone who truly loves you for who you are
Step 6. Watch for signs of cheating
Maybe he's texting a lot with someone you've never met, or he comes home late at night smelling foreign perfume. Or, his profile on a dating site is back online with up-to-date photos, or he's frequently texting flirty messages on Facebook; if any of these happen, chances are he's cheating on you or is planning to do so.
- Don't humble yourself by sticking with a cheater. At the first confirmation that he is cheating, leave him immediately. You deserve better. Forget him and try your best to forgive him. Otherwise, he will control your emotions.
- If you are no longer happy with him and feel that the happy moments together are getting lost, break up immediately and let him know. Always find the truth about yourself and for him too. Determine what is good for both of you.
Tips
- Do what you feel is right, not what your friends suggest. This situation concerns your life. Therefore, while you may receive a lot of advice, including this article, do what feels right to you after weighing all the advice.
- Just take it slow and be as sure as you can about your decision before making it. If you're not ready to let him go or find that your reasons don't match the ones listed above, don't let him go or you could end up ruining the relationship.
- Letting go can be very difficult, but you have to face reality. Yes, you want to be happy, but you can't find that happiness if you're still attached to something or someone that hurts you.
- Make sure that you are not fickle in your decisions. One of the quickest ways to lose someone's respect is to make a statement and then take it back. If you have made a decision, be prepared and never break it.
- Missing your ex is only part of the letting go. Give it enough time and your wounds will heal.
- When the relationship hurts more than makes you happy, it's time for you to let go.
- Don't forget to take care and love yourself first. Letting go of someone might hurt them, but you have to think about yourself.
Warning
- Don't crawl back to this person or you'll most likely get caught in a wave of feelings that don't end well.
- Talking to your partner before you let go can be a good idea. It's possible that his behavior is related to something outside of you, such as work. If that's the case, you certainly don't want to ruin a relationship just because of your wrong judgment.
