Maybe you feel nervous at times – sweaty, shaking, hot, and miserable.. Maybe you're having a job interview or waiting for your grades to be announced at school. Sometimes it's okay to let other people know how you feel; they may be supportive and understanding and may be able to help. Other times, though, you don't want people to know that you're feeling nervous. Fortunately, there are a number of ways to hide your nervousness.
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Part 1 of 3: Looks in Place
Step 1. Realize that you don't look as nervous as you feel
Remember that in most circumstances, people don't know what's on your mind. While you may be showing signs of nervousness, you may not appear as nervous as you feel.
- Keep in mind the 'spotlight effect' which may make you think that other people are paying more attention to you than they really are, simply because you are looking around from your point of view, so it can sometimes feel like everything is focusing on you.
- However, if there are 10 people in a room, the other people will probably appear balanced in the presence of the other people there, which means, in most cases, you and your nervousness, won't get much attention.
Step 2. Broaden your posture
Sometimes called posing, people who display a broadened posture will actually feel more powerful and appear to be more confident in front of others. This is a 'fake it till it works' idea-and research shows it can be used to help you look and feel confident, thereby reducing nervousness.
- To widen your posture, extend your arms and/or legs, puff out your chest, and/or lift your head back slightly.
- If possible, go to an enclosed area, such as the bathroom, to do this pose without worrying about being seen by others.
- If you can't go to an enclosed space, you can still widen your posture. For example, if you're sitting, take up more space by spreading your legs apart on the table or leaning back and spreading your arms behind your head.
Step 3. Communicate outside
If you feel nervous during a conversation, instead of thinking about your nervousness, concentrate on the other person. Ask him questions like, what do you think? Or, how do you feel about it? It will help to concentrate on him rather than yourself.
But be careful not to ask too many questions, or this can make you feel nervous and unsure. When you ask a question, listen carefully and really focus and try to use his point of view and think about why he might respond the way he does. The key is to focus your attention on someone other than yourself
Step 4. Look directly at it
If you are talking to someone, look at them, don't look past them, or at your shoes, or at the beautiful painting on the wall. There is no need for constant direct eye contact, but you will appear less nervous and more confident if you look at the person you are talking to. Avoiding seeing someone is a sure sign of nervousness.
Step 5. Avoid wriggling limbs
To avoid looking nervous, you need to stay still. One sign of nervousness is moving the hands and/or feet a little; or doing things like twisting your hair. In order not to appear nervous, you need to focus your thoughts on remaining somewhat still.
Step 6. Keep your body still
Another sign of nervousness is rocking your body back and forth. Instead, focus on staying silent as much as possible. Imagine yourself as a solid and solid pillar. Another way to refrain from rocking your body is to stand up; it is more difficult to swing when your body is not in a position to do so.
Step 7. Avoid biting your nails
The people who were biting their nails looked nervous. If you feel like you need something to do with your mouth to get the nervous energy out, try chewing gum. But do it slowly or gently, otherwise your excessive chewing will make you look as nervous as if you were biting your nails.
Step 8. Keep an eye on your appearance
Your poise, or lack of composure, is shown by your physical demeanor and the way you use your hands. There are a number of things that can affect your calm:
- Holding both hands back. To fix this, try to keep your arms at your sides, but make sure to stay relaxed.
- Both hands were at the sides stiffly. This is much the opposite of the previous way; it will look as if you are trying to control your nervous movements. If your arm feels tight, it's a sign that you're positioning it too stiffly.
- Move your hand repeatedly in and out of the pocket. Instead, focus on keeping your hands in one place for a few minutes at a time.
- Button and then unbutton your jacket. This is useless behavior and will make you look nervous. If you're taking off your jacket, unbutton it, if not, leave it alone.
- Move your hands aimlessly toward your face or glasses. To work around this, keep your hands to the side and away from your face.
- Play with your jewelry or the object in your hand. If you try to keep your hands at your sides, you won't be able to nervously play things.
- With conscious effort, this manifestation of nervousness can be controlled.
Part 2 of 3: Think Calmly
Step 1. Assess what makes you nervous
Identify the cause of your nervousness. Think about what's going on in your life that might be causing you to feel nervous. Sometimes the answer is clear and right in front of you, like when you feel nervous before speaking in public. Other times, your nervousness can stem from more subtle or 'background' factors, such as when you're waiting to be notified of whether you've been accepted into university, or are awaiting the results of a medical exam.
Once you've identified the cause, you can start thinking about ways to think more calmly about it. For example, if you didn't make it into the university, you still have a chance at another school, or you could gain some life experience, take a break and apply again next year
Step 2. Breathe and calm down
Deep breathing produces many changes in the body, many of which reduce stress. Before speaking, try to take one or two deep breaths to see how you feel. Chances are you'll be less nervous and you'll appear less nervous afterwards.
Step 3. Work on one thing at a time
Sometimes we feel nervous when we realize how busy we are. But we can only do one thing efficiently at a time. Focus on the task in front of you and set a clear goal for making progress on it, then after achieving that development goal, move on to the next task.
Keep in mind that not all tasks are time bound equally. Be sure to prioritize the tasks with the most pressing deadlines
Step 4. Get out of the situation
If you're feeling nervous for some reason and you're having a hard time calming yourself down, see if you can get out of the situation politely. Say you need to go to the toilet or make an important phone call. This can give you a few minutes to cool off and distance yourself from other people.
Part 3 of 3: Calming Yourself
Step 1. Relax your muscles
Nervousness can cause your body to become tense. Overcome this by relaxing your muscles using a technique called Progressive Muscle Relaxation (PMR). Keep in mind that you have to do this technique in an enclosed space, otherwise it will look weird:
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First, inhale slowly and deeply, then tighten certain muscle groups in your body, such as your neck. To tone your muscles, use them and then squeeze them tightly for 5 seconds. It's okay if you feel uncomfortable and shake a little.
Be careful not to squeeze too tightly; stop immediately if you feel a sudden, sharp pain
- Then exhale slowly and relax the muscles in that muscle group completely; release all tension and let the muscles rest. The muscles in the group you train will feel weak and relaxed. Focus on recognizing the difference between how your muscles feel when they are tensed and when they are relaxed.
- Stay in the relaxed state for 15-20 seconds, then move on to the other muscle groups.
Step 2. Do exercise
Regular physical exercise can help improve your mood and make you feel calmer. So find a method of exercise that you enjoy, whether it's going to the gym, running around the track, or a long, fun walk, and keep working on it!
To help you stay motivated, try listening to upbeat music while exercising
Step 3. Practice relaxation techniques
There are a number of different ways to calm your mind, which will help you appear less nervous. But keep in mind that doing some of the following techniques can make you look nervous, given the fact that you're doing these techniques. If you don't want people to know that you're nervous, it might be a good idea to use whatever technique shows how you feel, in private.
- Breathe in deeply through your nose, count to five seconds, then exhale slowly through your mouth for five seconds. Continue this exercise until you feel calm. Then you will appear less nervous.
- Try to think of something else that makes you feel calm and less nervous. Think about a supportive loved one, your happy dog, or anything else that can give you peace and quiet.
- Imagine a calm and peaceful atmosphere. Imagine a very calm beach. The waves gently rolled over the pebbles, making a flowing sound as the water returned to the sea. Seagulls flew overhead, chirping softly. The wind blows slowly. Imagine this as deeply as you can and accept the serenity it brings.
Step 4. Practice your mindfulness
Having mindfulness is an attempt to direct your attention to the present moment and accept it without evaluating or judging it. Having mindfulness is an effective way to reduce anxiety, which can then help you avoid appearing nervous. There are a number of different ways to have mindfulness. You can feel aware of your body's sensations by recognizing the sensations in your body, without judging them. Pay attention to how you feel itchy, or how the air feels when it hits your skin. Start at the top or that of your body and work your way up the rest of the body. You can also be aware of your senses. Focus on your senses: sight, smell, taste, touch, and hearing. Don't judge information that passes through your senses; let it pass and leave you. Or you can be aware of your emotions. Name your emotions when you feel them: “fear”, “anxiety”, “nervousness”. Don't judge it, just observe it and feel it, then let it go.
Step 5. Try meditating
Meditation involves stilling your mind and being in the moment. When you meditate, you regulate your emotions better. This can help you stay calm and appear calm and less nervous. There are many different ways to meditate, and while meditation techniques take practice to learn, and it's probably easiest to learn them from an expert, you can also try them yourself: Try guided meditation. Use your five senses to the best of your ability, creating a calming image or scene in your mind. You can also try meditation with mantras. Repeat a word or sentence slowly in your mind. This will help focus your mind and get rid of unwanted anxiety-provoking thoughts.
Tips
- Don't squeeze your hands or play with your hair. Some people do this without even realizing it.
- Plan ahead when you know you're about to do something that makes you feel nervous. Know that it will happen so you can prepare for it.
- Practice in the mirror if you're going to do a speech or something.
- Stand tall; it will make you look more confident.
